To Lose a Battle Before Breakfast

"Honey? You up?"

"Hmm?"

"You awake yet?"

"Yea…sure, yup. I’m up. What’s up?"

"I’m not feeling too well, I think your uncle gave me the same flu he had last week."

"Oh man, really?"

"Yeah. My throat’s aching bad. Could you stop by the drugstore and grab me some cough drops?"

"Sure, you need anything else? Nasal spray? Soup?"

"No, thanks for asking though honey. We should still have some in the basement. I’ll check after I take my nap."

"Sure, sure. If you change your mind just give me a call."

"Mhm."

"Yeah…okay, cool. Let me just take a shower and i’ll head out."

"…"

"What?"

"Never mind. Just forget I asked."

"Huh? What? Why?"

"Nothing. Forget it. I’ll get the drops myself."

"Why? I said i’d go."

"The fact that you even have to ask—"

"I don’t understand, why are you upset? I’m gonna go and get the cough drops, right?"

"No. It’s fine. Don’t get up. It’s not like I ever ask you for anything. The one time I don’t feel well and no one can help me out."

"I said I was going!"

"Yeah, after you finish your whole morning routine. I might as well wait for your father to get out of work and pick it up before he gets home."

"I’ll just go now. I don’t need to shower, it’s fine. I’ll do it once I get back."

"Ha! That’s funny. You? Look unpresentable? I’d hate to see the day."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know, I don’t get the luxury of showering whenever I want, or buying the clothes I’d like to have."

"No one’s stopping you from doing those things. Just shower whenever you want, buy whatever you want. It’s your money."

"Not when I have a kid to take care of."

"I have a job, you don’t have to buy me anything."

"Really? You consider what you do a job? Wake up and live in the real world. Be an adult for once."

"I am! I said I’d go get the stuff for you. Let me just do that."

"No, wouldn’t want anyone seeing you in a sweatshirt! Unlike me, who has no other clothes. I get to look like a peasant so you can walk around looking like royalty."

"This has nothing to do with getting the cough drops! I don’t get why you’re bringing this up!"

"Because I have to wake up and think about everyone else every single day without taking myself into consideration. That’s what it’s like being a mother."

"I didn’t ask you to do any of that. You want to buy yourself stuff, go ahead! I don’t mind you going out and taking time for yourself. Why would I care?"

"Because then who would drive you places? How would you get to school?"

"I’d just have Kris pick me up. She has her own car, she’s always driving around—"

"Oh, so that’s next huh? Your own car? You’re so ungrateful, you know that."

"I didn’t ask for a car! What are you even talking about? I don’t want one."

"You better hope you don’t, because i’m not laying out a single cent towards it."

"Okay! So don’t! That’s fine, I didn’t ask for a car!"

"You really are a spoiled brat, huh."

"Ya know what, never mind. Let me just get my shoes on. Just go lay down and i’ll have the cough drops for you when I get back."

"Oh, what, so now i’m lazy? Just because I don’t feel well one day?"

"Lazy? What are you talking about?"

"You just told me to lay down, as if I don’t do all the house work, and drive you to school, and take care of you when you’re the one who is sick, and—"

"That’s not what I said."

"Oh? Really? You’re gonna start lying to me now."

"I’m not lying. Why would I lie about that?"

"How should I know? Apparently you think I’m self-centered, and a drama queen, and-"

"C’mon, I never said any of that!"

"Can you let me finish one sentence? Am I not allowed to speak anymore?"

"That’s all you’ve been doing—"

"Oh really, now i’m talking to much."

"No, I didn’t mean—"

"In my own home."

"No, that’s not—"

"You’ll let me speak. Or do I not get an opinion anymore."

"Fine. Go ahead."

"…"

"…okay? What did you wanna say?

"You don’t get to rush me. Not after the shit you pulled earlier."

"What shit? What am I pulling? I don’t understand!"

"And now you’re cursing at me. Unbelievable."

"I’m not cursing at you! You just said—"

"Don’t raise your voice at me. I’m still your mother and you will show me some respect."

"Yeah, I know that, but how—"

"It’s like i’m talking in circles! Does no one listen to me? I’m talking to myself clearly!"

"No, i’m listening, I just don’t get why you’re mad! I’m confused—"

"You’re confused? How many times do I have to say the same shit over and over again?"

"Okay so then I guess I’m stupid. I just want to know—"

"I never said you’re stupid. Now you’re putting words in my mouth."

"No, i’m saying that i’m stupid—"

"So what, I did a shit job raising you? I’m a shit mother now?"

"Huh? What? I never said—"

"All I asked for what a simple favor. I didn’t feel good, I just wanted cough drops—"

"I said i’d go, I just wanted to shower first—"

"Just go back to sleep, that’s all you do is sleep anyway!”

"I said i’d go!"

"No, its fine. I have to learn that I won’t get any help in this house. I’ll have to do everything myself."

"I have no problem going, i’ll just throw on a hat—no, ma stop, just, leave the keys. I’ll go, you said you don’t feel well."

"You didn’t give a fuck earlier, why should you care now.”

"Ma, i’m sorry, I figured I’d get dressed and brush my teeth real quick, I wasn’t trying to not do you a favor."

"Save it. I have to do everything around here myself."

"Ma, just go back to bed, i’ll go.”

“Please, don’t put on your other shoe, I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you.”

“It’s really not an inconvenience. I have no issue going.”

"I can only hope your future children treat you with as much disregard and contempt as you show me.”

"I’m not disregarding you. I do care, I was gonna—"

"I’m going. End of discussion."

“…okay.”