Was it a Waste of Time if she was Beautiful?

Blake felt as though he had been stood up until Sarah stumbled in through the closed cafe doors. 

“Oh, God, I am so sorry.” She smiled and wiped the sweat off of her brow, “Traffic was a bitch.”

“No problem.” She was so stunning that she could have cut him off in traffic and he’d forgive her. She could spit hot coffee on him and he’d apologize to her. He could handle the girl being a little late. Blake would make this assessment over and over again when she was late to the next five dates-- and early to the sixth-- and concluded this was not a big deal. Everybody has their things-- Blake couldn’t eat tree nuts! Were the issues comparable, not really, but was Blake going to rationalize it this way because Sarah made him feel good.

When they moved in together, Sarah was fined $200 for missing the allotted time to meet the moving trucks. When Blake reorganized the next appointment he told her a time that was two hours before the actual time so she would show up. She beat the moving trucks by ten minutes-- a first for her. 

Blake’s patience could only extend so far. He fought her on her habits. Not getting ready until 30 minutes before she had to be somewhere, not keeping a schedule, not making sure she knew where she was going, always choosing the highly trafficked hours to go anywhere. 

“I always stop to smell the roses! Don’t you realize how many roses I smell? Are you going to tell me to stop taking in my surroundings and drone around the world like you? You’re boring, Blake! I don’t know how I stop myself from dying of boredom when you speak! Maybe if you got a life I wouldn’t be so late to come see you, or maybe you just wouldn’t care anymore!

“If I’m so boring I guess I’ll stop boring you and leave.”

“Fine.”

And he packed a bag and went to his sister’s house where he tried to sleep but didn’t. She called him in the morning to apologize and tell him she loved him. She said she’d come to get him at 10:00 but didn’t arrive until noon. Blake enjoyed coffee for it’s illuminating properties but when Sarah pulled up in her car, he couldn’t remember why he was so upset with her.

Once, Blake would walk in on Sarah crying in their bedroom. 

“Darling? What’s wrong?”

“I missed my consultation.”

“For your oncologist?”

“Yes. I don’t want to reschedule. I don’t know if I have it.”

“I’ll drive you next time, if we go together it will help with the stress.”

“Okay.” When Blake was with her she didn’t miss her appointments. When Blake was with her it calmed her soul despite not needing the calm. She was free of her mother’s cancer. 

When it came to a proposal, Blake thought he had an extra hour to get ready. He wanted something to express everything he loved about her and he wanted to express how she had made him feel for the past few years. He was on a ladder hanging up photos at the top of the walls so they could make their way downwards. He wanted photos everywhere to document happy smiles and loving embraces. He was still on that ladder when Sarah came into the house a lot earlier than expected. 

“Blake? What are you doing?” Sarah could not have broken his fall even if she tried.

“Blake?! Oh God. Oh God. Oh, are you okay?”

“I think my leg is broken.”

“Can you walk on it?”

Blake tried to stand up, “No.”

“I’ll call an ambulance.” 

With the ambulance on its way, Sarah had time to look at the work Blake had done. 

“What is this all for?”

“Nothing. Nothing.”

“Were you going to propose?”

“Uh… Yeah.”

“Can I still say yes?”

“What?” 

“Can I tell you yes? I wanna marry you.”

Blake waited in the ER for his fiance to arrive. She didn’t show until he had called his sister to help get him home.

"I'm sorry, Blake I'm sorry. I sat down for a second and fell asleep! How are you feeling?"

"I feel better just seeing you."

"That won't heal your leg," Sarah laughed. "Though, I have to say it is a memorable proposal." The two of them laughed together and felt like a normal couple despite the absurdity of their situation. How can two people who can hardly rely on one another be filled with such devotion?

The broken leg made things difficult. Blake couldn’t drive and had to rely on Sarah for once. 

“I feel like I’m always letting you down.”

“I just need to be on time for things. It makes me look bad to be late all the time.”

“Then ask someone else to drive you.”

“Sarah, when you are late for my things it makes me feel like you don't care about me."

“How could you say that? I feel like I’m always a disappointment to you. I am never enough for you."

“Of course you're enough… Can we just not fight about this right now? This shouldn’t be a fight, just try a little harder for me right now?”

“Fine.” Tensions remained high while the cast remained on. Sometimes Sarah wouldn’t come home until after midnight. She was always the girl to either work late or party late. Blake didn’t mind getting rides home from his coworkers. Sarah was making an extra effort to get Blake on time for work, though the effort was met with silent car rides.

"Sarah? Are you okay?"

"Yes. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, are we okay?"

"Blake, you always ask such silly things. Yes, we are fine. I know I'm working late, I know we haven't gone out together. I am making up for lost time at work. I'm getting my life together."

"I'm happy for you."

"I'm happy for myself."

"I love you."

"I know. Love you too."

On their wedding day, as Blake stood at the alter in his tuxedo, the priest told him that the next wedding was meant to start in an hour. Was there any way that the bride was ready to start? Blake realized there was nothing to start. Sarah wasn’t going to show up this time.