Tears of Change

The bus wasn’t supposed to be there, with its tires plowing through puddles and the brakes screeching from the torrential rain. She took it in seconds too late, watching in disbelief as her stomach’s contents curdled. “Look out!” 

    He doesn’t.

    Blink.

    Breathe.

    Move.

    Kyle is too engrossed with anger written across the chiseled planes of his face to notice. He grumbles under his breath, shoving fisted hands into the button-down pockets on his coat. Those strands of caramel hair blow in the sudden breeze, shifting across the defined cut of his jaw. 

    “Wait!”

      He turns to her at the last moment, his lips screwed tight at the seams with aggravation.

      The pain returns, squeezing her heart into a vice.

      The screams.

      The tears.

      The apologies. 

      But those ocean-blue eyes that shimmered like sea glass in the sunlight held her captive. And they would… for eternity. Until the world decided to-

      “We’re done, Eve. We already established this.”

       “Yes. But-”

       “Good.” His burly shoulders bunch up, trying desperately to block out the wailing wind. 

        But the bus was still there, the driver desperately honking the horn. Walls of water came up, waves in the sea churning from on ongoing storm. 

      Her lips purse, and her thoughts race. “H…hold on-”

      Too late.

***

Eve took a seat on one of the many chairs offered up at the funeral home, twirling around what used to be her and Kyle’s favorite flower. A beautiful bouquet of tulips in shades of orange, yellow, and red. The brightest colors currently in a room swathed in nothing but gray, black, and shadows. His girlfriend stood near the casket, dabbing at her eyes with the corner of a handkerchief. “And to think how quickly a day can change things.”

   Eve flinched, trying hard not to let it show.

   Besides, the wound was an old cut, nothing that should concern her any longer. He cheated on her when she left town for a business trip, a shock to the system that nearly gave her a heart attack.

     Wine under the light of a full moon’s glow? Nonsense.

     Dancing sweetly in his tiny apartment while dinner cooked in the oven? Nonsense.

     The way he told her that she’ll be his forever and always? Nonsense. 

     Two months could dish out a lot of pain; Eve knew firsthand since Kyle did so enjoy showing off his new girlfriend. 

    “Scoot over.” His girlfriend-Autumn-towered over Eve, her blonde ringlets tamed into a neat braid. 

     She swallowed slowly, knowing where her boundaries lay as she made room for her, crossing one ankle over the other.

   Eve came out of respect.

   Obligation.

   But not for love; never again would she fall into the trap of sweet talk and promises. 

   People lied. They put up a facade for the foolhardy and trustworthy. 

   Her fingers curl against her lap as more people begin to enter the already crowded room, feeling as small and as trapped as a mouse. Being caged in was never a pastime of hers, but lately, she has lived the life of a ghost. How could it be that a single person could have such a strong hold over her?

     Steal the air from her lungs months later despite them calling it quits.

     Make her heart stutter inside her chest.

     Make her miss the warmth that their embrace always provided, like the most coziest of quilts wrapping against her frame.

      She was the first to say I love you, and he was the first to call it quits. 

      This pain was new, agonzing. A twisting sensation low in her gut.

      She cleared her throat, suddenly uncomfortable. “Excuse me.”

      His girlfriend snorts, rolling her eyes. “You won’t be missed. Believe me. Take your time.” 

      Heat stained her cheeks as she practically ran out of the room and back outside, where the rain continued to pour. Droplets alight on her cheeks, mixing with the briny salt of her tears. They reminded her of tiny crystallized pieces, shimmery and radiant. 

     She sniffled, blinking up at the hazy sky, wondering where everything went wrong and shattered at the seams. “I’m sorry. Even though I know it is not my fault, I still feel like it is.”

***

Two weeks later…

The library became her refuge, a place of hope and promises amid a beacon of darkness.

    Kyle was no longer here.

    No longer smiling, laughing, enjoying life the way that he should. 

    “What did you want me to do? I’ve known Autumn for years.”

     “You could have fought for me, Kyle, just like you promised.”

      “Please, we don’t live in a world penned by an author’s touch, always leading to a happy ending.” 

      “But we could.”

       Eve snapped back into reality, her fingers once clasped around the spine of a book having nearly slipped away.

         She took in a sharp breath.

         Exhaled.

         Repeated the action.

         That was nothing more than a memory, a reminder of the thorn that Kyle left behind in her heart. 

        “Need a little help, Miss?”

         She froze, clutching the book against her chest as if it were a lifeline. Her gaze scanned the rows and rows of shelves, curiosity gnawing at her until-

         There.  

         Less than a foot away stood a perfect stranger, haloed by the glow of fading sunlight. He offered up a patient smile, pointing to the badge clipped onto the corner of his shirt. “Mind you, in this library, we try to avoid nearly dropping books at all costs.” 

        Her cheeks flushed as she gently placed the book back in its proper position on the shelf. “Sorry.” 

        He shrugged. “Happens to the best of us. Now, what can I help you with?”

        Eve pretended to ponder the question, though all she secretly wanted was to grab a stack from her favorite author and rush home at all costs.

         Before thoughts of Kyle could swarm back in.

         Before her heart betrayed her for the hundredth time. 

         She cleared her throat. “Definitely something with fantasy.”

         He offered her a smile, welcoming and kind. “Ah, one of those who enjoys getting lost in the art of storytelling?”

        “Yes, no doubt about it.”

           As he led her down the next aisle, she couldn’t help but notice that the stray droplets glistening on the windowpane from the recent rainstorm created a beautiful rainbow that slanted inside.