Donuts and Law

  “Well that's too bad, officer! I suppose that you would have to arrest me now! Wouldn't you!” I stared back into the man’s steely black eyes that seemed to scream annoyance at this uncooperating woman that Just wouldn’t pay that measely $100 that he required. 

  Well, little did he know that this “karen” was just an unlucky woman down to her last few bucks after getting kicked out by her toxic ex boyfriend and now sole life’s purpose was to get herself a nice fresh donut before she had to face reality of her pride. 

  “Why couldn’t you have just kept your mouth shut and tolerated his disgusting acts of cheating until you could get back on your feet??” I mentally berated myself yet again, before sighing heavily and digging into my jeans pocket to extract the precious few dollars I had in there, my last life savings after I had stormed angrily out there without grabbing a thing. 

  Even that ugly “vintage” vase would have sufficed for a few hundred bucks! And now that my credit card has been completely overused by his little side chick, I was not only broke, but allegedly a few thousands in the bucket! At this point I generally could not care less about this officer who had a warm home to get back to, and surely a loving family.

  “Maam, I know you don’t want to waste $100 on a speeding ticket, money Doesn’t fall from the sky, I get that, but you Were speeding and hence you Have to pay the speeding ticket!”

  Now those were two words I hated the most. “Pay” and “Have”. No-one was making me do anything when I was already in this state! 

  “Well officer, I am pretty sure that I only just barely touched the maximum speed, and as I Am the driver of this car, I believe that my word is more accurate and accountable than yours, wouldn’t I?” I smirked up, not budging from my seat.” God himself would find it hard to prise this woman up from her stool. “I believe that the speeding camera would be the most accurate for this instance, and not your eyes, my lady” The officer remarked, one eyebrow lifted in disdain, levelling me with a glance. I gazed cooly back. “Well, let's see the evidence, shall we.” I shot back,  admiring my nails like they were the most beautiful things in the world, which they Were until I failed to get them repainted for several weeks and now resembled an old peeling wall, quite unfortunately. His mouth turned down in anger/annoyance? And he cast a judgemental look at my beautifully peeling nails, before muttering through gritted teeth: “Maam, the records are very inconvenient to find, and I’m sure we can arrange something else in place to judge your innocence in this matter, so please cooperate.”

 An ear blaring honk caused me to jump right out of my skin, feeling the world whirl as I fell backwards out of the open car door, right into..arms? THe officer had caught me in the traditional dramatic K-drama moment, chipped nails and all, and set me back to my feet coolly, as if he had just opened the door for me, before casting a knowing glance at the cars behind us, furious at my refusal to pay, which resulted in a one lane blockage, which the business men/women/students were not very happy about. 

  He looked down at me, expecting me to cower in the face of my lack of judgement, to his eyebrows almost lifted to his curling hair as I glared right back. So now people who had jobs, a home and a steady income were angry at a woman just trying to weasel her way out of a $97 debt due to just trying to make her way to her beloved donut faster?

  Well How ungrateful and unthinking of them! “Let them rot I say.” I announced dramatically, getting out now and staring him down as best as I could from my rather unfortunate head position at his shoulders. “Hello, I need backup for a woman refusing to abide by the laws.” he reported into his walkie talkie (where did that come from?) whilst smirking down at me. I crossed my arms defiantely. Let's see what they would pit against a woman with nothing left in the world but time, and I would gladly spend some time with these annoying officers, trying to poke their nose into everyone’s businesses all day!

  An hour later, after an hour of my stomach’s constant reminders of the overdue donut and the officer’s sighs, the “Back-up” had arrived in the face of a beautiful latino woman.  She was the picture of femininity, hair tied up in a neat bun above milky mocha skin and a calm smile. If I were to be publicly embarrassed, I would choose to go by her hand.

  Turning my head to observe my nails once more, I could hear Officer Collins (I think that's the name he told me) complaining exasperatedly to the Back-up lady about my antics and refusal of crime. Sighing loudly, she whispered something in a scathing tone to him, and I overheard a few words like “Bring her in” and “Isn’t it obvious?” (Not that I was eavesdropping or anything- Holly Dwane would Never eavesdrop on officers of the law!) But the words I caught were quite alarming and so I decided to dish out my final card: The weepy why did this happen Card!

  “Maam, I don’t know why this officer just keeps on harassing me to pay a fine that I clearly did not rack up, especially when I already have nowhere to go and am down to the last cent! Practically.” I delivered, in a tone that would make Hollywood actresses proud, making sure to convey the level of distress I felt!

  “The only things I know are true are the last parts, maam, if you need help, there is help to offer, there is no need for you to waste our officer’s time over here.” she brutally revealed, smiling calmly all the while. I changed my mind. I hate her. I could feel the flaming hot sensation of my embarrassment taking place physically on my face as blotches of red, before the officer Collins sighed (he did that a lot).

  Suddenly, that epiphany hit me: I had been delaying their work and the possibility of them going home just because I couldn’t own up to me being unable to pay a single fine, I was truly despicable.

  “I’m sorry…She’s right, I just couldn’t stand the thought of admitting that I couldn’t pay up to you… I'm so sorry for wasting your time like this!” A blabber of words streamed out, whilst I focused on the floor because who wants to look at my chipped nails for so long?

  Suddenly, I felt a hand on my back. It was Back-up! Her whole face had changed, quite creepily, the smile she wore felt private, detached from her identity as a fellow enforcer of the law, and as words that I thought would never come out of her mouth at me appeared: Lets..Go..Get…Coffee…Together….figure..this….out, it appeared like a ray of sunlight had blessed me, and that everything would be alright after all.

  Take note, Future Holly Dwane, Swallow your pride, stop looking at your nails, and apologize faster!