The FiexXxtra Fiasco

Through is reflection in the glass case, Max stood motionless, studying the shoes. The upper, based on the Caesar Fiextra from the 2010s, specifically a limited run in partnership with Ted Bundy (the short lived rapper) was a mixture of fine Italian leather in lime and gray green, Styrofoam, and a band meant to emulate fish net stockings. Those could be rolled down, or pulled up to the knee, like Ted Bundy (the rapper) did at the Bonnaroo right before he was was murdered.

The design lines were based on the extremely popular 2022 Cassius Retread. Max used to have a pair, but he lost them. The lines on this one looked exactly the same, but dark gold. Just looking at them in their glass prison, he could feel how they'd hug his foot. They were built, crafted even, for the fashion-forward daily grinder. That's how they earned their name: FiexXxtra Retread 2025 in "Forested Sunset Gold."

Max returned to his reflection. He ruffled his hair, trying to look his best for the FiexXxtra Retreads. He took a gulp, realizing he had been salivating looking at the sneakers. In the reflection, he noticed he wasn't alone. Max saw a man on a bench sitting across for the store entrance.

Max recognized him as the local mall drifter. He was around even when he was in middle school. A rumor was circulating back then that one of his classmates caught the drifter feeding rats old movie theater popcorn by one of the more deserted mall exits. He got the name "Rat Andrew" from those rumors, though Max wasn't sure where the "Andrew" came from.

Max could see Rat Andrew was eating popcorn on the bench and wondered if he'd fished it out of the trash. He stopped salivating.

"How can I help you today sir?"

Max nearly jumped out of his shitty, old 2023 Cassius Retread knock-offs in indigo and ivory (not even a real color).

"Sir?" the voice repeated.

It was the cashier. Max recognized him: the brown curly hair, wide nervous grin, cool mustache.

"Cool mustache," said Max.

"Hey thanks man. I recognize you," the cashier replied.

"Did you go to Ted Bundy (the rapper) High School?" Max checked back on the FiexXtra Retreads as he spoke.

"I did. I just graduated," the cashier proclaimed.

"I'm going into junior year, but I knew I've seen you around," said Max.

"Cool man. I see you're checking out the FiexXxtras. Love the green and gold," hyped the cashier.

Then he paused.

"Sorry but, we sold out yesterday," the cashier stepped back apologetically.

"Sold out? Yesterday? They release today," said Max.

"Yeah, they were supposed to, but we got word to start selling them yesterday. They wanted to clear out inventory space for the Pillowfort Remasters in Marshmallow Pink. We're selling those tomorrow," he grinned.

"Dammit," mutter Max staring back at the case. "What about these ones?"

"What size are you?" asked the cashier.

"Ten."

"Well, these are tens, but we're not allowed to sell out of the display cases," explained the cashier.

"Why? And did you ask my size?" Max was getting frustrated.

"You look like size ten. I was just curious. And they won't let us sell out of the case or people won't have a reason to walk into the store."

"But you don't even have these for sale anymore," Max held his hands out, pleading for the FiexXxtras.

"I know. I know. Trust me. I think it's stupid," he paused again. "If you hang around here for thirty minutes, maybe, we might get permission to sell the new Pillowforts."

"What do they look like?" asked Max.

"Mmmmm, boxy. Comfy, but boxy and pink. Like light pink though."

"I think I'd need to see them," Max said looking around the store.

We don't have a display case for them yet," the cashier was following his gaze. "But I can get a box from the back. Size ten?"

"Yeah, size ten," Max smiled.

As the cashier wandered off, Max turned back to the FiexXxtras. There was something about their choice of colors with these ones in particular that spoke to his soul, his entire life up to this point. His reflection came back into focus, then the shoes, then him, then the shoes. Max's vision was blurring as he fused with the FiexXxtras.

As he came to, he realized his hands were pressed against either side of the display case. He had lifted it, in his stupor. Now the only thing between him and the sneakers was that new shoe smell.

"Hey, uhhh, man. What are you doing?" The cashier had stumbled back in from the back holding the ugliest shoes Max had ever seen. There was no going back.

Max dumped the plastic cube to the side and swiped the FiexXxtras. A jolt of lime and gray green electricity flowed up his arm the moment they touched. They were meant for each other.

"Help!" cried out the cashier. "Security!"

It was too late. Security couldn't stop Max now. He was going to run as fast as his shitty old shoes would carry him, far from the mall, far from the entire world. And when they finally fall apart, he will have his new FiexXxtras to wear.

"Hey! Stop right there!" a mall security officer had entered the store silently. "Drop the shoes. It's not too late kid." He was panting. He probably sprinted here.

Max took a step back. The officer took a step forward. Max looked to the plastic case on the ground. The officer lunged, hands out, reaching for Max as Max kicked the case up towards him. The officer ducked, and tripped forward onto his face.

Max could here him groaning as he ran out of the store. It was evening. The mall wasn't very packed, some stores had even partially rolled down their security gates to deter new customers. If the rest of the mall was this empty, he'd have a straight shot to the exit that backs up to the woods.

"Hey!" called the officer from the distance.

Max ran faster than he'd ever ran before, faster than when he'd tried out for the track team. He'd have to try out again next year, and hire this guy to chase him.

Max flowed through the food court like water. Families shuffling out, fallen trays of food, nothing was an obstacle for him. The FiexXxtras had made him hyper-aware of his surroundings. The Pillowforts would have probably put him to sleep.

Max took a moment to look back as he dodged behind the barking dog toy kiosk. The officer was still chasing him, red in the face. He might have even caught up a little. Max wasn't scared, he was on the home stretch now.

He bolted right where the old home goods store used to be, the dead corner of the mall. Save for a few vending machines and a photo booth, there was nothing between him and the doors. He sprinted.

Out of the abandoned home goods store appeared the officer. Somehow he'd gotten ahead of Max and looped around. Max couldn't slow down. He was heading right for him. The officer put out his hand and caught Max by the throat.

"There you are, you fucker," the officer put more pressure on Max's throat as he lifted him in the air. Max couldn't breathe. He wanted to reach for his throat, but he'd have to drop the FiexXxtras. The fluorescent lights began to fade, and the world was turning gray.

He looked into the officer's eyes, was he really going to die like this? I figure poked its head out from the photo booth. Max couldn't make out what it was as he lost consciousness.

Max could see nothing but black. He looked around and considered if this was heaven. Then he remembered that his final choice in life was stealing pair of shoes. He considered that maybe this place was hell. Then he noticed at his feet, two tiny men. They were wearing all green, with golden buckles on their tiny green top hats. Leprechauns went to hell?

The two tiny men looked up and snickered. One knocked the other over the head, and they began to wrestle. As they fought, their forms blurred and they began to take the form of Caesar Fiextra 2010s, with design lines based on the 2022 Cassius Retreads. Max slipped them on his feet.

He woke up with a gasp on the mall floor, in a puddle of his own piss. Standing over him was none other than Rat Andrew. Max blinked a few times, and rubbed his eyes.

"Are you okay?" Rat Andrew asked with a mouth full of popcorn.

"I think so," said Max.

Max rolled over and saw the officer slumped next to him.

"He's alive, I think," commented Rat Andrew. "But I don't think I can come back here."

"I'm sorry," said Max.

"No, it's okay. It was time for me to move on anyways." Max noticed Rat Andrew's feet as he began to ramble. They were bare, callused, filthy, and scabbed. Max felt around on the floor around him. There they were, the FiexXxtras. He held them up to Rat Andrew.

"Please, take them. You saved my life," he said.

"No thanks," said Rat Andrew. "I don't like shoes. And Suze and Amos only like size twelve or more."

"Suze and Amos?" asked Max.

"My rats. They're around here somewhere," Max watched Rat Andrew's filthy feet as he spun around. "Suze! Amos! Let's go!"

Two giant rats scurried toward him and crawled up his legs onto each arm. He looked back down at Max with a toothless grin.

"Better get up and out of here before someone finds us," he said. "The name's Steven. Take care."

"Yeah," said Max as he remembered to breathe. "I'll get up in a minute."

Rat Steven turned and walked away. As the automatic doors opened, Max saw his silhouette against the forest sunset gold sky and he looked like God.