The Perfect Holiday

Thursday 2pm

Hi Margaret, just a quick e-mail to let you know we have arrived safely. Centreparcs is much posher than I expected. Not like Butlins at all. Dread to think how much it is costing. But I’m so glad they persuaded me to come. Offered to babysit the boys this evening so Clare and Simon can go for dinner at one of the restaurants. Will be so lovely to spend some quality time with the boys. Looking forward to reading them bedtime stories. This is just the relaxing break that I needed after such a busy time. I wish we could stay here forever. So peaceful! Love, Joan.

PS. Don’t forget to put my recycling bin out tomorrow morning. They usually come to collect them about 9.30. Could you pop in a couple of the old Daily Mails that I left by the fridge in the kitchen? And there might be an empty cardboard tube from the kitchen roll on the kitchen table, behind the coffee jars.

Friday 8am

Wonderful to spend a whole evening with the boys. Noah is so clever. He will end up being a Professor at somewhere like Cambridge. Never stops asking questions and I couldn’t get him to fall asleep till almost 11. Jonah is much quieter. Was playing on his iPad all evening. I expect he will become a scientist and discover a cure for dementia. I had a lovely night’s sleep. The beds are so comfortable. Almost like being at home. We are going to spend time today exploring! I’m hoping to put some photos on Facebook so you will be able to see how beautiful this place is here. This feels like paradise. Just what I need after the last few months. Love, Joan.

PS. Just another reminder about the recycling bin. You could pop round now if you didn’t have time yesterday evening. They are supposed to come round at 9.30 but it is often 9.45 or 9.50 by the time they actually turn up. If there are any leaflets through the door, please stick them straight in the bin. I never order takeaway pizzas and I certainly won’t be ordering any while I am here.

Saturday 9am

Spent the whole of Friday looking after the boys. Clare and Simon wanted to make the most of the sporting facilities here and I was happy to look after the boys. They are wonderful but I’m exhausted. In the morning I took the boys swimming while Clare and Simon were cycling. In the afternoon I took the boys cycling while Clare and Simon went swimming. A tiring day but it will be worth it when the boys are representing GB at the Olympics. Love, Joan.

PS. Have a feeling that I left a library book by the sofa in the sitting room. It might be under the old copy of the Radio Times. If it needs to go back to the library, can you pop it back to them please. You are an angel. Thanks for everything.

Sunday 11am

There’s been a crisis at Simon’s work. They have a new IT system and it is taking longer to bed in than anyone expected. So he has had to go back this morning and Clare went back with him to share the driving. They have asked me to look after the boys till they come back here on Wednesday. Am excited and thankful they trust me to look after two such wonderful boys. I can’t believe my luck. But they will certainly keep me on my toes. Love, Joan.

PS. I’m not sure if I left enough food for the tropical fish. If we have run out, could you pop into town and get some from the pet shop. Not the most expensive one. I can refund you when I get back. And you don’t need to put the old copy of the Radio Times on the coffee table by the fish-tank in the recycling yet as I haven’t finished reading it.

Monday 9am

Am tired out. Both of the boys didn’t want to go to sleep till 3am. They wanted to stay up and play pirates. The family next door complained and it was a bit embarrassing. Have also realised that Jonah isn’t using his iPad for what I thought he was using it for. So I tried to confiscate it but he just started crying and so I had to give in. Love, Joan.

PS. Can you double-check that the timer on the central heating is working? I just want it coming on for an hour in the evening to take the chill off the house. It should come on at 7.45pm and go off at 8.45pm. I know you don’t normally pop round in the evening but I’d be so grateful if you could vary your routine this evening. Many thanks. And while you are there can you check one other thing for me. There is a cactus plant on the window-ledge of the downstairs toilet. If it looks like it needs a drop of water, could you oblige. Many thanks. I don’t know what I’d do without you.

Tuesday 9am

Jonah has thrown his iPad into the swimming pool. He and Noah got into a fight with two other boys. A kind lifeguard managed to fish the iPad out but I can’t get it to work. Then in the afternoon we almost had a fire in our accommodation. I must have nodded off for two minutes but fortunately the smell of burning in the kitchen woke me up. Neither of the boys owned up to it. Love, Joan.

Wednesday 10am

Too tired to write much today. Love, Joan

Thursday 8.30am

I was expecting Clare and Simon to come back yesterday. But I obviously got hold of the wrong end of the stick. They meant next Wednesday not this Wednesday. So I have to look after them for another week, which is lovely. But when I eventually get home next week I think I will need a holiday to recover. Love, Joan.