My Gemini

Hello, Alexis. I guess I'll just start this by telling you, I love you.

It's crazy. We've talked a handful of times but I think there's something right here. I think you know this too. I mean why else would you kiss me. To drive me crazy?

When you told me that you liked my vibes I thought you were just being kind. I like that you're nice is natural. When you laughed at my jokes, I wished I could be funny forever. It's hard being hilarious. When your fingers played with my lips and you bit the bottom one, I lost it. I'm not normal anymore.

You are all I think about. And I, a young teenage boy, am enamored with porn. No more. You are the only thing that can satisfy me.

I know we're young. I know you're with Bryan. I can't stand him. He is no good for someone your caliber. Nor am I.

Bryan sells pills. He lives a dangerous life.

Pablo stopped reading. He looked over to his partner, who spoke to a potential client.

“Yo,” he hollered.

His partner shook hands with the client and they went their own ways. Pablo watched the client, a homeless man with a posture that resembled a small r, waddle to him behind the laundromat.

Pablo gave a ball of tinfoil from the crease in his beanie to the man. When he left, Pablo continued. “What's the new guy's name?”

“Who?” His partner slipped a twenty dollar bill into a stack of many. A rubber band held them together.

“The high schooler?” Pablo played with the edges of the sheet of paper.

“Bryan.”

Pablo removed the beanie and scratched his scalp. He reread the last paragraph. “He got a girl?”

“Maybe. I don't follow him around. Why?”

“Just asking.”

“What was it?” His partner pointed at the paper. He had seen when the wind blew the crumpled ball to Pablo's feet.

“A corny ass love letter.” Pablo laughed. “This kid said he loves porn but not anymore since this chick kissed him.”

They laughed. Another client, a homeless dirty boy with a big smile, walked up to the front of the laundromat. Pablo folded the paper, placed it in his pocket, and served up the next customer.

Pablo stood for hours out there in the night. His upper back leaned on the lightpost. His eyes darted from his partner to movements in his peripherals to the middle school across the street.

Once the money slowed, he crouched and pulled out the letter and continued to read. The lightpost illuminated the words. Pablo guessed this letter probably came from the school.

Bryan lives a dangerous life. You have to know this. That life can affect your life. What if his enemies find out about you?

Enough of that. That isn't why I decided to write this. I'm writing this to tell you we are meant for each other.

I did some research and our signs are compatible. Your Gemini sun matches with my Aries. Your wind makes my flames dance. We could burn everything. We won't because we are both optimistic but we could destroy the world if we wanted to. That's power.

Right now, I'm not the strongest. I can be for you. Will you help me? I can help you and life would be easier.

Please write back, sincerely Antonio.

Pablo reread the name. Antonio. The tongue played with the ceiling of the mouth. A romantic name.

“Antonio and Alexis,” he folded the paper and slipped it back in his pocket. “I hope you get her.”

From sun down to sun up, Pablo stood by that laundromat. The customers knew he was the muscle behind his partner. Pablo would get his hands dirty if he had to.

As soon as cars crept into the lot of the school, his partner would close shop. They would ride their bikes to an apartment complex down the street. They passed the children going to school. Pablo never looked at them but his partner would greet them with good mornings and stay in school.

Pablo entered his cramped studio apartment. An outside table and an outside chair that he took from a party renting company and a mattress on the floor was all the furniture he had. It was all he needed. Anything else would be a waste of money and space. He slept.

That night he dreamt of his mother. She wore a white dress and waved her hand. She stood across a street. Pablo was in an alley waiting for a customer. He hid his face from her with a beanie. His vision was dark until she lifted the wool from his eyes. His heart raced. Her withered smile turned his fear into a drained expression.

“You look just like your father,” she said.

Pablo woke up. The sun was in the middle of the sky. He had to restock on the supply.

Pablo rode his bike for almost an hour to a small house that was surrounded by a decomposing chain linked fence. Two massive dogs barked as he opened the gate. They kicked up dirt as their collars held them to a beat up truck. The owner of the house opened the front screen door. Shirtless, he clasped his right palm with Pablo's and gave him a side hug.

This was his boss, the only man that got close to Pablo physically. Pablo could keep many people at striking distance but not his boss. He forced his way in. He looked out for Pablo. Extra money, extra hours, time off, and advice he gave Pablo. Not much with the other boys.

His partner and the new kid didn't greet Pablo. They were statues on the sofa in front of the coffee table that held a couple stacks of dollar bills.

“You guys can leave. I need to talk to Pablo,” the boss’ voice sounded like a receipt for years of cigarette sales.

They left and the boss began to vent. He didn't like the new kid, Bryan.

“That boy runs his mouth too damn much. I had to shut them up.”

“What was he saying?”

“Something about his middle school girlfriend, Alexis. I told him to shut up. I didn't want to hear about it. The boy is eighteen. What's he doing? He gave me attitude so I smacked him. He had a look in his eyes. Reminded me of your old man.”

Pablo winced. He felt his fist tighten than open. “Want me to fight him?”

“No need. He isn't with us anymore. He's someone else's problem.”

Pablo left his boss's house with a fat packets. He returned to the laundromat.

While riding his bike, he thought of his parent's relationship. His mom was young and his dad was much older. His mom went to school and his dad went to the bar.

Pablo looked at his forearms that he worked on and wished he could see his dad again. Pablo was strong now. He could stop him now.

That was the past and this was the present. He had to go to work. He took the street behind the middle school so he could sneak up to his light post. The sun's rays behind the school colored the clouds a light purple and orange. The leaves on the trees blew with the breeze.

On a corner, down the street from his spot, he saw a child sitting on the edge of the sidewalk. A red stop sign towered over the person.

Pablo stopped and studied the long haired kid that had their head buried between their knees. Slender arms hugged the knees and the hands gripped the hair. The kid's shoulders trembled from the deep weeping the chest produced.

“Are you okay?” Pablo asked.

The boy looked at him. Mucus dripped from the nostrils, his glasses were crooked and his eyes were bloodshot. He cried. “No.”

“What happened?” Pablo set his bike down and sat down next to him.

“My best friend's,” the boy struggled with the next word. “Gone.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.”

The boy sucked in air and talked with crying breaks scattered in his speech. “I don't know why he did it. He didn't tell me anything. I was his best friend. I thought. We were best friends, I know it. But he's gone and he didn't leave a note or anything. Now I feel selfish because I'm thinking it's my fault and I'm angry because I'm thinking about myself when he's gone.”

Pablo allowed the information to sink in. He thought of the love letter he found. “What was his name?”

The boy answered but his cries broke the name and he buried his head again. Pablo couldn't hear it. He was about to ask for it again but a gust of wind sent a sheet of paper into the sky and he let the information go.

“Wanna tell me about him?” Pablo asked and the kid did.

Pablo made a call to his boss letting him know he wouldn't make it in today. The boss was okay with that. Pablo stayed by the kid, who rambled about his best friend until he laughed.

“I told him if I was a girl, I'd definitely be his girlfriend,” the kid said and then there was silence.

Pablo could feel the second hand embarrassment of telling an adult that but Pablo didn't feel like an adult. He felt like he never grew up. A child would make a joke about what the boy said. An adult would understand.

“If that's not love, I don't know what is,” Pablo said.

“Yeah.”

“Listen,” Pablo wanted to be an adult. “Sometimes we go to some dark places in here.” He poked the side of his beanie. “It seems like we're stuck and we get desperate.” He breathed into his soul. “I'm not sure how to say this so I'll say it. Someone will always ask for you. And that's enough.”

“I like that.” The boy nodded.

“Me too.” Pablo stood and picked up his bike. “I have to go to work. Are you good, kid?”

“Yeah.”

“You should go home. I'm sure your parents are worried about you.”

The boy agreed and stood.

Before leaving each other's lives, a voice in Pablo's asked for the name.

Pablo called the boy from down the street. When the boy turned Pablo asked for the name. As the boy answered a truck passed by them and Pablo couldn't hear it. Pablo chuckled and reminded the kid to say no to drugs.