Wisdom From Bookclub

This is a work of fiction based on real events, and the characters are made up of conglomerations of several people. There are references to some sexual acts which may be offensive to some.

Vonnie met new women by joining the book club in her new town.

Mary – ah, memorable Mary who turned thirty-eight when Vonnie was twenty-six. The book club was at Mary’s house on that birthday. Mary opened the door, welcoming everyone, with “Come in! Let’s hurry with the discussion because today I am thirty-eight. I’m told this is my sexual peak, and I want to take advantage of it."

Dorothy – age seventy-six, was non-plussed by Mary’s comments; she had seen it all and done much in her many years. Dorothy could drink us all under the table on an empty stomach and still walk a straight line. She bartended in New York City at Bemelmans Bar when she was twenty. She was an expert in mixing and drinking and was well-versed in the art of conversation. 

Mary had outdone herself with a table that would have made Good Housekeeping proud.

Beautifully arranged were several items she had picked up from the local market down the street:

Smoked Gouda

Grilled Green Olives

Grilled Artichoke Hearts

Roasted Asparagus Wrapped in Bacon

She had scattered around:

Tidbits of Crusty Bread

Smoked Salmon Spread

Ritz Crackers

Pumpernickel Bread Slices

Deviled Eggs

Petits Fours - white and chocolate cake with various buttercream frostings

We couldn’t stop stuffing our faces, so there was only a little book discussion. She explained the book, and a few of us commented between bits and huge gulps of Merlot and Chardonnay (Cara had Soda).

Cara – although four years older than Vonnie, seemed much younger due to her innocence. She blushed when the book club members, finished with the discussion of the monthly selection, delved into their personal lives. A mousy dishwater blond, she had two children and didn’t share much of her marital life to discussions. As a matter of fact, if the book was a bit steamy or had violence, she sat quietly listening to others’ opinions.

Joan – a beautiful sandy blond in her late forties, was a fountain of information for Vonnie about breastfeeding her three-month-old baby. Her smile lit up the room, and she had a sly sense of humor. When Vonnie first came to the book club, she had to bring the newborn with her. Joan said, “Breastfeeding is the best; no jugs to lug around; they are on your chest, ready to go.

Janet – was in her thirties and married to the high school football coach. Muscular and lanky, she preferred mystery books. She always brought her list of want-to-reads to the year's first meeting. When she selected our book, we knew it would be the next one on her list. She also always starred four on the list just in case she got to choose more than two for the year.

* Postmortem by Kay Scarpetta

* Death at La Fenice by Donna Leon

* Naked in Death by J.D.Robb

* 10 lb Penalty by Dick Francis

Alice – Age twenty-four, a waitress at Denny’s, with five kids under the age of six and a husband who worked the night shift. Poor Alice was perpetually exhausted from arising before dawn to clean up the house, wait for the sitter to arrive, and explain the chores she needed to be done. Her husband, Terry, always arrived home from work at seven-thirty in the morning and praised his wife for her fabulous breakfast while rapidly shoveling it down. He kissed all his kids running around the kitchen:

Maeve – named after her maternal grandma

Michael – for the maternal grandpa

Ryan – for the maternal great-grandpa

Shelby – for Terry’s mother

Tory – named (sort of) after Terry

Timmy – a name Terry really liked

Kissing Alice goodbye before she headed to Denny’s, Terry mumbled a quick hello to Josephine, their sitter, before lowering the dark-out shades in the bedroom. With headphones on, he would fall asleep until the cooking odors of dinner wafted upward and awoke him. (Alice regaled us with stories of her kids and Terry).

Libby – slightly overweight, Libby had a boy and a girl and a devoted husband who worked long hours so she could stay home and care for their kindergarten-age kids. Still young, they had met in high school, dated, married, and immediately had children. Her husband Jerry was a highly paid tool and die maker in the local factory, earning union wages, generous company-paid benefits, and a nice retirement. Sometimes Jerry had to attend a conference, and Libby would cry throughout book club because she missed him so much. Vonnie didn’t quite understand that. He was only gone for three or four days, tops! Why not enjoy the quiet time? Libby hated it when Jerry wasn’t there, becoming depressed. Maybe it was because, she claimed, they had sex every other night, sometimes twice. She also divulged they would make the kids play outside or take them to Bible Study so they could have sex in different places in their house.

Sue – Sue was another mousey housewife but had insightful comments on every book they discussed. She became known as Sex Kitten Sue because of a confession she made one night to the club. Sex Kitten Sue had a clientele. Her husband was gone a lot, and she took calls while he was out of town. Not on a sex phone line. Her clientele were line-haul truck drivers who would phone, and if she was available (i.e., husband out of town), she accepted the appointment and met them for sex. Paid sex! Her rates were:

1)   Regular - $200

2)   Fantasy - $500

3)   Oral -      $800

4)   A Night - $1200

5)   Phone - $100 (two-hour max)

She didn’t do anything kinky or masochistic. Still, we were all shocked; Mary asked the most questions while Cara turned the color of a radish.

**

Seven years passed, and the last book discussion memorialized Dorothy, who had passed away. Dorothy’s parting words were a list for the ladies written on a whiteboard:

Read

Write

Travel

Eat and Drink Merrily

Walk Everyday

Don’t Mourn

Be Happy

Live

Learn

LOVE