Come On, Jamie.

Tw// childloss and grief

“Come on, Jamie, you know you’ll like it here. We’re furthest from the school without leaving town, we’re close to work and your parents. The grocery store is right around the corner and Starbucks is across the street. We’ve got two bedrooms to decorate- one is ours, the others is for guests.” Frank said to her. “A living room for movie nights, and a kitchen for cooking our most favorite meals.” 

Jamie stood in the archway leading into the living room, unmoving. Her glassy eyes scanned the room slowly, back and forth, before finally landing back on Frank. One arm- her left- came across her body, latched onto her right side, while her right hand stayed clasped against the two edges of her scarf. 

The scarlet skirt she wore was a wedding gift.

Her shoes were old black flats. 

She wore this magenta scarf whenever she felt down- Frank and their daughter bought it for mother’s day just this past summer before school ended- among… other things… 

Things had been so hard for her these past few months- not that the incident hadn’t affected her husband, but he was able to get past his feelings in a different manner. He’s doing much better right now, the best since before everything changed. 

The apartment the couple was looking at was located on the fifth floor of the Santa Barbara Apartment Complex on Laslo Avenue- well within a positive neighborhood on the sunnier side of town. 

Frank knew how hard it would be to leave the house they’d lived in for the past several years- nine years, to be exact. That’s how long they’d been married, and living together. 

The house had been a gift from their daughter’s godmother- Annie. Big Aunty Annie, the entire family called her that. Little Annie is- was- the daughter of Jamie and Frank. 

A kind soul, beautiful young heart. 

Her green eyes shined in the sun and moonlight; her long black hair chased her everywhere she went; her tiny hands held onto her parents ever so tightly while having fun or even out of fear; and her smile… everyone’s favorite thing about her- it could light up a room or a day, small teeth bared bright whenever she laughed. 

Little Annie was always a shorter girl, skinnier too. But she was smart, she was fierce and brave. Almost never tired despite what her body was fighting- she was resilient. 

Loved by all her family, friends and the community. 

Big Annie gave the family everything they could ever need…

Except for more time. 

The least Big Annie could do after Little Annie passed away was help the couple work to sell the house. 

“The… the money…” Jamie started, but Frank stopped her by holding his hand up. 

“The money is going towards research as soon as we rent the apartment. Honey, you need to take this next step. You’re already back at work, we’ve already packed the house, you’re ready. And look, you’re already cleared to drive again by Dr. Rivero.” 

Frank went on and listed all of Jamie’s recovery-based accomplishments from the past several months. The more he talked, the more she listened and became more open to the reality of them leaving that place behind. 

“I’ll even put in a sturdy shelf somewhere for you to place your fake plant collection, the tiny ones that you love so much.” he whispered. 

The old house was on the other edge of town. 

The old house was near their daughter’s elementary school where she had the asthmatic attack and went into anaphylactic shock from the medicine that was given. 

The old house was near the hospital where Jamie and Frank had to turn off Little Annie’s life support after four days. 

The old house… is now void of Little Annie memories that took years to build and weeks to demolish. 

“I’m going to go find Billy and let him know that we’ll take the place.” Frank said, kissing his wife on the cheek before smiling and walking away. 

The door clicked shut behind him, and Jamie took a shuddered breath, gazing around the one-story apartment before her. 

The walls, she thought, could be painted with lovely lavender… 

And the bedroom, she imagined as she stepped closer to the door and gazed in, could be a deep red. 

This apartment… she realized with a tiny grin, could be the start of something new, brand new. 

Jamie understood the meaning of her new beginning, and decided right then and there that she was going to try harder with her recovery, and make the most of her life from here on out. 

It’s what Little Annie would have wanted- the young girl would have wanted her body to be donated to science, she would have wanted to comfort her mother from Heaven, she would have wanted her mother to make the money donation to leukemia research. 

Which Little Annie does, did, and will do. 

The little girl whose death was untimely and unfair- she struggled battling leukemia for a long time, but was in remission and on her own little road to recovery. But autopsy reports showed she had a severe allergic reaction to her asthma medication- doctor’s discovered that the girl’s immune system had altered because of the chemo. Some chemical components in the bronchodilator did not agree with the changed system. 

The money was given to Frank and Jamie by Big Annie- she encouraged them greatly to do whatever they wanted with the large sum, and put emphasis on whatever while standing outside of the vacant children’s room. 

Aunty Annie really wanted the money to go to research like Little Annie’s body was donated to science.

“Hey, I’m back. This place is officially ours.” Frank sighed, hopping onto the counter in the kitchen, still facing his wife who was still standing near the doorway of their new bedroom. 

“Jamie? Are you okay?” Frank asked, getting down and walking towards her. He was shocked as Jamie turned around, with a smile on her face, and nodded. 

“Let’s go get our stuff out of storage, we…” Jamie intertwined her fingers with Frank’s. “We have an apartment to decorate.”