Blinded By My Favorite Colour

Prompt: Write a story inspired by your favorite color.

Blinded By My Favorite Color

I grew up taking colors for granted. One never appreciates the world of color until it disappears from one’s view. I never planned for it to happen. It just did. One day I woke up and I was colorblind. My ophthalmologist was as much dumbfounded as I was. I had experienced no trauma to my head; nor did I have a familial history of color blindness.  My vision was now a black and white movie with silhouettes of people blurred in dark lines and shadows. I was especially encumbered by bright light. Sunlight was the worst. My disability was further handicapped by the dark sunglasses I was compelled to wear to protect what little I had left.

“So called friends” said I should be still be happy and grateful that I could see. Well to some extent that is true. I can still see what is in front of me, more or less. It is like being resuscitated by a machine to breathe over and over again. I had life but then it went away again and then you are dead (the cycle repeats). Once I lost my color vision the world around me became dead and lifeless.  “You never know what you got “til it’s gone.”  I hoped that with a significant loss of vision my other senses would step up and compensate for the loss of it. Apparently, that was not happening.

On a return trip to my eye doctor he said, “Might I suggest a relatively new form of treatment using specialized eye glasses? They are not color-enhancing glasses. Rather they help to filter out some of red and green wavelengths that are confusing your brain. Nighttime use must be strictly avoided. It will make everything completely dark. Also, if your red and green photo receptors diminish in number everything will cease to work.”

He paused to let his words sink in to my head. Then he asked, “What can you tell me about your favorite color? Talk therapy may help give you some perspective on your affliction.”

“Doc, I love red. Anything red.” 

He then asked, “Why is this color so special to you?”

I responded, “Are you sure you want to ask me this question? How much time have you got?

The doc said, “I don’t charge by the hour.  I have no more patients today. I will give you my full attention because this is all about the process of adjusting to your colorblindness and hopefully revealing an underlying cause.”

I said, “First of all, red is the first color in the spectrum of the rainbow.  I am a guy who loves firsts and things that are first. My first toy was a bright red firetruck. I spent hours mimicking the “varoom zoom” of the engine. I donned my red fire hat pretending I was the chief saving the life of my next-door neighbor, Scarlett. Scarlett was nothing short of beautiful with her red flowing, curly hair. But she also was my very first best friend.

It was during those early childhood years Scarlett and I would sit together eating delicious juicy red watermelon with an occasional handful of wild red cherries. The cool thing was they were grown on my uncle’s farm. I remember we would chase around the red rooster in the chicken coop thinking that he was not such a tough bird after all. How dare he pick on those unsuspecting hens! We would laugh hysterically.

Speaking of hysterics, there was a Halloween when Scarlett and I both dressed up as clowns. We wore large red Bozo-like shoes and spiked our hair upwards with red hair gel.  We painted our faces with red cheeks and glued red large noses on each other. The noses and the red gel were impossible to remove the next day. We never heard the end of it from our classmates. Scarlett and I joked about leaving the noses on until Christmas so we could dress up as Rudolph the Red nosed Reindeer. She was serious, but I drew the line finding some industrial strength glue remover.  (And did it sting)!

We could never get enough of my uncle’s farm. It was so much fun. There was a barn that my uncle painted red every year red to refresh its appearance. It was a splendid structure. Adjacent to it was his red rose garden. I recall how much my mom and aunt just loved to spend hours pruning and collecting the roses for sale at the town market. One time I pilfered a rose or two or three from the garden for my sweetheart (I mean my best friend) Scarlett.  I found a few red ladybugs on them for her. They tickled her fancy along with the roses.

During the spring, Scarlett and I would watch cardinals prepare their nests. Such a majestic red bird with a melodic voice. There were other noises we heard too, like the crack of a wooden bat on a baseball. It goes without saying that I am a St. Louis Cardinal baseball fan. I love all things about the team including the red seats at Busch Stadium. I was loathed by Cub fans in my neighborhood which just happened to be in Effingham, Illinois. The important thing was Scarlett loved the bird and the team, which was really good for me.”

The doc interrupted, “What other vivid memories do you have regarding the color red?”

“It was fall. Scarlett and I were cozying up to a red-hot fire cuddling under a plaid red blanket.  We had just finished our campfire dinner of juicy steaks. I remember how she liked her meat. Almost raw and so red. Somehow, I managed to get past that grisly site because the next thing that happened Scarlett planted a huge kiss on my lips. Her lips were so red from the steaks it was like having a second dinner. That kiss catapulted me into the red horizon above the setting sun.

Our time in high school seemed to evaporate, and it was not long before senior prom and graduation.  Scarlett beat me at our first kiss but this time I was determined to be first at asking her to the prom.  Without hesitation, Scarlett blurted out a resounding yes when I asked her in drama class as we practiced the play “Little Red Riding Hood.” Guess who was Little Red? With her flaming red locks, Scarlett of course. I on the other hand was the sinister Big Bad Wolf. 

Prom night descended upon us like a midwestern tornado. That night there was a tornado in the area. Red warning lights from emergency vehicles flashed and sirens deafened our ears. Thankfully, there were no tornados that touched down. The prom would carry on. Nonetheless, I was caught up in a whirlwind of my own. I waited at her house to escort her to the prom. Scarlett descended down the stairs dressed in a silky, flowing, red gown. Her hair was amazingly coiffed in layers of curls and waves. She wore her mom’s ruby necklace. Her feet were fitted with high heel red shoes. I was in awe of the splendor of this woman. I could hardly contain my excitement. We danced and we twirled. We laughed and we hugged. We kissed! She was in fact a Princess! No sooner had it began the night had ended.

We were back at school for our final days before graduation. Scarlett, however, was noticeably absent from classes. Where was my Scarlett? What was going on?  I had to see her. One afternoon I was determined to find out. Her mom let me in asking me to sit in the living room.  Scarlett came down the stairs but this time she was dressed in a red bathrobe and a red cap. I could not see her flowing red hair or ruby red cheeks. She was pale. Her motions were slow and feeble. Scarlett sat in a chair with great difficulty.  She spoke softly and I strained to listen.”

Scarlett said, “I love you so much! I am so sorry and I wanted to tell you a few days ago, but I became very sick from the chemotherapy.  The doctors say the cancer has metastasized quickly into my brain and bones.   My hair has fallen out from the treatments. They are uncertain where and how the cancer started. My prognosis is very poor for survival. All I have left is my mom, you, and my faith in Jesus. Do you still love me even now?”

My face flushed red at the revelation. I was devastated to learn of her illness. I was even sadder that she questioned my love for her.   I said, “Scarlett, my heart aches for you. I will always love you no matter what happens. I cannot bear the thought of living without you.”

I got down on one knee asking her, “please marry me now. I want to spend as much time with you as God has given you on this earth.”

Tears cascaded down on our cheeks. Our eyes were red from the crying.”

The doctor interrupted my story. “What do you see now at this very moment?”

I replied, “I am seeing the harshness and the horror of Scarlett’s reality. I am seeing the futility and hopelessness of helping her. She would not answer me about my proposal!”  I yelled at him saying “I just see red!”

He said, “Your anxiety and heartbreak have caused your color blindness. Go back to Scarlett and give her all your love in the remaining time she has without conditions. You will find that your intimate times together will ease the pain in your hearts. When her time comes, she will know the depth of your love and the richness of the commitment you offered her. The inevitability of her death will still be real for her. Your pain of losing her will still be real as well. Tap into the strength of her faith. Its power has healed her soul, and yours too if you let it. It may even remove your color blindness.”

My doc finished by quoting these verses to heal my heart and soul:

Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.  He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. (Psalm 103:1, 4)

He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds. (Psalm 147:3)

So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding. (Ephesians 1:6-8)

And so, dear brothers and sisters we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus. (Hebrews 10:19)

-END-

All Scripture from New Living Translation

Author: Pete Gautchier

Acknowledgment: Reedsy.com prompts