hiding in the Shadows

Hiding in the Shadows

Suzanne Marsh

“Sherman’s a comin', if yer got a lick of sense yer’d take ur family outta Atlanta.” Corporal Joshua Ashworth sought out his Captain:

“Sir, request permission to remove my family from Atlanta NOW! Them flames are getting real

close to my farm.”

The captain saw the smoke curling and rising over the city of Atlanta; Sherman was leaving his calling card. Captain Johnny McNamara had been to the small farm a few days before:

“Corporal, go, get your wife and son to safety. I don’t know how long General Hood can hold

em.”

Josh grabbed the reins of his horse, mounted, and galloped toward his farm, just outside of Atlanta. Fear gripped him as he galloped up the road; he heard screaming coming from the interior of the cabin. He broke the door down and rushed in. The fire whooshed as he broke down the door; he could hear his wife and child screaming. He rushed into the fire attempting to save them; he suffered burns to his entire body. He ran out of the cabin screaming; he heard horses coming, their hooves pounding the dirt road. He heard Captain McNamara’s voice:

“Josh, stay still, we are gonna fix a travois and take you to the doc.”

Two of the men quickly put Josh on the travails, and the men started back to their camp. They took him directly to the doctor; his injuries were horrible, beyond description:

“What happened to this man, sir? These burns, he will be lucky if he survives.” The doctor was horrified; Josh’s eyes appeared to have melted, and his head was bent downward. He had no idea how he could aid this man. Josh’s clothing was stuck to his skin; every time the doctor tried to remove a small piece of cloth, Josh’s screams could be heard throughout the camp. The doctor knew if Josh lived, he would have to hide in the shadows; his appearance was enough to scare most folks.

Months turned into years; the Second Rebellion ended; the South was defeated. Joshua began his travels at night; the west was where he aimed to go. Josh, from stories he had heard, Texas was the best place for him to hide; his wife and son were dead; no one wanted anything to do with him. He did not go out in public. Children either screamed and ran away from him or men in town poked fun at his disfigurement; his face was one mass of scar tissue. ‘Yes,’ he thought, ‘maybe Texas ain’t as fussy bout how folks look. He hid in the cabin he had built, where his wife and child died; all that was left was a burned-out shell of the cabin; he had been happy here after his burns healed. He felt a closeness to his wife and child.

Georgia nights were once again becoming cold as Josh mounted his horse and pointed him west. He moved by night and remained hidden during the day. He was scared of being seen in the daylight; he knew he looked like a horrible monster, his skin had melted against his face, which pulled him down because of the burns to his neck.

Joshua arrived in Presidio late on Saturday night; he could hear the piano playing in the saloon. He rode past with his Stetson pulled down to hide his face. He needed a place to sleep, some food, and the question uppermost in his mind was where. Then he saw Santa Teresa de Jesus Catholic Church; surely the priest would help him. He tethered his horse, then knocked on the door of the priest's house. A small Mexican boy answered the door:

“Si señor, what can I help you with?”

“I need to see the priest boy.”

The boy motioned Josh in, closed the door. He headed into the study. Moments later, a small priest entered the room:

“Yes, my son, the boy tells me you have business with me?”

Josh spoke softly:

“Yes, father, please ask the boy to leave the room. I don’t want to scare him.”

The priest motioned the boy to leave; Josh then removed his hat to his astonishment, and the priest took his appearance in stride:

“My son, how can I help you?”

“Father, I have been on the trail for five months. I sure could use a bath, some food, and

clean clothes. I can sleep in the barn where no one will see me.”

The priest felt a pang of sorrow for this young man:

“Very well, you may stay here. I have an extra room that you can sleep in. Is there any chance

you could do some repairs? The roof leaks when the rains come, the pear cactus grows in the

garden, not beans.”

For the first time in a very long time, Josh felt as if he could be happy here in Presidio. The priest introduced himself as Father Conrad, and the young boy, his helper, was Jose Vega. Father Conrad showed Josh to his room. The boy fetched the water for a bath. Father closed the door and spoke softly to Jose:

“The man in that room is going to stay here until he is settled. He will only do repairs at night.”

The boy inquired:

“Why only at night, Father?”

The priest sighed:

“Jose he was burned very badly. I hope he will speak about it to me; I wish to help him.”

After a few days' rest, Josh went to find Father Conrad:

“Father, I am ready to begin repairs on the roof. I will need a hammer, nails and shingles.

It won’t take long.”

The priest listened to the southern drawl and thought perhaps Josh had been in the Civil War. Later that morning, the priest asked:

“Joshua, how did you receive those burns?”

Josh hated the thought of reliving the death of his wife and son:

“Father, when Sherman was burning Atlanta, my wife and son were alone in our cabin. I had

a small farm just outside the city limits of Atlanta. They died in the cabin, I was...burned

very badly, my face is disfigured as you can see. I came to Texas hoping to forget the hurt

and anger I have felt these past three years.”

The priest understood:

“Joshua, it is time to let your wife and boy go. God sent you here to help you find a new life.

I have prayed for a handyman, and here you are. Those scars have healed on the outside; now

you must let them heal on the inside.”

Josh thought about what the priest was saying:

“Father, I look like a dang monster. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, it ain’t pretty.”

Father Conrad took a deep breath:

“Joshua, you must accept yourself for who you are, not what you think of you have become.

God loves all of us. What happened to you is a tragedy, but you survived. You could work

outside on the roof in the early morning when there is more light.”

The following morning, Joshua rose early, had breakfast of eggs and bacon. He then went to the barn, found a ladder. He carried the ladder back to the chapel and priesthouse. He began his job and felt better than he had since that fateful day.

A beautiful señorita brought lunch to the priest, the boy, and Josh. Her name was Rosita Fernandez, the boy’s sister. Josh was just climbing down the ladder when she arrived. He had his Stetson on to protect his eyes from the sun and hide his face. Rosita gasped as she saw Josh. She did not fear him, just his appearance. The priest introduced them to each other. Several months later, Josh went to the priest to find out who he must talk to. He wanted to marry Rosita. The priest was overjoyed; he told Josh to wait a few days so they could both go to the hacienda where Rosita resided. The priest prayed that all would go well.

The priest and Josh arrived at the hacienda de Vega, and a small white white-haired gentleman opened the door for them. The priest strode in first, followed by Josh. The frail old man wore a long-sleeved shirt and pants:

“Yes, Father, what may I do for you?”

Josh removed his Stetson, the old man gasped, but then gently said:

“What can I do for you, Joshua? Rosita speaks very well of you.”

Josh cleared his throat, gulped:

“I would like Rosita’s hand in marriage. The wages that Father Conrad pays me, I have saved

enough for a small farm. I may look like a monster, but I love your daughter so very much.”

The frail old man smiled:

“You cover those scars, why? I fought in the Mexican War. I wear the long sleeves because

I am disfigured; my arms were burned as badly as your face. You have my permission to

marry Rosita.”

Joshua and Father Conrad rode back to the church. The town heard about the wedding, and everyone came. There were a few gasps as Josh’s melted features, but most folks overlooked them. Josh had finally found happiness.