Write a funny post-apocalyptic story.

Posted in Funny on Mar 30, 2021

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✍️ 110 stories

“DOOM AND ZOOM” by DASH Mancuso

Submitted to Contest #60

I opened my screen door just a sliver. I wanted to be able to catch a whiff of the Jasmine I planted last year. It was 6 a.m. and I was breaking county curfew. Hoping none of my neighbors saw my crime, I smelled the air deeply and then slowly, quietly pulled the door closed. The click of the latch made me squeeze my eyes shut and grit my teeth. I had a few hours before I logged in for my work day so I decided to distract myself from thoughts of being imprisoned for opening my door with the latest news. Grover Grooter was my f...

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“Ran and Sacked ” by Josiah Hyder

Submitted to Contest #60

I went for it because I was my stomach was eating itself and all of the grocery stores had been ransacked by the outskirt bandits and their exotic animals they walked around on with computer wire leashes. The smell made me want to puke up the drugs I was coming down from but then I'd have to face the second dark ages sober. It was already brutal enough with the elite artificial intelligence soldiers guiding citizens around like domestic animals. I had found the jar of pickles clutched in the arms of an old trampled bag who had been knocked o...

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“Comedy of horrors” by Arathi Raghuveer

Submitted to Contest #60

An eerie screeching sound of the door, droplets of rain going plop ,plop plop, swoosh the sound of air, rumbling sounds of the trees, a streak of lightning ,rustling sound of dry leaves, a werewolf’s lone cry , far away at a distance a woman’s shrieking sound , “ Dane’s voice was interrupted by Ivan “Oh Jesus , sounds like a horror movie, What next , it’s quite a thrilling story indeed , what next” exclaimed Ivan. “Don’t be impatient I will narrate the whole scene, and it’s not a movie its real, I have experienced it “. Dan...

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“The Apocalyptic Pepper Thief. ” by Ramore991 Amore

Submitted to Contest #60

“Good evening Mrs. Duvall,” said Adam, a tall, lanky man with blonde hair in his early twenties. Mrs. Duvall was a mannequin who had taken an unfortunate tumble out of an open department store window during the great quake. She was, more importantly, a great friend to Adam. “Mrs. Duvall you look ravishing as per usual” he said to the mannequin whose left arm was missing. He stopped for a second, squinted at the dummy and proclaimed, “I know what it is. You’ve had your hair done! How lovely. What’s that? Why yes, yes it has been dreadfully ho...

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“The Axe And The Fawn” by Chelsea Nixon

Submitted to Contest #60

I lift myself over the concrete ledge of debris and perch above my city. I deeply inhale the cold air. The fresh air always puts me at ease. I can hear everything up here in my concrete jungle and see far beyond into the overgrowth snaking around the never-ending fallen buildings. I slowly rise when I gain my footing on the high perch. I clench my fists and broaden my shoulders towards the world that can’t help but destroy everything in it’s wake. I look down for a moment to the far away Earth before crashing down towards it. I scream and ...

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“The Baby Apocalypse” by Melissa Olivo Heller

Submitted to Contest #60

written by Daisy Olivo Heller (10 years old) Hello, my name is spring. Though everyone calls me DaDa. Let me catch you up. Right now It is the apocalypse, and I can't talk. You see, I was born one week ago, and That's when the apocalypse started. I’m sure you are wondering how it started. Well I’m going to tell you even if you are not wondering. It all started yesterday when I was get...

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“Siamese Man” by Drew O.

Submitted to Contest #60

What’s the one thing we all take for granted? Salt. You know those people who try to go on low sodium diets, and one day they’ve gone too long without tasting anything, so they cave and spend their retirement funds on McDonalds fries? But there were no more McDonalds, because the world was trying to recover from a nuclear war that decimated the planet. So where the hell was I going to get my seasoning? “Can’t I just drink some ocean water with my food?” “Sure. If you want to grow a third ar...

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“Doomsday Playlist ” by Beth Robertson

Submitted to Contest #60

To a certain extent living through the cacophony of explosions deep beneath the earth, huddled together for moral support should make you appreciate your family, but it’s a love that still ebbs and flows. Before the war to end everything, I’d gone as far away as I could from them so that I could get some piece of mind and build my self esteem instead of staying and deflecting the quips meant to keep me in that place. Once things started to get real and the carrot-toned leader with corn silk hair began to stir the masses in every wh...

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“A Late Night Ponder” by R.C. Sova

Submitted to Contest #60

The rat was back again. Derek clenched his teeth, back rigid and stiff on the cot. He could hear it clicking, its tiny feet padding up and down the kitchen, crawling on top of the pots and pans. He couldn’t even pretend it wasn’t there, because it was making more noise than the air filtration system. It was getting more daring, because the rat knew. They had lived in this constant battle for more than two years. The rat would clang around in the kitchen, rummaging for the non-existent rations, and he would lay rigid in bed rummaging for ...

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“Blackberries, Pillows, and the Problem with Unions” by Sarah Newton

Submitted to Contest #60

A lot had changed in the half-decade since the inevitable zombie virus swept through and decimated the world’s population, any semblance of centralized government, law and order, and decent television. However, after the metaphorical dust had settled, some still found themselves adhering to a daily routine that hadn’t changed much from their pre-apocalyptic ones. For Dr Adam Able, his day still started at a time that even the Cain Township’s resident rooster found irritatingly early. This early hour of awakening was due to one part...

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“Is This Real Life or Just Dystopia?” by Cassie Poormokhtar

Submitted to Contest #60

Nobody warned me I’d be playing Scrabble at the end of the world. I thought we would have aliens with laser guns, or zombies at least, but no. The downfall of capitalism was a virus that just killed people, no reanimating involved. How disappointing. The end of the world felt an awful lot like everyday life. Except without jobs and the 40-hour work week. Instead people took up skating, biking, hiking, kayaking, baking their own bread, and doing puzzles, and making all kinds of stupid art. Now that I thought about it maybe this wasn’t the ...

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“Misty Morgan’s Guide to Happiness in a Post-Apocalyptic World” by Heidi Lacey

Submitted to Contest #60

For those of you who are a little fuzzy on your history, let’s review. There are some who insist that the Apocalypse began with the war with China, and while this is mostly true, the real cause is far more mundane. According to my extensive research, it actually began with the demise of the humble honeybee. The loss of the honeybee, a totally preventable occurrence according to my sources, devastated the world’s food supply. For example, do any of you even know what an apple is? Or a kumquat? Let alone what one tastes like? I think not. T...

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“Puff, Putt, Perfection” by Nic Azad

Submitted to Contest #60

Hi! I'm Will. Crazy times we are living in, huh? Or, should I say "I," seeing as how you aren't really here, are you? Crazy times I am living in. Anyway, I know what you must be thinking - "Oh no, the world has gone to shit! Poor Will. How did this all happen?!" Well, the long and short of it is, my world went crazy in all the ways you might expect. The two parties that comprised my government argued themselves into a permanent shutdown/stalemate. The right-leaning children clad in ill-fitting suits argued against the left-leaning childr...

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“Canned beans” by Cliff M.

Submitted to Contest #60

"This is not a test!" the robotic voice said through the TV. "The United States is under nuclear attack. You have exactly 15 minutes to find shelter. Fallout shelters will be open and you will be evacuated by local authorities. Every state is at risk" While almost all news channels were broadcasting the same thing, some of the privately-owned channels were having discussions between the hosts. A particular group of hosts was sitting on the couch. "Its fake news don't believe it." said one of the men "Even if it was, I still have my rights, I...

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“The Last to Die” by WRL Battle

Submitted to Contest #60

I am the last human to survive the Apocalypse. An accomplishment I am most proud of. Now I know you have many questions, so I'll try to answer most of them as best I can. The First and Most Obvious Question: How could you be the last human to survive the Apocalypse? Answer: Well, I have to explain a few things first. Okay. What I say next, you must promise me you won't laugh or sneer. Okay? I'm a time traveler, the only one as far as I can tell. I haven't really bumped into anyone like me durin...

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Write a funny post-apocalyptic story.

Submissions are closed

✍️ 110 stories

“DOOM AND ZOOM” by DASH Mancuso

“Ran and Sacked ” by Josiah Hyder

“Comedy of horrors” by Arathi Raghuveer

“The Apocalyptic Pepper Thief. ” by Ramore991 Amore

“The Axe And The Fawn” by Chelsea Nixon

“The Baby Apocalypse” by Melissa Olivo Heller

“Siamese Man” by Drew O.

“Doomsday Playlist ” by Beth Robertson

“A Late Night Ponder” by R.C. Sova

“Blackberries, Pillows, and the Problem with Unions” by Sarah Newton

“Is This Real Life or Just Dystopia?” by Cassie Poormokhtar

“Misty Morgan’s Guide to Happiness in a Post-Apocalyptic World” by Heidi Lacey

“Puff, Putt, Perfection” by Nic Azad

“Canned beans” by Cliff M.

“The Last to Die” by WRL Battle

🌟 Similar prompts

Write a post-apocalyptic story that features zombies.

Write a post-apocalyptic story triggered by climate change.

Write a post-apocalyptic thriller.

Write a post-apocalyptic romance.

Contest #60

Enter our weekly contest!

$50

Prize money

762

Contest entries

0

Stories

Win $250 in our short story competition 🏆

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