Leviathan Lurks

It took my breath away everytime I drove this stretch of road even though I had driven it a million times. Behind a curtain of trees the sun danced in the wind with bursts of light across the asphalt. Occasionally a blinding light would break through and force me to gaze on the seas’ unwavering expanse. Yet in solitude, fear enveloped me.

I kept the windows down to dampen the sweat and soothe my heart. I kept soft instrumental music on the radio, free from the threat of lyrics inadvertently stirring my emotions. My daughter’s home, once my home, drew nearer with each heartbeat. I drifted back in time to that warm home, adoring wife and my little angel.

It’s been eight years today since it happened. Such a stupid thing to do, but I did it. Sure, she was being a bitch, or was she just being a mother trying to make her daughter’s 5th birthday even more special than the ones before.

Fuck! I’d give anything to take that one moment back, that one impulse, that one thoughtless action that unleashed a 911 hell. Police, ambulance, neighbors … god what an awful day. Why was she standing so close, why didn’t I look before I lashed out. Blood sputtered from her neck like a monster’s slash. She still wears a scarf on most days. I didn’t wake up that morning as a monster, but by midday, that’s exactly what I was.

After that morning with Cathy and Chloe, I lost my job at the church. They had an image to protect so even a lowly maintenance man couldn’t be … me, or what I had become in the town’s eyes . My father said Fair Seas needed a lighthouse operator and I needed a purpose. The judge allowed that in lieu of jail time, so I took it.

Today was the first time I had been allowed by the courts or her mother to be there for her birthday or any other special event. The closer I got to my Chloe the faster I drove. My heart raced with the engine and the wind fought the dripping sweat. Drops dripped down my cheek and I suspected tears but it was probably sweat. Big breath, just breathe and get there safely I thought and my mind drifted to her gift.

Two-hundred-fifty-seven dollars for a tennis racket. Shit! Cathy swears she’ll love it. She better love it. What if she’s embarrassed to see me with her friends there? What if her friends hate me? What if I screw it up like I usually do? What if - DEER!

SHIT! … GUARD RAIL! … FUCK!

WATER!

…

I couldn’t breathe! I couldn’t move! I opened my eyes and I was under water. It was too dark to see. Then the water receded. I could hear the ocean. It was a wave. I exhaled … I’m on the beach and I’m not going to die. I tried to  lift my head but it was too heavy. I needed to escape the waves before … NO … This time I held my breath long enough to find the air again. I could move again and I shuffled forward out of the seas’ reach.

The clouds were so heavy and the air was dark as the night. But the color wasn’t right for a storm, not enough green. I craned my head off the sand and I could see stars in the distance. It wasn’t the clouds that darkened the air, it was the night sky and only the full moon to light the way.

I remembered Chloe. I remembered driving faster … wanting to calm down, but … the cliff!

I remember, I could see the top of the water through the windshield until all I could see was water.

Sea water erupted from my bowels! UGH!

The smell of vomit mixed with the taste of sea water and bile. What the hell? Here it comes again - UGH!

I could barely breathe with the relentless coughing and vomiting. The vomit rushed out my mouth and nose to the sand and sat there. That smell of salt and vomit dripped off my chin and through my nose. Able to lift my head a little higher, I gathered all the spit I could muster and tried to wash my mouth with my saliva. My hand was the best towel I could find since everything else was peppered with sand and salt.

My clothes were shredded and pain radiated through my whole body. Bite marks, small ones, on my arms and legs. The fish got me, but God saved me. I must be forgiven, I thought. There’s no other explanation. I’ve never had bite marks from fish and I’ve never been through anything like this.

Chloe! Shit!

I reached in my coat and was reminded my phone was on the dash of the car that seems to have been swallowed by the ocean.

But I could move. I could walk. I could hitchhike, if I could just get up. Once on the road, I hoped, someone would pick me up. The whole town knew me even if they didn't like me. Surely someone would help me. 

It took me twenty minutes to hike back up to the top. That’s adrenaline! It should have been an hour hike, maybe 45 minutes on a good day. All I can do is start walking and hope I catch a break. Now I see why they show hitchhikers walking backwards. Here comes one. Only a breeze of exhaust and rejection flew by.

Okay. Maybe the next guy. Damn! “O for two.”

Third time’s the charm … yes! An old truck … probably someone from the docks just past town. An arm waved from the driver side window pointing to the bed of the truck. A small window opened between the cab and the bed. Nothing was said. I took the hint.

Abby’s Diner, I yelled, and the window closed.

The front wall of the steel truck bed was cold to the touch but it blocked the even colder wind. Cathy will have a field day with this one! She’ll swear I was drunk or high … but I wasn’t. I was happy … I was excited, maybe too excited. The Abby’s Diner sign flashed in my right eye as it flew past me and hurried away from sight. I yelled for my driver to stop but he kept going. After Abby’s he flew past the bars and deeper into town. I banged on the window but he wouldn’t stop. I jumped to my feet to face the road before me. There was one more traffic light … it’s green … it’s yellow … it’s red … HONK! The truck slowed long enough for the big rig to pass in front him.

He stepped on the gas and I jumped!

ASSHOLE! I yelled. My soreness shifted to different places on the landing but I made it! Fuck hitchhiking, I couldn’t be more than a few miles away. Abby’s looked open when we passed, so did the whole town, so maybe it’s not that late.

A quarter mile in and I could see the Surf and Turf. It looked closed but there were still a few cars in the parking lot so it must be between 9 and 10. If there’s cars, then there are people and there are phones. I started to jog a little as I got closer. Two people walked outside and started walking towards me. Nice! When I could see their faces, they looked worried, scared even. I stopped and looked behind me but I didn’t see anything. When I turned back around, they were gone.

HEY!

I started running again. The same two people shot out of the hedges and straight into their car. I waved my arms but they didn’t see me. My feet were light and fast with endless energy. I yelled and waved and adrenaline rushed through my body! No pain, just power! I was a freight train and I ran straight into their cloud of dust and gravel. The car backfired and gravel pinged my face and my chest. Blinded, I stopped. They were gone!

I checked the doors of the Surf and Turf. Locked. Down the street I could see the light to the courthouse tower off in the distance. After that, it was less than a mile to Abby’s. Blue lights bounced off of the windows of the police station. A megaphone screeched in the distance but the only word I could hear was “barricade”.

A little further down I saw a young officer lean into the trunk of his car.

OFFICER!

He turned around with a shotgun in his hand.

“STOP” he commanded!

I just want to see my daughter and my wife. Why can’t …

BOOM! BOOM!

I stumbled backwards. Bean bag rounds, I thought. Otherwise, I’d be cut in half right now. He screamed and held the shotgun up like a shield. I grabbed his arms and pleaded with him to let me pass. When I let go, he fell to the ground. Lifeless.

I was shocked. I turned around and behind me was a mob of people from Fair Seas, running towards me with pitchforks and shovels and bats. I ran to them and they trampled me. I can’t breathe! I shouted. But they couldn’t hear me. I had no choice but to fight them off me. The smell of fear and shit filled the air. Sounds of piercing screams shattered my ears. I was soaked in blood and entrails and severed limbs and the fresh stench of death everywhere.

Thank God I was buried under those people or I would have been dead too. I climbed out of the pile of bodies and was mesmerized by the raw carnage. I looked for the monster that did it but I couldn’t see anything. All I could do was run. I ran into the blue lights for refuge. Behind me was a monster and I had to get away; I had to save Chloe and Cathy. I had to get my family back together again. I can’t let them down again!

When I reached the lights, I was met with a small army of officers with assault rifles aimed at me. Yes! I thought. Let me get passed you then you can shred whatever this fucking thing is! But they were too late. One by one the officers were ripped to pieces. Flesh flew off them with bones and bodies and blood spewing everywhere. Again I was soaked in blood but I was spared. Everyone of them was dead!

It must be the ocean water, the smell of fish on me or just the grace of God! I’ve been spared twice tonight. I must get to Cathy and Chloe to warn them and protect them! Another dozen officers poured out of the police station chasing towards the blockade, towards me.

Come on! I yelled leading them to Abby’s. As I ran down the street I could see other people out with guns hunting whatever this monster was. I yelled for them to get back inside. Some ran but others tried to follow me. I was so full of adrenaline I ran far ahead of the officers from the station. 

There’s Abby’s Diner.

CATHY - CHLOE! I screamed. Cathy was standing in the doorway! CATHY! I yelled again. She quickly ducked inside and stood there looking through the glass pane.

OPEN THE DOOR! CATHY! IT'S ME! HURRY! CATHY!

I reached the door and I could see her standing on the inside of Abby’s. I tried the door but it was locked. I banged on the door and she stepped back and aimed her pistol at me.

Cathy?

Cathy, where’s Chloe?

She stepped back, pulled the hammer back and put a laser site on my chest that pierced the glass between us.

Cathy? It’s me … 

But it wasn’t me in the glass. 

“Levi?” Said Cathy. She started to cry. Her lips quivered as she spoke.

“Levi?”

I put my hand to the window. She lowered the gun and mirrored her hand to mine. Through tears she looked into my eyes. She waited and cried until she could catch her breath again. Then the red laser rose and found its mark on my head this time. But was it my head? The laser I could see was on the head of a monster with terrible black eyes and blood soaked teeth.

That was me in the window.

The monster was me.

Cathy couldn’t pull the trigger, but she wouldn't let me in. The angry mob grew louder behind me and everything I loved was locked away in front of me. Something happened to me while I was in the sea. Something sinister has changed me. I lost the man I was and now I know, he’s lost forever. I wasn’t redeemed by God. I wasn’t saved or forgiven. I was in the wake of God’s wrath. I am the devil’s instrument, and I can never go back.