Love Is Sliding

It's not that my eyes haven’t dived in her eyes or hers into mine but that one time, when I was in the building where she attended her classes, everything felt different for some reason. I was about to take a turn round the corner when she walked in, and our eyes met for the umpteenth time but that time it was like maybe we both said something to each other... something I didn't know or understand.

And then she was gone but I met her again the following day.

The clouds were in a state of pandemonium. It's quite common here in Thamsfort. We were at the cafeteria for lunch. She was not sitting very near to me but was in sight and just when I glanced at her she was smiling (not towards me) and it started to rain. I exclaimed to myself, "Wow. She smiles and it rains."

While on my way to leaving the cafeteria, I saw her standing at the entryway, waiting for the rain to stop. She needed an umbrella, and I had the umbrella. I mustered up the courage to approach her and offered the umbrella.

"Hey, Dan, come on dude, let's go for a stroll. It's nice weather today. Your favorite. Cloudy." - A voice cut in my thoughts and brought me back to my dorm room. It was Chris Blake in his buzzing mood. It's quite visible from his bright brown eyes.

"Okay..." - I paused for a bit and poured myself a glass of cold water.

I continued, "Hey, you know what, I am gonna ask her out for Ice-cream today. I think I should text her?"

"Ice-cream... in this weather." Chris had a point.

But I countered, "Yeah. I mean it's not that cold. Anyways that doesn't matter, I'm just gonna ask her out."

"Sure. Sounds like a plan to me."

"I think I would ask her personally, face-to-face."

I put the glass on my desk, and we left the dorm for some strolling.

While we were walking, my eyes fell on a girl eating Ice-cream, in fact, she wasn't alone, there's someone else with her, some guy. That girl was her. Chao-Xing. Her black hairs were coming on her light brownie eyes. As she forced them back with her fingers, her Ice-cream fell. The guy just laughed at her. I also laughed but not on her... on my lunacy... how I thought I was gonna ask her out for Ice-cream and she was already having it with someone.

Chris looked me in the eye. It was a stare that said, "Well, I didn't find anything funny here." But who's to tell him how funny the situation was or maybe I was just dissimulating something behind my laughter. After all, I am a human being and I have learnt a long ago how to put on a mask.

Later at night, Chris came to my room all tensed and puffing.

"She's leaving tomorrow."

"TOMORROW, why, how?" I was filled with so many questions.

I continued, "I mean I know she has her final exam tomorrow but how could she leave so early?"

"I don't know that dude. But the thing is she is leaving tomorrow and you gotta do something."

"Like what?" - I asked Chris while picking myself up.

"Tell her that you love her."

"Ha... didn't you see her today. She already has a boyfriend. What's the point in telling her?"

"Since when do you started caring about points. Huh." - he waited for my response but then said, "No wait. I should tell you this, that guy...Darren... he knows her for a long time, longer than you, he even sang a song for her, and despite all this you still managed to befriend her."

"So..." - I shrugged.

"So, you go tomorrow and tell her how much you love her. I know one thing for sure and that is- You love her the way nobody could ever do. You look at her differently. Like she is the universe for you."

There was complete silent in the room and in the campus except for some howling of dogs longing for someone. We were both just staring at each other.

I pierced the silence, "Okay. I'm gonna go to her class tomorrow and tell her, in my style, that I love her, but I know her response already."

"How?"

"What do you expect from a girl who has a boyfriend?"

"Dude, you never expected anything from her then why now. Just tell her and by 'your style' did you mean you gonna write her poetry?"

 "Yep... my feelings, my words. Not someone else's."

After Chris left, I finished the poem and waited in my bed for the sun to come. While trying to sleep, I was thinking what would have happened if I haven't given her the umbrella the other day.

The sun rays coming through a chink in the curtains woke me up. I freshen up myself quick. I put the poem in my pocket and left. I was moving fast and as I took a turn round the corner my head slammed into a large solid box.

"C'mon Dan, let's go." - Chris shouted at me.

"You go, I have to meet Xing."

On my way to her class, I was thinking how and what was I gonna say to her. I was standing right in front of her class. Just when I was about to enter, I saw her coming.

"Hi Xing." - I greeted her.

"Hi but who are you? Have we met before? I don't think so."

"What!" - I was shocked. It felt like the lightning had strike my heart.

I spoke, "What! You don't know me. I'm Dan. Remember I gave you the umbrella the other day?"

"What umbrella? You never gave me one." She looked confused.

"Really..." - I was mortified and confused. What was happening with me?

"I guess I'm mistaken... sorry... anyways, good luck for your exam." I thought of getting some fresh air and make sense of what was happening.

"What exam? Dan, they are still a month away." She again looked confused.

I couldn't mince any words... I just smiled and left. I wanted to leave that place so desperately. I couldn't make out what was happening. Today was the exam, how could the exams be a month away.

I was sitting on the bench when a figure approached me. He was the same guy who was with Xing eating Ice-cream. He was practicing some song and asked me for review.

"You gonna sing for Chao-Xing?" - I asked.

He nodded.

I took out the paper from my pocket and handed it over to him. "I think you should recite this to her. She will like it... Ah... wait, she will love it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Go for it."

"Thanks man."

I wanted to meet Chris and ask him about all this shit that's happening.

"Hey, Chris...Um... We have our last exam today, right?"

"Dude, have you gone mad? They are still a month away. What has happened to you? You look a little bit pale." Chris thought I was joking.

"HaHa... leave it, I was just joking." - I was feeling awkward.

"C'mon, let's go to our class."

The sun went down but my thoughts were still afloat in my mind. I was still confused about this new world. Everything was a month back. The "Arts Concert" was a month back but it's happening tonight. Chris came and dragged me to the show. I didn't feel like going.

We sat behind Xing. A voice made me to look away from her, "This is for Chao-Xing." It was him, Darren.

"I love the nail-paints she does,

I love the way her fingers brush through her hair,"

Chris looked at me and shouted, "You wrote it. Didn't you?"

For a moment I was happy that my friend knew something was wrong here. He knew that I told him I would write a poem for Xing.

"I have read your poetry, and this is your style." - Chris said.

With that, he blew the light I saw for a moment.

Xing looked at me as if she had heard the conversation.

"I love her so much" - Darren stopped and then everyone was looking at Xing wondering what she was gonna say. Her eyes moved away from mine. She was about to mince some words but a loud "Boom!" noise stopped her in tracks.

There was a fire in the hall. Everyone was just running here and there. There was complete pandemonium. I looked for Xing but couldn't find her. I prayed she was safe. Till then the security had come over and they were escorting everyone out. They escorted me out. Outside I met Chris and asked him about Xing. He said he hasn't seen her yet. I couldn't resist myself and plunged right through the security into the blazing hall looking for Xing.

"Xing... Xing... Where are you?" - I screamed as hard as I could.

Chris saw her outside. She was asking the security whether everyone's out or not. Chris told her, "Xing, Dan went inside to look for you as he couldn't find you outside."

"What, why is he so stupid?" - Xing also plunged right through the security into the blazing hall.

"Dan... Dan..."

"Xing... Xing..."

Our blazing eyes met again. The fire had escalated. It was almost impossible for us to survive.

"You love me so much?" - She asked. She was getting unconscious.

I lifted her in my arms and ran as fast as I could. While in my arms, she mouthed, "I love you!"

I wanted to move but my body wasn't helping, it's losing its consciousness. I was fainting. I heard a loud "Boom!" noise and I fainted completely.

"Hey, Dan, wake up. What are you doing still sleeping?" I recognized the voice belonged to Chris.

"Don't you have to go to Chao-Xing's class?"

"What? Where am I? Do we have exam today?" - I bombarded Chris with questions.

"Dude, did you do some drugs or shit? Yeah, we have exam today."

Chris poured me a glass of water. I was feeling a bit awful. I thought maybe it was a just a dream. I looked on my desk but somehow, I couldn't find the paper on which the poem was written. I stood aghast. Where could the paper go? I looked confused so Chris asked me, "Everything okay..."

"Yeah. Let's go"

I guess that's my answer to the question of what would have happened if I haven't given Xing the umbrella that day.

A thought sent a shiver down my spine; what's actually gonna happen?

I reached the same corner. This time I walked carefully and as expected there was this huge solid box. I couldn't make out anything. All the way I was thinking whether Xing knew me or not.

Chris asked me, "You sure you gonna tell Chao-Xing?"

"Yeah, I ain't gonna lose her again."

"Again..." He looked confused.

"Um... nothing." I said with a sly smile.

I reached her classroom. She was already in the classroom. I was feeling a little bit nervous. I slowly walked inside and looked at her, she smiled towards me, and I was relieved that at least she knew me.

I stood at the front and said, "Everyone, Can I lend your ears just for a few minutes. I have something to say. If I didn't do it today, I won't be able to do it anytime."

Thankfully I remembered the poem.

I continued, "Today's her last day here. By 'her' I mean Chao-Xing. I have something to say to her.

"I love the nail-paint she does,

I love the way her fingers brush through her hair,

Seeing her, I get a terrific buzz,

Whispers of her name travel through the air.

She wears specs, I wear specs,

And when our eyes meet,

I could feel all the love specks,

Oh God, how is she so sweet.

Her whiff lasts longer,

Her heart beats in my chest,

I hope this lasts forever,

I hope to fill her life with zest.

It rained when she smiled,

Her smile drenched me and imbued me with love,

Maybe our hearts are entwined,

At a place no one can reach, a place high above.

I can't keep straggling anymore,

I wanna walk with you as long as there are stars above you,

I know exactly what I'm lookin' for,

It's you, you, and you.

I feel barmy saying all this,

Knowing that you already have a boo,

Feels like I'm stuck in an abyss,

I wonder if my 'I love you' would reach you."

Her eyes were looking a little bright. Was she crying? Did I make her cry? Oh, shit, was the poem that bad? - I thought to myself and then said the last words,

"Oh gosh, I shouldn't have written that much,

But... I love you so much." - I was lookin straight in her eyes.

"That's it. I just wanted to say this." - I thought of leaving the class but her voice stopped me. She called out my name, "Dan" and stood up. She was moving towards me. I was standing there in shock wondering what she's gonna do.

She came close to me and said what I wanted to hear from her all the time, "I love you!" and then she said it out loud, "I LOVE YOU!"

She whispered, "and he ain't my boo. He's just a normal friend. Anyways, when were you planning on saying 'ILY' to me? When I had left already. Stupid."

What I felt at that time was ineffable. The class was filled with applauses and whistles.

I asked her, "Wanna go grab some Ice-cream?"