Do you see what I see

Black boots crushed the gravel beneath them with each step along the desolate highway. With the August sun on his back, Deputy Sheriff Henry Lee Jones cast not only a large shadow on the Nissan Maxima he was approaching, but on all the residents of Harrison County. He adjusted his aviator style sunglasses on his pale white face that had the texture of sandpaper. As he approached the driver side window, his dark blue eyes scanned the interior of the car. He noticed a black man with dreadlocks in the driver seat, and a female companion with her hair in a ponytail in the passenger’s seat. Henry unbuttoned his holster and had his right hand hovering over his service revolver. As he leaned over and got a good look, he realized the female passenger had her phone out recording him.

           “License and registration,” Henry Lee commanded.

           The driver scrunched his face, handed the officer the documents and asked, “What are you pulling me over for?”

           “The tint on your vehicle is too dark,” he replied looking over his license.

“Tinted windows! Wow,” the driver said shaking his head with a sarcastic grin.

“The law is the law,” Henry Lee said, “Where you heading?”

           Annoyed, the lady interjected, “Why does that matter? If you going give us a ticket, just give us a ticket.”

           “Ma’am, I’m in the middle of an investigation. I need you to put down your phone and place your hands on the dashboard where I can see them,” Henry Lee snapped.

           Confused, the driver asked, “What investigation? I didn’t do anything.”

           “You broke the law sir. And you two are acting suspicious. Now, do you have any drugs or guns in the vehicle?”

           “No,” the driver said in frustration.”

           Refusing to put down her phone and stop recording, the lady took off her seatbelt, leaned forward in her seat. Her dark brown eyes looked like they could burn a hole through Henry Lee. She cocked her head to the side and asked, “What does any of this have to do with tinted windows?” 

           “Ma’am, I’m only going to tell you this one last time. Put down that phone and place your hands on the dashboard,” Henry Lee said raising his voice and adding inflection while pointing to the dashboard.   

           “I’m not putting down my phone. I know my rights,” she yelled in anger. “What’s your badge number and the name of your supervisor?”

            Henry Lee unhooked his radio and hit the talk button, “Control, the is unit 856. I have a 38.03 in progress. Officer needs assistance.” He pulled out his gun and pointed it at the driver. “I’m placing you two under arrest. Take your keys out the ignition and toss them out the window! Then get out the car with your hands up! Slowly.”

           The couple looked at each other in shock. “What are you arresting us for?”

           “Refusing to obey orders. Now get out the car!” Henry yelled.

           The driver took the keys out the ignition and tossed them on the street. He unbuckled his seatbelt and opened the car door to get out. Then the lady extended her left arm restricting his movement. “You don’t have to go nowhere, baby. We have rights. We want to speak to a supervisor.”

           “Get out the car, now!” Henry Lee shouted inching closer.

           They both sat there, with the lady continuing to record.

“One last time, get out the car!” Henry Lee screamed as he moved closer and grabbed the man’s arm trying to forcibly remove him. The woman grabbed his other arm trying to help him stay in. It was a tug-of-war. Henry Lee pressed his weapon against the man’s chest continuing to shout. The man jerked his arm away from his grip. His momentum carried him toward the console. When Henry saw his left hand touch the bottom of the console where you open it, he fired. Two shots to the chest. In shock, the driver grabbed his chest and stared at Henry Lee while sliding down in his seat.

“Oh my god! Are you fucking crazy! You shot him!” The lady screamed at top the top of her voice. She set her phone down and grabbed the man’s face. Tears streaming down her eyes. Her voice and her soul cried out, “Jerome! Baby! You okay?”

Henry Lee quickly went to the other side of the car. He yanked the door open and snatched her out the vehicle as she kicked and screamed. He wrapped his burly hands around the back of her neck and slammed her head into the hot pavement. As he twisted her arms to put the cuffs on, he said, “I told you to get out the damn vehicle! You people never listen! You need to learn respect for authority.”

Henry Lee dragged her to his patrol car and tossed her in the back seat. Putting his revolver back in its holster, he took off his glasses and surveyed the scene. A few cars drove by slowly, but none of them stopped. At the next exit was a gas station. A couple of people stood out front trying to see what was going on, but they kept their distance. Henry Lee strutted back over to the car. A look of disdain on his face. He didn’t bother to check the wounded man’s vital signs or render aid of any kind. He just exhaled and picked up his radio again, “Control, this is unit 856 again. There was an officer involved shooting. You might want send an ambulance with that backup.”

Henry Lee stood over the driver and looked down at him coldly. Watching as the man gasped for air. Seconds later his life force left his body. 

Two weeks later Henry Lee enter the office of Clarence Jackson. The first black man to be elected sheriff of Harrison County. Clarence was a lot like Henry Lee, tall, stocky, and a good ole country boy that grew up around the way. They even went to school together and played football for the state champion tigers. Henry Lee took a seat and stared at his dark skinned, grey-hair boss.

With a stoic look on his face, Clarence held a file in his hand. He tossed on his desk and announced, “Internal Affairs cleared the shooting. The DA won’t be charging you, and you have been cleared to return to active duty as of Monday morning.”

Henry Lee smiled as he picked up the file and looked over it. “I knew it was a good shoot.” 

“Looks like you got a lot of friends in the right places,” Clarence said with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

Henry Lee stood up with his chest poked out and an arrogant look on his face. He locked eyes with Clarence and warned, “Well Clarence, like I’ve always told you. This is my town, and these are my people. You might do well to remember that.”

Clarence rose to his feet as well. He put his hands on his desk and leaned forward to get into Henry Lee’s face and replied, “These people can’t see you for who you really are, but I can. And regardless what that bullshit report said. We both know the truth.”

“The truth is, these ghetto, hip-hop thugs better learn to do as their told, or stay the hell out of Harrison County.”

Clarence closed his eyes and shook his head in disgust. “That kid you shot, Jerome Johnson. He just graduated college with an engineering degree. He volunteered at the homeless shelter on the weekends. And he was an usher at his church. But hey, all black guys are thugs, right.”

“The law is the law. If he followed my instructions, he’d be alive,” Henry Lee responded shooting Clarence a cold glare.

Clarence stood up straight and soften his voice, “Damn it Henry, it’s tinted windows. Tinted windows! That shouldn’t cost a kid his life. What if it were your kid?”

“My son doesn’t break the law,” Henry Lee said with a smirk as he snatched up his paperwork and left the office without a drop of remorse.

Henry Lee hopped in his truck, tossed the file in the backseat, and drove home. He stepped inside his shotgun style house to find his son, Jesse, in the kitchen fixing himself a sandwich. Running into the kitchen, Henry Lee bear hugged Jesse and playfully lifted him off the floor. “How’s my boy?”

“You’re in a good mood,” Jesse said with a crooked smile.

“You’re damn right. I was cleared of that shooting. I’m back to work,” Henry Lee said as he put down his skinny little boy. Then he rubbed Jesse’s baby face like normal. Teasing him because he didn’t have enough hair to shave yet.

 “That’s great news, pop,” Jesse said shaking his hand. “You should have never been suspended in the first place.”

“Damn right,” Henry Lee said as cracked opened the refrigerator and grabbed a cold beer. He unbuttoned his shirt, scratched his balls, and took a swig. “So, what you been up to today?”

“Remember I told you that I had an interview,” Jesse replied trying to hold back a smile.

“Oh yeah. How did it go?”

Jesse’s grey eyes lit up and he held out his arms and announced, “You’re looking at the new associate for Bradford and Stratton.”

“That’s my boy,” Henry Lee said proudly, pulling Jesse into a hug. He put his hands on his shoulders, “First you graduated from college. Now you got the career you always wanted. I’m so proud of you, son.”

“Thanks pop.”

“Well, it’s been a long day. I’m go kick back and relax. You going anywhere?”

“I don’t think so,” Jesse said with a shrug.

With that response, Henry Lee went into the living room continuing to drink his beer. He plopped down on the couch watching the evening news. After a couple of more beers, he dosed off. Suddenly, at three o’clock in the morning his phone rang. Shaking off the cobwebs, he answered, “Yeah.”

“Henry, you better get down here. There’s been an incident with your son,” said Clarence on the other end of the line.

“What are you talking about? Jesse is here,” Henry replied getting off the couch and stumbling to his feet. He called out, “Jesse! Jesse!” No answer. He went to window and looked for Jesse’s car in the driveway. It was gone. Scratching the back of head in confusion, Henry Lee put the phone back to his face and said, “What happened with my son?”

“I’ll explain it to you when you get here,” Clarence said.

“The hell with that, just tell me what happened.”

There was a long pause before Clarence finally answered, “Jesse was shot….”

Before Clarence could finish his sentence, Henry Lee had dropped the phone, grabbed his keys, and was in his pickup truck heading to police headquarters. Breath reeking of beer and hair uncombed, Henry Lee barged into Clarence’s office. He got in Clarence’s face and demanded to know what happened.

Clarence eyes were looking everywhere, except at Henry Lee. Clarence swallowed hard before the words slowly creeped out his mouth, “Jesse was pulled over by highway patrol in Johnson county. Something happened during the stop. He was shot. I’m sorry….”

Henry Lee’s legs buckled as an unspeakable pain over took his body. Crippling him with grief. His mouth was moving, but no words came out. It was like he was searching for words but couldn’t find any. Clarence grabbed his arms and helped him into one of the armchairs. He gave Henry Lee a compassionate touch on the shoulder. Henry Lee started to hyperventilate. In between each breath, he managed to push out the words, “My boy is dead?”

“I’m so sorry, Henry,” Clarence uttered with his head bowed.

The tears started streaming down his closed eyes. He leaned forward and buried his head in his hands. His voice began to tremble as he said, “I don’t understand. He’s a good kid. He just graduated from college. He had a bright future. How could this happen?”

“I asked the Johnson County Sheriff for a copy of the vest camera. He says he’s sending it over soon as it’s processed,” Clarence added.

“I’m not leaving this office until I see that footage.”

Over the next few hours Clarence was working the phones trying to expedite that footage. He called in every favor. He spoke to everyone from the mayor to the governor to get a copy of that video. And true to his word, Henry Lee never moved from that chair in Clarence’s office. He just sat there with a catatonic look on his face. Finally, about nine am the next morning, the footage arrived by special carrier. Clarence pulled out a laptop and put in the flash drive. Then he pulled up a seat next to Henry Lee and pushed play on the video.

The black officer walked up to the side of Jesse’s truck and tapped on the window. Jesse rolled it down. The officer said, “Good evening. License and registration please.”

Jesse had an annoyed look on his face as he reached into the glove compartment and retrieved the documents. Handing them to the officer, Jesse said, “Why you pull me over?”

The officer pulled out a flashlight and shined it into the car as he took the documents, “You failed to signal when changing lanes.”

“Failed to signal! Wow,” Jesse said shaking his head with a sarcastic chuckle.

“The law is the law, sir. And you broke it. Do you have any guns or drugs in the vehicle?”

“No!” Jesse snapped, rolling his eyes.   

Shining the light under the seats the cop asked, “Where you heading?”

“Why? What does this have to do with me failing to signal?”

“Because you’re acting very suspicious. Like you have something to hide.”

“Something to hide! I didn’t do anything. Unreal. I’m calling my father,” Jesse said as turned on the interior light. He opened his consul to retrieve his phone.  

“Sir, I’m a need you to calm down. Matter of fact, take your keys out the ignition and keep your hands on the steering wheel where I can see them,” the officer commanded.

Agitated, Jesse ignored the order and continued to search for the phone as he said, “If you’re going to give me a ticket, just give me the ticket.”

“I’m conducting an investigation, and I gave you an order that you’re required to follow.” The officer said more firmly, “Now, take the keys out the ignition and keep your hands on the steering wheel where I can see them.”

“This is bullshit!” Jesse snapped finally pulling out his phone, “I want your badge number and the name of your supervisor. My father is a cop. I know my rights.”

Stoic, the officer took out his walkie-talkie and said, “Dispatch, the is unit 56. I have a 38.03 in progress. Officer needs assistance.” The officer unbuttoned his holster, pulled out his 9mm and aimed it at Jesse. Then he shined the light in Jesse’s face and ordered, “Sir, you are under arrest for refusal to comply with my commands. Drop the phone. Get out the car with your hands up, slowly.”

Jesse looked at the cop in disbelief before finally replying, “I can’t believe this. I didn’t do anything.”

“Sir, I’m going to need you to get out the car. Now!” The officer shouted.

“I’m not going anywhere until I speak to your supervisor.”

The officer yanked the door open and grabbed Jesse by the arm. Jesse resisted. A violent scuffle ensued as Jesse twist and turned to avoid getting pulled out the truck. Then Jesse reached across the car, maybe to grab the other door handle, or maybe to reach into the glove compartment. It didn’t matter. Because soon as he made the motion, the officer shot him in the chest.

Henry was furious after watching the footage. He picked up the laptop and slammed it into the floor. “I WANT THAT MOTHERFUCKER’S ASS!”

“I know, but please try to stay calm,” Clarence said with his palms down, slowly moving closer.

           “He didn’t have to kill him! He could have just given him the damn ticket!”

           “That’s not what you said before.”

            “What?” Henry Lee said looking confused. Clarence’s words temporarily snapped him out of his anger.

Clarence got up slowly and took a deep breath. He rubbed his chin and calmly revealed, “That traffic stop looked identical to the one you had. I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but he responded the same way you did. Remember what you said, the law is the law. If he did as he was told, he’d be alive. It looks like your son was in the same scenario.

Henry Lee shook his head in denial and said, “But this is different. This my son.”

“I know,” Clarence said shaking his head in agreement, “But, Jerome Johnson was somebody’s son too. And when I met with that family, they wanted your ass just like you want his.”

Henry Lee bit down on his bottom lip and closed his eyes in disgust. For the first time in his career, in his life, Henry Lee finally saw things from the other side. The faces of all police victims he ever seen or read about, from George Floyd to Sandra Bland, resonated with him. He remembered the faces of their families on the evening news. He remembered the tears in the eyes of the mothers, fathers, siblings, and friends. He now had those same tears. Their pain was now his pain. Their anger was his anger. Their outrage was his outrage. Sitting there for what seemed an eternity, it finally hit him. When he opened his eyes again, he looked at Clarence. And with a magnanimous voice he proclaimed, “I get it.”        

                                               The End