Sunset From Mars

He was kissing me.

It was magical, it was incredible, and it was forbidden. It made fireworks explode inside me and my heart race and my worries melt away, just for that moment. I wanted to make it last forever. I wanted the moment to freeze in time and be forever immortalized in a photograph, to collect dust on a shelf but never fade.

‘You have to go,’ Nolan murmured.

‘I know.’

‘Space is waiting for you.’

‘I know.’

Anything, anyone could have been waiting for me. But in that moment, I didn’t care about the challenges ahead or the struggles I’d face.

It was me and him, for the last time.

2 DAYS EARLIER

It was hot. Beads of perspiration clung to my forehead and my armpits were drenched in sweat. The heat rippled with the deep vermillion sun, shooting glaring rays through my window, also dotted with moisture. You’d think that the heat would slow the spread of the virus –after all, people initially thought it was just a cold. But no. If anything, it thrived in heat. People’s sweat and bodily fluids mixing and blending into a deathly disease-causing potion.

I’d wondered how it started as I stared at the screen of my large flat-screen plasma T.V from my leather sofa. As my heartrate pulsed in my ears and my jaw slowly swung open –I swore I could have heard it creak –and I hoped it was all a ruse. A terrible prank, even though, deep down, I knew it wasn’t. Quarantine facilities were being put in place. People were ordered to stay home. It was real.

Over the coming days, riots had plagued the streets outside my house. Police officers wearing bullet-proof vests with masks over their mouths and noses tried to arrest the protestors, who I wasn’t even sure knew what they were protesting for. What, the virus was going to back down because a couple hundred people took to the streets, yelling and screaming?

But soon, the protestors stopped. Retreated to their houses, dropping off, one by one. Blinds slid closed during the daytime, and I knew what it meant. People were dying. The ones that had been outside protesting, their bodies pressed against hundreds of others, had caught the Corvus flu (originated from a crow who had been taken over by a strange bacteria that continued to persist after it died) in a matter of days. Hell, a matter of hours. I didn’t need the news to tell me how contagious it was. It was happening outside my window.

Condensation clouded my phone’s screen and I gingerly wiped it away with the back of my hand. I was surprised my charger still worked –whenever I thought apocalypse, the first thing I thought of was the power going out.

‘Hey, Amara. What’s going on?’ I answered the call from my thirty-year-old sister, standing up and arching my back with a grimy t-shirt in hand, sore from leaning over my suitcase so long.

‘Lena, thank God. Mum’s dead. I’m sorry.’ She said it so bluntly. I felt my heart sink. The t-shirt fell from my hand, landing on the floor in a crumpled mess.

‘Jesus,’ I whimpered, trying to hold my voice from wavering. ‘No.’ I felt my throat thicken. It had been coming, I knew that. But it hadn’t been long at all. She only got Corvus yesterday. I’d talked to her once since then, her throat thick and scratchy, her eyes slow and watery.

‘I’m sorry.’ Amara repeated. ‘You can’t see her. Not till it’s safe. Have you packed your things?’ It was almost routine, now. The dying.

I paused, my head spinning. ‘Yeah. Yeah, I –almost. I’m almost done. I’ll be there tomorrow.’ I reassured weakly, my eyes scrunched closed, my hand massaging my sweaty forehead. A single tear slid out of the corner of my eye.

Amara hesitated. ‘Good. And Nolan?’

I glanced at my watch. Six-thirty. Nolan was supposed to call me at six, to bring his things, to bike to mine so we could take my car together to the launch pad the next morning.

‘He’ll be there,’ I assured, swallowing my doubt. I’d call him. He’d be fine. Nothing would happen to him. Nothing had happened to him. His parents had caught Corvus –but he wouldn’t visit them, would he?

‘Good.’ Amara said, her voice crackling over the phone. And then the call ended.

I sighed and dropped my phone in my pocket. My arms dangled limply from my sides and my head hung heavy from my shoulders. A cloud of gloom hung over me, which was strange, considering the dazzling, cloud-less, dusty apricot sky outside. It was as if the planet knew about Corvus and was crumbling too.

That was why we had to leave. Why we had to escape to Mars. There was a small safety pod there, where the first few astronauts had been sent a few years ago. They’d been thriving, but it was too small to be humanity’s last resort. But still, I was left to wonder –what would become of the planet without humans? When all of us either left or died out, what would remain?

I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand, pushing the thought from my mind. The past was over; the future was yet to come. All I could control was the present. I shoved my t-shirt I’d dropped into my suitcase, feeling sadness wash over me as I tucked it beside the others. Mum had bought it for me, waiting in line for three hours to get it signed by my favourite actor for my birthday, just months before Corvus hit. He was probably dead now, like anyone else. And anyway, it wasn’t her signature. But just knowing she had touched it, she had held it, she had cherished it and felt excited giving it to me made it hold a place in my heart, and I buried it among my other clothes.

It was hard to fit my entire life in one suitcase and a small backpack. I knew whatever I’d leave behind I’d never see again. I wanted more time, but we were running out. Corvus had consumed majority of the city and I knew I’d only survived on pure luck. I had considered leaving everything –why bring memories of the world you left behind to a new one –but couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Suddenly, my phone buzzed. I eagerly dug it out of my pocket and answered the call, pressing the phone to my ear as I brushed hair out of my face.

‘Nolan! Where are you? You were supposed to be here half an hour ago,’ I said, my voice frantic. There was a pause, and what sounded like breathing over the phone. ‘Nolan?’ I prompted.

‘My family’s dying, Le. My brother, my mum, my dad. They’ve all got it. They’re dying.’

I paused, my heart throbbing in my ears. ‘Jesus, I’m sorry, Nolan. That’s horrible. Are you okay?’ I asked gently.

‘I –I want to be with them. At least in their last moments, you know?’ His voice wavered.

‘I’m sorry, but you can’t. They’ll never let you on the ship if you might have the virus. You know that.’ I hated how heartless I sounded, but it was true. I hadn’t been able to visit my mum when she was dying, to aid her in her ill health, to bring her peace in her last moments. It ate away at me, but I knew it was for the best.

‘I –I know. I’m sorry, Le. I just –I just can’t imagine life –life without them. Life up there.’ I heard Nolan sniffle over the phone.

‘Me neither.’ It was the truth. But I could feel Nolan drifting away. I needed to reel him back in. ‘But it’s what we need to do. We need to survive. Promise me, Nolan. Promise me you won’t visit them.’

There was a long pause. So long, I thought he’d hung up.

‘I promise,’ Nolan said in a small voice.

‘Thank you.’ I felt my shoulders slump with relief, releasing a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding. ‘Are you still coming tonight?’

‘No, I –no, I don’t think so. I’ll bike to the launch pad tomorrow morning. I just need to get my thoughts in order.’ Nolan said, and I felt myself stiffen.

‘With your suitcase? On the bike? You can come to mine before, you know.’ I said.

‘Yeah. Look, I’ll manage. I just –I want to be alone right now, okay?’

‘Okay.’ I paused. ‘Take care of yourself, Nolan. I love you. I’ll see you tomorrow morning, okay?’

I waited until he’d confirmed until I hung up.

‘Okay. Love you too.’

Nolan ended the call, and I sunk back into the sofa behind me, my head hanging in my hands. My stomach knotted with anxious anticipation, sweat smearing into my eyes, my mind swimming with dread. He wouldn’t do anything stupid, would he? Nolan had been my rock, my beating heart, my soulmate, mine, for three years. And I couldn’t imagine life without him. If I could pack one thing into my suitcase, it would be him, bundled up so tightly with his knees tucked under his chin and his gorgeous chocolate brown hair, his long eyelashes hanging over his eyes and the cleft chin that I had swooned over. I couldn’t imagine life without him. We’d shared so many firsts together –our first kiss, our first serious relationship. I wondered if we’d share our lasts together too.

Sweat beaded on my forehead and I flipped like a pancake on a hot metal pan in my bed. Pancakes. I remembered what they tasted like, a warm, crispy edge, homemade topped with butter and sprinkles. Amara and I would fight over who got the last one when Mum made a batch. It’s okay, I can always make more, she had said. Which was true. Until it wasn’t.

Nolan wouldn’t visit his family, would he? I felt my fingers tingling, as if itching to grab my phone and call him. He had promised. And Nolan was one to take pride in always keeping promises –caring for them like a delicate infant, cradling them until he had fulfilled his duty.

The sky outside my window was a dusty black, humidity hanging in the air like poison. I rubbed my eyes and dark spots danced across my vision. What would it be like, away from Earth? What would it be like to live on Mars?

I awoke with a crick in my neck and my armpits drenched in sweat. I flipped over, noticing my suitcase hastily stuffed with clothes, but a tornado of things still scattered around it. I pulled my matted hair into a sloppy ponytail –that was another thing I’d forgotten. No more hair-ties in space. Slipping on a pair of shoes, I stumbled into the bathroom, fishing out a small keyring of hair-ties and throwing them into my bag. Then I stood, absorbing the room, wondering if I’d ever see one like it again.

The heat had dulled overnight, escaping from the atmosphere under the cloudless sky, but the sun was sharp and unforgiving. With a rusty groan of protest, my car started, and my gaze flicked to the worryingly low reading on the fuel gauge. I hoped it’d be enough to get me to the launch pad. I’d never have to use it after that. After the world had turned to shambles, no new petrol had been supplied to the abandoned petrol stations. And after that ran out, cars stopped whizzing down the streets, most abandoned by freeway exits while parents dragged confused kids by the arms, searching for refuge. But there was none. Corvus had stretched from every corner of the world to every city, suburb and farmland. It was closing in on the surviving residents faster than wildfire, tearing through households, the infection carried through the air.

‘Hi, I’m Lena Anderson. I’m here to board the ship.’ I flashed my ID at a man standing at the base of a massive, sprawling building, a rocket ship mounted on boosters pointed directly upwards.

The man grunted. ‘Wrist out. Let me check your temperature.’ His voice was muffled beneath a face mask and large plastic visor attached to a band around his head. I nodded and obliged, flipping my hand and exposing blue-green veins to his temperature reader which was cool as it pressed against my skin. I felt my heart drumming in my chest as the man scrutinized the reading, glancing at me through the plastic over his face and mine. Somehow, I’d gotten used to never seeing people’s mouths, only ever seeing their eyes through a foggy plastic screen that had been mass-produced at the start of the pandemic.

‘No flu-like symptoms at all recently?’ He asked. I vigorously shook my head. ‘Alright. Entrance is that way. We will be taking off in an hour. You’ll be asked to stay here for that hour and load your bags. You may not leave the premises.’ He jerked a hand towards a door at the base of the building, tiny in comparison.

‘Thank you. Oh, actually, my boyfriend’s going to be here too. Nolan Rogers? Is he here already?’ I asked, hesitating.

‘Haven’t seen a Nolan Rodgers today, sorry.’ He grunted. ‘You’re welcome to wait out here or in your car if you want to get out of the sun.’

I nodded slowly, beginning to drag my suitcase back to my car. ‘Okay, thanks.’

I watched out the back window of my car, dread simmering beneath my skin as minutes slowly ticked over. Where was Nolan? Surely he’d be here by now. Did he expect me to pick him up? My mind was swimming with possibilities.

Eventually, Nolan’s figure on his bike wavered on the heat waves in the distance. I let out a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding. But something wasn’t right. He wasn’t wearing a visor, or even a face mask.

‘Nolan!’ I hissed loudly as his bike screeched to a stop beside me. He had a water bottle in his rusty-green bike and a small backpack drooping over his shoulders but that was it –no suitcase. My eyes flicked over his belongings. ‘What are you doing?! Where’s your stuff?’ My voice was tight, like guitar strings pulled to stringently over the wooden frame.

‘Lena, I need to talk to you,’ Nolan said in a voice I had only associated with discussing death and taxes.

I tugged at his sleeve. ‘It’s fine. You’re here. Let’s go inside. We’re taking off in just over half an hour.’ I tried to walk off, but he didn’t move.

‘Lena, stop. Just listen, okay?’

I froze. ‘Nolan, we can discuss it inside. Let’s go. Hurry up –they still need to check your temperature.’

‘Lena!’ Nolan yelled, and I took a startled step back. ‘Listen to me. I can’t go with you.’

I blinked. ‘What?’

‘I’m not going with you.’

‘What do you mean, you’re not going with me? Why not?’ I spat.

Nolan hung his head. ‘My family,’ he said quietly. ‘They’re dying, Le. I want to be with them. I want to say goodbye.’

‘Nolan, you can’t be serious. If you see them, you die with them. It’s not too late. You didn’t visit them, did you?’ I took a cautionary step backwards.

‘No –no, I didn’t. I couldn’t risk it, for you. You have to get on that ship. You’re going to get out of here. But I’m not.’

‘What? No. No, I won’t accept that. You survived for a reason. We’re getting out of here, you and me.’ My voice broke. ‘Nolan, I –I can’t do this without you.’

‘I’m sorry, Le. I’ve made up my mind. I’ll die happy knowing you made it out. But I can’t go with you.’ He took a breath. ‘There’s nothing you can say to convince me. I came to say goodbye.’

‘No –no, Nolan, please.’ I stammered, tears brimming in my eyes. ‘I can’t do this without you. Please.’

‘You have your sister. You’ll be okay. I believe in you.’ He smiled a watery smile, his chocolate brown hair hanging limply over his eyes.

‘I’m never going to see you again,’ I whimpered, lifting my mask to rub my eyes. ‘But I –I love you.’

‘And I love you.’ I reached to pull my visor down, but Nolan grabbed my hand. He gently pulled my mask onto my chin, slipping a hand onto my back.

And the he kissed me.

It was magical, it was incredible, and it was forbidden. It made fireworks explode inside me and my heart race and my worries melt away, just for that moment. I wanted to make it last forever. I wanted the moment to freeze in time and be forever immortalized in a photograph, to collect dust on a shelf but never fade.

‘You have to go,’ Nolan murmured.

‘I know.’

‘Space is waiting for you.’

‘I know.’

Anything, anyone could have been waiting for me. But in that moment, I didn’t care about the challenges ahead or the struggles I’d face.

It was me and him, for the last time.