Stuck In The Middle

Have you every realized you made a mistake and wondered how you were going to fix it? That’s me in a nutshell Jamie the let’s just be friends. Hey, how have you been?

Here I am in my late 20s and no man yet. Hometown Akron, Ohio birthname Nakomis. My best time is when I’m with my friend Jamie. Okay I guess.

I still owe you that kiss I promised so you can be mines.

Jamie kisses me, and I pull away even though I don’t want him to stop. He makes it so hard for me to think. Jamie, why are you doing this?

Maybe its wishful thinking.

If only - Sure and only have you for a day or two a week. No, thank you. I want someone I can love every day. Looking towards the door I see my heart’s desire.an Indian named Tyson. Always. Hey, is that the guy? Man, he’s an Indian version of me.

Yeah, that’s him. I went back to doing my inventory until I heard Jamie and Tyson talking. I was so shocked I couldn’t concentrate. I stroll over to Jamie smiling, so when is the show? Jamie you owe me a dance.

Show is at 7, but dinner at 6.Tyson and a friend arrived at the club just in time to see Road Burn as the black limo pulls up. Smiling Jamie steps out and turns to me reaching his hand out I grab it. Looking over to the bar I see Tyson and Jamie talking again. The bands start to play, and people start to dance. Jamie comes over and grabs my hand. Jamie and I are on the dance floor for two songs. He moves his hands further down my back. Sudden its over and I find myself in Tyson’s arms. Tyson places his hands on my waist and begins to pull me closer to him. As he holds me he says, Can you forgive me? We’ll see is all I can say.

The song ends, and we go our separate ways. I began to dance as my mind wanders and wish anybody would dance with me. Jamie begins to comfort me and tells me to let him hold me. Pausing for a moment. I began to nod my okay to him. Even though the song only lasted for five minutes it feels like more. As I hear the announcer calls the band to the stage. Returning to a friend’s house. As the movie played I realized I felt to relaxed around Jamie. I’m warm and dreaming I’m with Jamie, so I open my eyes. Holding me Jamie says, Hi, are you okay? You were shaking so I wrapped my arms around you. I wish we were alone.

I’m okay. Why alone I say. His response was pulling me closer to him as are lips met. Lost in the moment I kiss him back. Jamie grabs my waist and have me straddle him. It feels like he lit a fire with in as he caresses my ass. Unable to believe we stop. The next morning, I was a blur.

Hey Nakomis wake up. Nothing happens as our friends and others enter the room. Call 911, she’s not breathing. As Amy and the others waited for the ambulance Jamie did CPR on me. Stay with us. Always - please stay.

           I felt terrible, but I slowly opened my eyes. Still collecting my thoughts as we wait. I wake to Jamie holding my hand on the way. Hours later I wake to see  Jamie in the doorway. Jamie enters with a How are you feeling? I thought I lost you. I mean we lost you. How long will you have to stay? I hoarsely say just overnight.

           About 4 hours later I wake up to see someone sleep in the chair. It’s to dark to tell who it is. I can see is a dragon tattoo on the left forearm. As morning comes so do I heal. Not thirty minutes later I get a text.

Unknown, Can we meet for coffee about 3 p.m.?

Fine. Who is this? There was no answer. My phone pings it’s a text from Jamie.

Hey how are you doing?

I’m fine. Will I see you soon my – If only?

I have to work, but I’ll find time. Always.

The text end and I take a short nap. Arriving at El Café’ to meet my blind date I sit quietly as 2:50 p.m. rolls around. As I sip my coffee a text comes in.

Wish I was there.

Me too Jamie. How’s work?

Dragging on. I need a vacation. You want to come? What are you doing?

Maybe. Waiting at a coffee shop for a blind date.

I better get back. Goodbye - Always.

Goodbye, J.

Hey, I wanted to take you out for coffee and apologize for the way I treated at the concert. Can we start over?

Sure. Time has passed, and it has been two months since that day. Tyson and I have been dating, but something does not seem right. Wednesday afternoon Undertaker theme song plays as my phone rings. Hello.

What are you doing tonight? I have tickets to the Diner Movie theater at 4.

I have nothing. See you in 15.

           Everything was great and Even though there was an arm rest between us. Jamie leans over to ask me to come to his concert on Friday. After saying yes, he steals a kiss from me. A part of me wanted to kiss him back. Jamie, the movie.

Always - For the record you didn’t push me away.

Friday night at the concert was awesome as usual. Road Burn plays first, and the crowd goes wild. As I dance to their songs a guy walks up and forces me to dance with him. The next band gets on stage and Jamie saves me from this guy. After telling him I don’t want to a fight breaks out. The guy pushes me, the next thing I know Jamie punches him. The guy is thrown out of the club.

Thanking Jamie as he takes me to a dark dance floor. It has just enough light for you to see who you are dancing with. A slow song starts to play I step to the right to get off the dance floor. Jamie stops me and takes me in his arms. Looking into his teal colored eyes I see something that wasn’t there before. He pulls me close, I find myself in between him and the wall. Jamie kisses my forehead and makes his way to my lips. The only thing that is stopping him is, because we are in public.

           As Jamie’s hands travel down my body I moan, and he continues. He moves me to the back table that sits in the darkness. As we kiss he begins to explore my body again. Suddenly Undertaker theme song plays. Jamie, I have to answer my phone.

No, you don’t. You can stay with me and dance. If it’s him don’t answer he’s lying to you.

Looking at my phone I see Tyson calling. My phone pings a text comes up and says his flight was cancelled. Be back Monday. I guess we should go home.

           I hate to bring this up, but I have nowhere to stay I promise to behave.

           After calling a taxi and arriving at a sky blue and teal Victorian house. Total silence from Jamie and the Taxi driver. Jamie breaks the silence.

So why do you need this Tyson guy?

For a companion. I think I want more.

Well how about me? Give me a chance. Jamie’s phone chimes saying he has received a text. Looking at his phone he sees a man kissing a woman. Gasping he realizes its Tyson. I hate to do this, but you need to see this.

What? After showing the picture to me I could only deny it. When Jamie received video proof of them going into hotel room. I just.

Are you okay? Stupid question you’re not. You go clear your head and I’ll pick a movie out for us. I promise I wont leave until you say.

Jamie finds a movie to watch and helps himself to the kitchen. As I take my shower I se my life flash before my eyes. Still holding on to the belief the picture and video was a lie. I hold on to my feelings for Tyson. Looking into the mirror I visualize myself with Tyson and then Jamie. What am I thinking Jamie is my friend. I don’t have feelings for him. Right. Returning to the living room Jamie picked a classic, True Grit. As Jamie opens his arms he wraps me up like he’s my blanket. Oh, God why does this man make me feel so good. Should I give him a chance. No, I’m with Tyson.

It has been two months since that night. Now it is May 3rd a Friday night which means concert time. I’m still not sure what I need anymore. Arriving at the club VIP style are Jamie and me. As always he insists on a dance which I agree to. After Road Burn sings their two songs. It’s time for other business, before that happens Tyson walks in holding some chick in his arms. Jamie see’s them and ask the DJ or Band to play a slow song. I hadn’t the situation until I saw them with my own eyes.

           I don’t care your mines now and this is good for us. I know you want this.

They start dancing with the chick and decides to kiss her. That was the last straw. Tyson we need to talk now. You know what never mind. I’m done with you. You can have him.

Well. I thought you would cling to him. Besides, you will never do better than him.

Surprisingly, Jamie had my back as we walked away and as the slow song started Jamie took pleasure in holding me. He gently kissed my lips and the progress to a passionate kiss. Pushing him away he stops.

Now what’s wrong? We can leave if that helps. Finally, we decided to leave. The ride was quiet, and Jamie was being himself. Okay, we have to talk. You know how I feel about you. When you make your choice, I will be waiting.

 The taxi arrives at my house and I step out. Jamie pays the taxi driver and meets me inside. I go to the kitchen and pour two glasses of water. My mind plays out every moment he has made me feel loved. While Jamie was in the bathroom I received a picture from Tyson begging me to take him back. Tears began to fill in my eyes and my heart begins to break. Jamie walks back in the kitchen says nothing at first.

Nakomis I’m sorry. What can I do? Jamie places the popcorn in the microwave. With my head still down and crying Jamie makes his choice. I know this is a bad time, but I meant what I said. I want you. There is nothing holding you back now.

The microwave dings -  Jamie removes the popcorn. As we go sit on the couch, he turns the TV on, and takes my hand. Do you love me? Just tell me you want more from me. So, what is it?”

Jamie I do want more, but I’m afraid. Looking at Jamie’s left arm I realize something that means a lot to me. Jamie has a dragon tattoo. You stayed with me at the hospital. Why did you stay?

I had to. I thought I had lost my soulmate. I didn’t want you to be alone. Let me guess you don’t want me now. Jamie puts his head in his hands. He sighs as if his whole world is gone. As I feel my heart pound in my chest I stand up and make my choice. Standing in front of Jamie I lift his head up. Looking into his teal colored eyes I lean forward and kiss him. Thank you for everything. You are my soul mate. – If Only. Always - And you are mines. I’m sorry I tested you. Jamie pulls me closer as I straddle him. We begin kissing slowly then passionately. As he explores my body Jamie unbuttons my shirt and slips my skirt off.

           Guessing from his smile he likes what he sees. My turn. Pulling his shirt over his head and unbuttoning his jeans our emotions are getting intense. As I touch his rock-hard body I’m getting turned on even more. Jamie is losing control. Unable to control himself Jamie stands up and carry me to the bedroom. As Jamie is carrying me I begin to kiss him. He stops and holds me against the wall. I want him so bad rather, we want each other. Once in my bedroom he lays me down while laying over top of me. He asks me..

           You still haven’t answered my question. If your wondering – always is mines. As hard as I haven been fighting you will be my – if only forever. I love you. Smiling Jamie kisses me, and we end this bad night in each other’s arms. It’s Saturday morning and still half asleep I roll over into Jamie’s arms. I slowly open my eyes.

Good morning my soulmate? Good morning Jamie. How long have you been up?

Long enough for me to watch you toss and turn. I have a surprise for you. Can you be ready in fifteen minutes? A half hour later we arrive at “What Ever You Desire” clothing store. I wanted to show how much I love you. There on a gold hanger was a black and red lace dress. Jamie walks away with the clerk in search of jewelry and shoes to go with the dress. While I was l fixing my hair, Jamie walks up behind me. I like this picture I wish it were true this is perfect for you. After placing it in my hands I cry. I love it a sword with a red rose on it.

 Thirteen months later June 3 this day is finally here. I have chosen a partner and today it will be final. Even though, Jamie asked me seven months ago we decided today would be that day. We wanted to give our friends more time to save money. The wedding started at 3 p.m. and by 4 I was Mrs. Jamie Knight. We kissed and walked out of the church. As we walked to the limo rice was thrown over us.

So, my love how does it feel to be Mrs. Jamie Knight? I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time. I want to cherish this night forever. I just want tonight to be perfect. As long as I’m with you it’s perfect Jamie. I will love you for eternity. If only was my way of saying I love you. I love you too. Also known as I always.

Arriving at the Holiday Inn Jamie kisses me before getting out of the limo. Jamie takes me right to our room for the next week. Walking up to room 147 Jamie unlocks the door and carries me over the thresh hold. Looking over at the table in the room is Welch’s Sparkling Grape Juice, strawberries, grapes, and dipping chocolate. As Jamie slowly unbuttons his shirt and reveals his rock-hard body. He begins to tease me by taking a strawberry and ruby his lips with it. Unable take it any more I find myself undressing and my lips on his.

           Alright you know you taste better than the strawberry. I’m glad to hear that, but you still have a slip on. Here let me take that off and any other clothes Jamie was wearing. Jamie took his time loving me that night. In March we found out we where parents to be. My due date is December 5. It’s Thursday, December 2 at 9:30 a.m. Jamie had already left for work. Ten minutes later I had Jamie and the God parents on speaker.

           Guys I’m in labor. All I heard was, I’m pulling into the driveway see you in a minute. Always. All I can do is the breathing exercises right now. The contractions are ten minutes apart, but by the time we get to the hospital its 5. I have been in labor for two hours now. The time is 12:31 p.m. our son Mikhal Knight was born weighing in at 8 lbs. 5 oz., and 21 1/2 inches long. Holding his son for the first time Jamie smiles from ear to ear. Let’s  enjoy the moment.

That was about six years and two months ago. Mikhal is now 6 with Razzberry ice colored hair and has two siblings. A lot has changed for the better. Our daughter Ami was born October 15. Ami is 4 years old and has Razzberry blond hair. Next came Draco on August 18 with maple sugar hair. Draco just turned 3 and boy is he bad.

Life has been good to us. Jamie and I have been married for seven years. Our children keep us young and help us remember just how much we love each other. Today our oldest asked his Dad if he loved me. Jamie jus said one single word, Always. Mommy What does that mean? Mikhal, Always is your father’s way of saying ,I love you. He has been saying that for the past nine years. I just didn’t realize how much.

An energized Ami says, Mommy, can me and Draco go outside? Little Draco response please. Stay out back. Wait we’ll all go. A picnic sounds good. Love you guys. The Knight family prepares for their picnic and head outside for some fun.