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Romance

"Milk, eggs, potatoes and carrots. Forget anything?", Ajal said, seemingly talking to himself.

What he didn't do.

"Bread", I answered.

He nodded, took a shopping cart and we headed straight to the vegetables section. Ajal always came with me shopping. People could freak out if they just saw how some groceries "flew" around.

What meant that Ajal did most of the shopping. Typically, I just wandered around, marveling at the amount and variety of the products.

Like seriously, eight different toothpaste flavors? I was already happy when Joyce could bought one tube to share it with us all.

Or the fact that Ajal wouldn't even be allowed to shop here. Like, there's no way in hell they would've let a brown boy in 1968 in.

(even if he was legally allowed to. We're still in a small town, after all)

"Peyton?", Ajal said, checking on the eggs. "Could you get the bread, please?"

Anxiety tackled my breast. Even if I didn't needed to breath, it stopped in this moment automatically.

"On my way", I said shaking, fidgeting with my hands. I didn't knew why I'm that nervous.

I pulled up my hood and closed my eyes. Breath, Peyton. Breath. You can do this.

Be human.

Be human.

Be human.

My body solidified, I felt it. Somewhere, in a place that was always there but never active.

As I touched my other arm, I felt it. My skin with too many scars, my rough hair, my twitching eyes.

It felt so real, it nearly tricked my head into believing I never died.

I walked, wich was a bit strange now. Like my legs were out of shape, like they forget what they're supposed to do. Wich sounds imposible But it happens when you're longer a ghost than alive.

Being a ghost still sounded weird to me, to be honest. Being dead. Like, I'm still here! I still hear you! See you! Know you!

(Even if the last one is rare as time process)

I took bread out. I always think too much in my human body (or should I call it illusion?)

"Sorry", someone mumbled. I didn't knew why. What happend or if anything happend at all. I just knew, I had to return to Ajal as quick as possible, turning into a ghost again and be invisible again.

"T's okay."

I turned my back, in motion to go away. Escaping this here, this body, this situation (even if I don't know what it is).

"Wait!", the person said and, as I looked down on my arm, holding my arm. "You forget something."

It was a boy my age, one that wouldn't be allowed to enter the shop back then, smiling, holding a paggage of bread. The same kind I just picked.

I flushed. Alive, semi-alive, dead, ghost, some things (will) never change.

"Thank you", I said, taking the paggage back. For whatever reason, my eyes wandered higher, to his face.

His hair was fluffy and kind of reminded me of sheep's fleece. He had a crooked nose like it was broken multiple times. His eyes...no, it wasn't possible.

I won't ever forget that shade of brown. But...no. It can't be.

In this moment I just wanted to disappear into thin air, but it would just raise more questions.

(and for whatever reason, I didn't really wanted go)

The boy I always knew under the name Anthony Crowley stood right in front of me, young and looking the same as he left me. The boy I knew from my life. The boy I saw the last time in 1968.

I looked at him.

He looked at me.

No one said a word.

I didn't knew what to say.

And he didn't knew me.

Life is sometimes too cruel.

The boy-who-looked-like-Anthony opened his mouth and closed it in the same second. At least I'm not the only one too stunned to speak.

We just looked at each other. It could be seconds, minutes, more. Both of us opened our mouths and closed it soon after.

"Peyton!", Ajal said with a full shopping cart, dragging me away from this. He looked at me, then at the Anthony-like and smirked. "Should I let you here?"

I blushed again. "No, it's fine. We can go."

(I didn't wanted to)

My look went again to the boy. I wanted to ask a thousand questions, but I couldn't remember a single one of them.

"Abad!", a girl with blonde hair exclaimed. "Stop flirting, we gotta go."

Abad turned red. "I'm not flirting."

"Whatever. Come now, we don't have infinite time."

We both looked in each other's eyes again. His were chocolate brown, comforting and kind.

"Goodbye", we both said at the same time, turning our backs once again, even if it physically hurt me to do it.

Abad went with the girl. His friend? Cousin? Sister?

I frowned. Girlfriend?

I tried the urge to punch myself in the face. Why do I even care?

This isn't Anthony. It's Abad, his son, who just happens to looks like him.

Somehow this made me frown once more.

Ajal just smirked the whole time. He didn't said a word, because the first thing I did as Abad and I splited our paths was to die again. Going ghost, stop having a physical body.

"Who was that?", he finally asked as we left the shop. Normally, he wasn't so curious ( or at least never showed it) but this time he seemed to want to know it badly.

"If I just got a clue."

He raised a eyebrow. "You don't know?"

I looked down on the ground. "It wouldn't make sense."

"Less sense than a ghost?"

"At least you know the key to immortality, it is possible."

We both stopped talking, just watching the ground beneath us changing.

"Sorry."

"You don't have to", he said.

We silenced again until we arrived to the house.

"But you know, I also don't know the key to the ghostly afterlife but here you are. Not everything needs a explanation."

There has to be a better explanation than immortality.

May 26, 2023 22:28

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