You Can't Have Fun Forever

In my family, my mother controlled the house. She was the “dictator” sometimes taking away our, my two sisters and me, time to go hang out with friends and have a social life forcing us and steering us in the direction of education and extracurriculars. My father, on the other hand, was more laid back and accepted any situation he was put in knowing that God had a plan for him and for all of us. My mother displayed her affection by “guiding” us in what she thinks is the best direction while my father provided financial stability and hoped that we learn from our mistakes. 

As of now, it has been one year since my mother passed away. For nearly my whole life, I was never invited to gatherings or made plans to gather with friends, and once a year I would go to my one and only friend’s birthday party, but about 3 months after my mother passed away I went through all the stages of grief and was finally able to spend time with my friend and new friends I had made outside of school. Because my father had put faith in God before my mother passed, he no longer believed that God had a plan for him and stopped going to Church resulting in me and my sisters stopping to go to Church as well. No Church means more hours on Sundays to hang out with friends, so that made me feel even better.

As my junior year of Highschool came to end I reflected on the school year and realized my grades were slightly lower by roughly 3% in each class, but I had the most fun in my life I have ever had. I met my girlfriend, made lots of new friends, and managed to keep my grades up. However, I realized all the extracurriculars my mom had forced me to attend were no longer part of my life meaning my future of getting into a good college would be sacrificed a little. Regardless, I was enjoying myself and passing all my classes and at that moment that’s all that mattered.

After hanging with friends for nearly all of summer break, the senior year came. During my senior year, my friend group grew larger and I began to get invited to parties that may or may not have had drugs and alcohol involved. If I’m going to be honest, I tried them all; I tried weed, had beer, and many more and by no time I became addicted to weed and was drinking at least twice a week. I was so addicted to smoking, drinking, and partying that my girlfriend even broke up with me and a couple of my closest friends left me leaving me with other addicted fellows. I have to admit it wasn’t my greatest year.

In my mind, I had thought my grades were good enough to get me into a decent college, but I let my grades slip during senior year to the point where I was failing every class but weightlifting. I graduated with a 3.5 GPA and was forced to go to community college which isn’t the best for pursuing a job with six figures.

Because I was so focused on partying all day and night I didn’t apply to any colleges, so after high school graduation, I knew I would be attending a community college. However, I still had 3 months to party hard until college would start. After the 3 months flew by so quickly it was time to focus. As the days came closer to the first day of college, I started to think of my future instead of just living in the moment and partying for months. I realized I have been relying on my father’s money and I know he’ll one day kick me out if I don’t get my life figured out. As hard as it was, I quit drinking and smoking in the realization of my shit future. I would need to do well in college all while working in order to get my life back on track. 

As college was going on and everyone else had gone their own ways to other colleges, I realized that all those friends I had made in high school were kinda meaningless. After I stopped staying in contact with all of them not a single person reached out to me to hang out. That’s when I realized all that time I put just simply having fun was a complete waste of my time. Even though I had fun, I sacrificed getting into a good college for friends and fun that would not last forever. Staying on top of my school work and continuing my extracurriculars could have definitely brought out permanent change by allowing me to get into a good college, but now all that time spent on partying would hurt my future by me studying at a community college.

Because community colleges still give out the same degrees as any other college I could still work my ass off in order to not see myself going down the wrong path of parties and addiction. All my life I thought my mother was the worst person in the world for making me do things I didn’t like, but in reality, she was just a loving mother who didn’t want her son to fail due to lack of education. In my heart, I always held her for being an authoritative parent who wouldn’t let me have fun or make friends, but she knew a life centered around fun and friends would only lead to a 9 to 5 job that would pay just enough so that you can live but not have fun in the end. 

At this moment I feel like if I had continued to chase the fun I would eventually come to a time in which I had no fun at all working a 9 to 5 job in order to just “live”. By not chasing the fun in high school and college you can have as much fun when you are older and in retirement as well with your significant other.