Arguments

“It’s bright… it hurts”

“You can look now, I won’t hurt you. At least not physically, not on purpose”

“Where am I?”

“A place you will not have to see for a long time”

“Then how come I can see it?”

“You always were a smart-aleck. You don’t see it, you only think you do. As well as that pain you felt, you didn’t really feel it. You only think you did.”

“Smart-aleck? Who are you and why am I here?”

“I wish you wouldn’t shout, it is considered rude here. You are here because you feel guilty. Or at least you would if you could remember.”

“Guilty? I don’t know who you are.”

“Yes. That’s how she would want it. Of course I don’t want you to feel that way either, but this is not the right way”

“I don’t understand who-“

“It’s time to get up”

“What?”

“It’s okay I forgive you. Ava you need to get up”

“How do you?”

“None of this was your fault. I forgive you. I know you didn’t mean to forget me.”

“Ava”

“I’ll see you in a while crocodile”

“Later… Al-”

“Ava! Get up”

“Mom?”

“Good morning. Get ready, your father is here”

…

“You’re in no position to tell me what’s right for my daughter”

“Our daughter deserves the truth. Both of them do.”

“She would want it this way”

“Of course I don’t want her to feel that either. This just isn’t the right way to do it”

“You know nothing on how to care for children. Need I remind you of the situation we’re in? A situation that you caused”

“It was a mistake but-“

“A mistake that landed me full custody.”

“I should have fought that more.”

“No. Your stubbornness and your ‘fight until the end’ attitude is exactly why she’s not with you. Why she’s not here with us.”

“You know I regret that every day”

“You should, honestly I should keep Ava away from you. If you really want to test my kindness then I suggest that you enjoy this last weekend with her.”

“Kindness my a-“

“Ava! Good to see you up and about. Do you have all your things?”

“Yeah. Hey Dad”

“Hey there my little crocodile”

“*Ahem* Ava come get your medicine”

“Alright”

“Now remember what the doctor said, put in your headphones and close your eyes-“

“While riding in the car to avoid car sickness, I remember.”

“Especially when your father is driving. He tends to swerve a lot”

“I got it Mom. I’ll see you later, I love you.”

“I love you too baby”

“Are you ready to go?”

“Yup. I’m all set”

“Drive safe dear!”

“Bye Mom”

“… you’re supposed to say ‘see you later alligator’”

…

“What were you and mom arguing about this time?”

“Just dumb financial stuff. Sorry, were we too loud?”

“No, I’m just curious. You guys don’t really talk about what happened.”

“Sometimes these things just happen. There is no reason life just hits you like…”

“A truck?”

“Yeah… I’m going to run to the store, do you want anything?”

“Animal crackers”

“Of course, you’ll never grow out of those will you?”

“What can I say, I like animals”

“I know. Maybe we should go to the zoo again, it’s been awhile.”

“I don’t remember ever going the first time.”

“Well you were really little”

“Like back when we were all one happy family?”

“That’s right. We were.”

“I wish I could remember”

“I’ll be back”

…

“Jeez dad, sometimes I think you’re a hoarder there’s so much stuff here.”

“Local car crash kills 15 year old girl, why does dad have this old newspaper clip?” 

“Wow, this girl and I could practically be twins. She does look quite familiar.”

“Ow, god my head”

…

“Hello again”

“Again? Where am I and who are you?”

“ I wish I could tell you more. But I can only tell you what you already suspect.”

“What are you talking about?”

“How long have you been diagnosed with these fainting spells?”

“As long as I can remember”

“How long is that? Ava.”

“How do you know my name?”

“Ava. Remember what I said.”

“What?”

“Ava!”

“Ava!”

“Ava!”

“Stop”

“Ava!”

“Stop it!”

“Ava! It’s okay, it’s okay it’s dad”

“What happened?”

“I don’t know, I just got back from the store and found you on the ground. Are you okay? Was it one of your episodes?”

“I guess so”

“You need to take your medicine then. I’ll go grab it”

“Actually Dad, can you just put it on the counter in the bathroom? I need to grab something and then I’ll take it in there.”

“Are you sure? I can grab it for you.”

“No it’s a bit personal”

“I see. Alright then”

…

“This medicine doesn’t help me anyway”

…

“How are you feeling?”

“Better. The cold water water helped”

“That’s good. You made me worried there.”

“Dad?”

“Do you remember when I was diagnosed with my condition?”

“Um, yeah, I think it was when you were 4. Why?”

“I was just wondering. Was that the reason you and Mom broke up?”

“No! No sweetheart that’s nowhere near why.”

“Is that why you lied about the argument earlier”

“… What did you hear”

“Did you cheat on Mom?”

“What?! No, where did you get that idea?”

“You said ‘both of your daughters’. I heard you. I know you’re lying about something.”

“That’s not-“

“Do I have a sister I don’t know about? Have you been hiding this from me the whole time?”

“Ava! Stop. I would never cheat on your mother and I would never lie to you about something like that. I love both of you deeply.”

“Then what are you lying about?”

“Ava, I can’t go into that right now.”

“Why not? Because you have more to hide?”

“No! Ava listen to me, this is not my choice. I can’t talk to you about this because of your mom.”

“What? Is she lying about this too?”

“You want the truth Ava? Fine, yes she is. But I would never lie to you because if I had the choice.”

“What do you mean ‘if you had a choice’. You do, you can choose not to lie to me.”

“No Ava I can’t. No actually you’re right, I do have a choice. But I chose to see my last daughter every other weekend for the rest of my life.”

“What are you-“

“Ava, your mother has full custody of you. She could force me to never see you again if she wanted to. I couldn’t stand that, I couldn’t stand losing another daughter.”

“Dad I-“

“No you’re right. I wasn’t strong enough. I wasn’t strong enough to control my temper and I wasn’t strong enough to fight for you. I’m sorry, you have every right to be mad at me”

“Dad, whatever it is, we can work it out. I will talk to Mom. I just don’t want any more secrets.”

“You’re right you deserve the truth. You deserve to hear what happened to your late sister.”