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Funny Happy

Critical Thinking 

Rough Draft 

Setting: High school 

Topic: Love at first sight 

The story begins with our young protagonist waking up for school and starting on their morning routine. The usual hop out of bed, head straight to bathroom, wash up, brush teeth, and then get dressed up before heading downstairs for breakfast with their parents. Kisses goodbye and off towards the school bus. The school bus pulls in front of the school then everybody exits the vehicle. Our protagonist takes one look at the school and breathes out long exaggerated sigh. “Here we go again, another boring day out of my boring life” Who knows maybe today will be different. 

After two hours of long lectures and excruciating pop quizzes, our protagonist finds themselves walking down the hallway while scrolling through their phone apps not paying attention to what’s in front of them. They collide with something hard causing them to drop the device on the marble floor. 

“Oh sorry, my bad, wasn’t paying attention to where I was going” a deep voice said over them. They glanced up and were met with the prettiest blue eyes they had ever seen. Render speechless, they just stared at the potentially 6” tall male. He was gorgeous with medium length black hair complimentary with his heart shaped head, pale skin, and pink lips. Oh wow, that’s inappropriate, they thought avoiding his stare. 

“Let me get that for you” he reached down to pick up their phone. 

“Oh, that’s fine I got it” practically diving out their hand towards it. 

Their hands glided against each other, and they quickly stared back at each other. 

He stared intensely into their eyes not knowing what to do and our protagonist...starts to burst out laughing. 

“Umm...a-are you okay?” the male protagonist mouthed in confusion. 

“Okay cut!” they yell out to no one in particular. 

Wait...what? 

 “Hey, writer is you serious?” 

Are you talking to me? 

“Well duh, you the only one here aren’t you” 

You shouldn’t be talking, and I shouldn’t be answering. What’s going on? 

“News flash genius I am talking, and you are listening because you know why?” 

“You are writing it dipshit” 

Hey don’t be rude! 

“I think the only rude one here is you” 

How am I the rude one? 

“Cause your writing is terrible, you really couldn’t think of anything better than this?” 

Well, no, I mean yeah but this is a rough draft so it shouldn’t matter. 

“But this is boriiiiiiiiing, let alone cliché as hell” 

“You probably bored the audience to death” 

Like you could do better plus I think the story was going quite well. 

“Of course, you think that way because you’re the author but it’s trash! Doesn’t even sound original anymore” 

Well do you have any better ideas 

“Let’s start with your dreadful grammar with these run-on sentences, spelling errors, repeating phrases/words and the huge fact it sounds like you’re trying too hard” 

I’ll admit my grammar is quite bad, and it seems like I repeat myself too much because I’m not a quick thinker. I just use the first word that pops in my head, and I don’t know proper writing techniques like other people. In some ways, I try to write like other writers. Wow, am I really exposing myself right now?  

“There’s plenty of references and resources that can make you a better writer; you just have to look for them,” 

“Please....because you need it!” 

There you go being rude again, but I can take the hint. 

“Now back to task at hand” 

“Don’t you think we could go with a different male lead, no offense bro” 

“Non-taken” he mumbled 

What’s wrong with him? 

“He’s a pretty boy” 

“Pretty boys are nice and all” “But it seems like you were heading into the oh so classic route where the “new kid” (who happens to be a pretty boy) meets the laid back/quiet protagonist and me as well as the rest of the world is SICK OF IT! 

Then what would you prefer? 

“A thug” 

So, the bad boy dynamic? Another cliché 

“You right, let’s scratch the whole high school prompt all together” 

To...... 

“I want to be a ninja!” 

What the hell? I don’t know nothing about ninjas. 

“That’s what Google is for and this little place I like to call China” 

Oh my god, racist. I’m pretty sure they’re Japanese but I’m going to stop there before we both get cancelled. Mainly me. 

“I’m fine with that” 

Yeah okay, I’m just going to erase your existence completely. 

“Pfft, you can’t get rid of me” 

And why not? 

“Because you have exactly 237 more words to write to reach a thousand and you need the filler” 

Honestly, I surprised myself by making it this far. 

“So, I was right...” 

“You have no plan” 

This was the plan. 

“What was?” 

Winging it like I always do. Such as this whole scenario. 

“You’re likely to burn out eventually” 

No, I won’t. 

“I’m sure you lost the audience at this point” 

Maybe so, but it was funny at least. 

“I say you were mid at best” 

At least you’re honest. 

“What are we even talking about anymore” 

I don’t know 

“You really ran out of ideas” 

Seems like it. 

“Now you just sound crazy” 

The whole idea was crazy from the start 

“You’re really going to drag this out longer than necessary” 

Word play always wins. 

“If you changed it to ninjas from the beginning, we wouldn’t be here in the first place” 

Enough with the ninjas already. 

“Okay...how about samurais'” 

Nope, it’s too late. We’re almost reaching the end. 

“Do you at least have a closure?” 

Thank you, readers, for joining with me on my wild antics. Hopefully I made someone out there smile and laugh even just a little bit. Anything you like to say? 

“That you really lost the plot of this whole thing, and you don’t deserve any likes nor comments whatsoever” 

Oh, look at that, the end. 

“But I-” 

Bye. 

July 22, 2023 06:14

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1 comment

Lyle Closs
08:25 Aug 03, 2023

Nice twist, turning the messy writer's agonizing process into a story line.

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