A Grandmother's Tale Via Gmail

Submitted into Contest #34 in response to: Write a story told entirely through text messages or emails.... view prompt

29 comments

Drama Kids Funny

To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: new gmail account

hey nan its bean

still figuring gmail out

i wanted to know if you wanted to talk ya know since we gotta stay inside and all that

.,,././.,?<</./,/,/,/??

oops sorry

bye


To: lbeanf@gmail.com

From: grannynanny@gmail.com

Subject: Hi. 

What’s up Beanie-boo? I can’t believe your father actually caved in and gave you a gmail account even though I’ve been telling him for the last five years that you absolutely need one.

 I would love to chat. Apart from the Young Ladies’ Unofficial Book Club, I’ve got nothing to do. G-mailing you would make me less bored. 

Xoxo from Granny Nanny

P.S. Since I’m a grandmother and therefore wiser than you, I just wanted to point out all your mistakes in your last email. First, you capitalized nothing. Second, please add punctuation or my brain might explode. Thirdly, what are all those symbols you added? Jeez. Love ya. Byeeeeeee


To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: Re: Hi. 

Hi Nan. I know. Dad’s really strict about it tho. i can’t believe he actually came from you. 

It’s great that you wanna chat, but I don’t want to be distracting you from your obviously really important club. 

I’m very sorry for my spelling mistakes. See? I added punctuation this time 

Ugh our homeschool deal is really bad. 

Hope ur sitch is better than mine. 

heart emoji, party emoji (I can’t find the emojis on this thing)

Love ya 2, 

bean


To: lbeanf@gmail.com

From: grannynanny@gmail.com

Subject: Hi Beanie-boo

I know right!!! I can’t believe that Will is so up-tight about everything! Ugh. (He obviously gets it from is father) 

Btw, my Young Ladies’ Unofficial Book Club (aka YLUBC) isn’t actually that important. In fact, I’d rather not go. It’s just a munch of superstitious gals wanting to protect themselves from the virus, but HELL-O?! Coming together and chatting about dumb stuff like this is the real problem! (And yes, if you’re wondering, we don’t even talk about books.) 

I can’t believe you’re being homeschooled! That’s horrible! Back when I was a girl, you were only homeschooled if you were physically (and mentally) unable to go to school. So, what’s wrong with you? 

Oh, wait! I have an idea! How ’bout that you still didn’t use that much punctuation in your last email? I’ll list your mistakes: 4th sentence beginning you’ve gotta capitalize, what da heck does ‘tho’, ‘sitch’, ‘ur’, and ‘rly’ stand for, AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN PUT PUNCTUATION AFTER YOU SAID THAT YOU USED PUNCTUATION!!! 

Xoxo, Granny Nanny

P.S. 😼😈💗😇 suckah


To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: You’re so mean. 

Hey Nan. I can’t believe you know how to do emojis and I don’t. Wow. Well, we can make a deal. I’ll teach you slang text language and you can teach me how to do emojis. 

Here’s your first lesson: tho = though, sitch = situation, ur = your or you’re, rly = really. I’m sorry about the punctuation. Btw, your club is really stupid. No offense. Ok, now you have to send me instructions on how to get emojis. If I don’t have them, my brain might explode………

Wait! I have a good idea! Didn’t you say that no punctuation made you crazy? Well…..

grandma i wanna chat more

y dont we chat more

i wanna learn emojis

teach me

please 

cmon 

bye 

-bean


To: lbeanf@gmail.com 

From: grannynanny@gmail.com 

Subject: AGGGHHHH

Greetings, Bean. Wow. I couldn’t even read the end of your email. It was too hard. Guess what? I accept your deal. (Not because I can’t handle your horrific writing skills, it’s because I need to learn text slang.) 

I have exciting news! Before all of the virus stuff, I auditioned for Peter Pan. I recently got an email that said that I got in! A ton of young teens are in the play too, and all of our phone numbers were listed on the email. I was put on a group chat with a lot of people, and I need to sound cool over text. Teach me what you can. I need your knowledge and you need mine. Deal. 

Xoxo, Granny Nanny

P.S. I ditched the club. 


To: grannynanny@gmail.com 

From: lbeanf@gmail.com 

Subject: Re: AGGGHHHH

You. Did. Not. Ditch. The. Club. 

Look, I’m concerned for you health and all, and even though it was really stupid, I thought the club sounded fun! I’d love to be around whining and complaining old young ladies. 

I can’t believe you’re in a play! What’s your part? I’ll teach you all I can. 

TMI = too much information

BTW = by the way (i think you know this one) 

FYI = for your information

FWIW = for what its worth

OMG = oh my god

LOL = laugh out loud

IDK = i don’t know

IMO = in my opinion

WTF = where’s the food

bye, 

bean 


To: lbeanf@gmail.com

From: grannynanny@gmail.com

-No subject-

Ok. Thx. Bye. 


To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: How’d it go? 

Hey Nan! How’d texting with your new friends go? Did my advice help? Do they like you? What’s your part in the play? Why didn’t you say “Xoxo, Granny Nanny” this time? Are you busy? Are you safe? Are you okay? Will you answer my questions? 

Love ya lots, 

bean


To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: Re: How’d it go?

Hey Nan. It’s bean again. Is your play going well? I think it’s going good. You’re not replying to my emails, so I think you’re okay and safe. Right? 

Please answer me. I’m worried about you. Reply. 

Love ya to the moon and back (that continues on forever), 

bean


To: lbeanf@gmail.com

From: grannynanny@gmail.com

Subject: Busy. 

Hello Lilly Bean. I’m really busy now with the play and all, so please don’t email me that much. My new friends are gr8! We txt all the time! I’m a tree in the play, which doesn’t sound like a big part, but it actually is. 

bai gurl

Nan


To: grannynanny@gmail.com

From: lbeanf@gmail.com

Subject: Ok. 

I don’t even know why I’m emailing you, but I just wanna say that I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you go away. Maybe it’s your new friends, maybe it’s me. Sorry. 

I’ll always love you, Granny Nanny, no matter what. 

Your one and only, 

bean



March 27, 2020 05:11

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29 comments

Genevieve Taylor
15:28 Mar 27, 2020

Omg. I love this so much! This made me laugh, and with all that's going on right now, that is the best gift you could give me. And I love the ending! It was so sweet; you have captured the relationship between grandmother and granddaughter perfectly! Thank you.

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Scout Tahoe
04:58 Mar 29, 2020

Thank you, Genevieve. This is my first story on Reedsy. I feel like the situation should be flipped: the teen ignored the grandparent. Thank you for your comment. scout

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☆ Ariadne ☆
06:01 Dec 01, 2020

Oh, super-cool grandmothers are the best. This reminds me of something my own grandmother would do. My favorite line was this one: WTF = where’s the food Wow. I can tell how much better you are now (not that this isn't good) but still. It's amazing how much we authors change over time.

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Scout Tahoe
14:31 Dec 01, 2020

*whistles How embarrassing. Thanks, I guess. I thought about deleting this awhile ago but then I thought it was proof at how much I'd gotten better. :)

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☆ Ariadne ☆
19:12 Dec 02, 2020

*giggles No, no, it's good to look back on our old work sometimes! Knocks down that ever-inflating ego of ours, you know. And I definitely need that sometimes, haha. ;P Plus, it's fun to criticize our old stuff. Every time I read the things I wrote way back when there were flip-phones and no cars and -- okay, I'm falsely dating myself here. I'm not THAT old... or am I? My point is, it's totally okay to be embarrassed. We all are. It's all a part of being an author. ;P

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Scout Tahoe
19:21 Dec 02, 2020

Definitely agreeing on this end.

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Scout Tahoe
17:42 Dec 02, 2020

Hey Ria. Um, lionheart? I hope you know what that means haha because I don’t. We haven’t talked it in a while. ;)

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☆ Ariadne ☆
19:15 Dec 02, 2020

Wait, Lionheart? I'm confused. Did Ru send you here? Because Lionheart is the name of our little doc thing. We haven't! I've missed you, my fellow long-lost queen. How's life? I'm getting braces tomorrow -- wish me luck! I'm the type of gal who dramatizes everything, so I'm worried for everyone around me. They'll have to deal with a demon for a while (not that I'm not one normally lmao)

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Scout Tahoe
19:20 Dec 02, 2020

Haha, yikes. I had two sets of braces and they're awful. Utterly horrible. I meant you should come on our doc, is all. But don't worry if you're busy. :)

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☆ Ariadne ☆
20:18 Dec 02, 2020

Oh darn. Well, I still have 21 hours and 13 minutes until my appointment so... Oh! Now I feel dumb. Sure thing! :)

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Scout Tahoe
20:18 Dec 02, 2020

Ha—you’re counting.

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Willow Bird
13:58 Sep 12, 2020

I absolutely loved this!! It's such a common occurrence that teens ignore their grandparents, so it was hilarious to see the roles reversed. Great job!!

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Scout Tahoe
14:05 Sep 12, 2020

Glad you liked it! :)

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Lauren K
20:45 Sep 07, 2020

OMG! Your story is so good! I love how the argue back and forth!

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Scout Tahoe
21:26 Sep 07, 2020

:) Thanks!

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Faith Hunter
03:01 Aug 31, 2020

The part about the grandma's other friends was really fun. Great job! Can't wait to read more. -Faith

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Scout Tahoe
03:05 Aug 31, 2020

Hi Faith, thanks for commenting. I'm glad you liked my first story.

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07:47 Dec 01, 2020

Oooohhhh nice!!! A cool grandma? Lovely!!

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Scout Tahoe
14:31 Dec 01, 2020

Haha, why is everyone here. It's so bad, I know, but thanks.

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15:26 Dec 01, 2020

Hehe, its not bad at all!! :)

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Scout Tahoe
16:40 Dec 01, 2020

Oh, Sia, don't lie to me haha.

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04:18 Dec 02, 2020

I would never, :)

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Scout Tahoe
00:25 Dec 03, 2020

Good to hear, haha.

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Avani G
03:02 Dec 01, 2020

I decided to look back at your very first story since the first one is always a pleasure to read. And boy, was this funny! I giggled the whole way, and it shows how much you've improved, Scout. Really. Good job ☺️

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Scout Tahoe
03:24 Dec 01, 2020

Oh, God. How embarrassing. But thank you. Ha, I don't know what to say.

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Avani G
03:26 Dec 01, 2020

Haha, I know! Every time someone comments on my first story, I always cringe. Maybe it's the bad writing, or maybe it's just me. But I always cringe.

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Scout Tahoe
04:07 Dec 01, 2020

*She cringes when you type the word cringe. What a cringey word, she thinks.

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Avani G
13:06 Dec 01, 2020

😂

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Scout Tahoe
14:32 Dec 01, 2020

:P

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