Dwell Time

“Thanks for coming to get me.”

“No problem. What happened?”

“I don't know. It smells like burnt rubber. My headlights kept dimming. It's kind of creepy. It just makes a funny clicking sound whenever I turn the key. It won't start at all now. I guess the battery's dead.”

“Doesn't sound good. Lemme take a look.”

“Yeah. She ain't going nowhere for awhile. Lemme hook 'er up and we'll tow 'er home. Prob'ly the alternator. I told you it was goin'.”

“Well, that figures. Can you fix it?” 

“Maybe. We'll see.”

“Ok.”

“The train's comin'. We should hurry up or we'll get stuck.”

“I know. That's why I'm here.”

“Yeah, I figured. You always watch the train graffiti when you're upset. So, what's wrong?”

“Here it comes!”

“Looks like a long one. Guess we're stuck here for awhile. Plenty of time for you to tell me what's wrong.”

“I love train tags. Can you imagine doing all that detail—that big—super fast, so you don't get caught and arrested?”

“Yeah, I never really noticed 'em 'til you showed me.”

“Look at that one—WOLF PACK.”

“Abby, what's going on? We need to talk. Where were you tonight? You didn't answer your phone.”

“LOST.”

“LOST?”

“Well, I was reading the tag, but, yeah, I do feel LOST lately. For awhile now.”

“HONEY, it's prob'ly your depression actin' up again. Have you talked to your therapist?”

“Why do you always blame everything on that? I can have normal feelings just like everyone else! When I'm excited about something, you think I'm MANIK, when I say I feel LOST, you tell me I'm depressed! Why can't I just feel LOST for the heck of it? Maybe I'm just LOST, Donald!”

“Ok, ok. I'm sorry. I just don't understand that. I don't get LOST. I'm just here.”

“Maybe that's part of the problem.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“GLITCH.”

“What? I don't--”

“You act like something's wrong with me and that everything you do is just fine. But, everything you do is boring. You're always the same. I don't think that's normal, Donnie!”

“Thanks. Thanks a lot for that. So, now I'm boring.”

“STRANGE.”

“Oh, ok, so I'm STRANGE now too and it's somehow my fault you're so LOST?”

“CUR.”

“What?”

“The train. Look. CUR.”

“LISTEN. I LOVE you, Abby. I just don't know what to do to make you happy. I work hard. I make money for you. I hold you when you're sad. I calm you down when you're upset. I'm always there for you. What do you want?”

“SPAIN.”

“You know I been savin' up. It'll just take a little more time. If I keep workin' overtime at the garage--”

“No. Train. SPAIN.”

“Oh. Would you please stop readin' the graffiti and talk to me?”

“VERB.”

“Stallin'! Again! You always change the subject so you can stall when we fight. I know it's so you don't have to tell me what's really wrong. I hate it!”

“MASK.”

“Stop it! You never LISTEN!”

“You don't even know me!”

“We been together for almost seven years! Of course I know you!”

“OATH.”

“Well, now, you know we plan to get married someday. That's on you. You said you weren't ready. How about we get married right afore we go to SPAIN? That'll be our honeymoon.”

“MET.”

“MET?”

“I've MET someone, Donnie.”

“MET someone?”

“ECKOER.”

“Who is he? How did you meet someone? I mean— I mean, where? Who is this CREEP?”

“His name is Jamie. He's not a CREEP. He's a sculptor. An artist, like me.”

“An artist?”

“At therapy.”

“What, your therapist fixed you up?”

“JERK.”

“I'm sorry, Abby, I just don't get it. A sculptor?”

“What's wrong with a sculptor? I'm a painter and you've never had a problem with that.”

“He sculpts a lot of nudes.”

“LAME.”

“It is not! His sculptures are unique, they're beautiful! They—“

“Train. I meant, on the train.”

“Oh.”

“He was in the waiting room with me. I recognized him.”

“From what? Where?”

“Art News.”

“FAN.”

“He famous or somethin'?”

“A little, I guess, in certain circles.”

“You sayin' you're leavin' me for him, then?”

“DROP.”

“Just like that? After all these years we been together?”

“I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you.”

“Too late for that. How'd you 'spect to avoid that?”

“4GET.”

“How could I ever just 4GET you? I LOVE you.”

“SPARE.”

“What? You don't believe me?”

“I believe you. The train.”

“Oh.”

“I LOVE you too.”

“What?”

“I said, 'I LOVE you too!'”

“Sorry. So loud.”

“Then, why?”

“PASS.”

“No! Tell me why! What did I do wrong, SUGR?”

“Nothing. We're just—we aren't a good MATCH, that's all.”

“Please don't GIVUP on me. Let me SHOW you I can do better. Give me another chance.”

“This isn't EAZY for me either, you know. I can't just keep going on like this with you, Donnie. I have to draw the LINE somewhere.”

“You aren't in your right MIND when you're depressed, HONEY, you know that!”

“RUDE.”

“I'm sorry, but it's the truth.”

“SCHIZO.”

“I am not! How dare you! I—“

“Train! Train! Sorry. That ain't what I meant.”

“Oh. I— Oh.”

“DIG.”

“I just thought we had something—a BOND.”

“COOT.”

“I know. The age difference has always caused us TROUBLE, but I thought you were ok with it?”

“What? It doesn't bother me at all.”

“Oh.”

“Oh. Sorry. I was reading the train again. I get distracted. Bright colors, shiny stuff, you know.”

“Yeah. Not the best place to have this kinda' conversation, is it?”

“No. I planned to tell you at home, but, the car...”

“It's always somethin', ain't it?”

“God, I wish this train would hurry up. It smells like a dead animal around here. I can't believe you hang out alone in this place.”

“SPOT.”

“So, did you, um, is that what you been doin' these last coupla' weeks, then?”

“No. I didn't...”

“RISK.”

“SKOR.”

“You been goin' to his place, though?”

“Only his studio.”

“Why?”

“TRICK.”

“What!”

“Posing! I've been posing for one of his sculptures, ok!”

“Naked?”

“FREE.”

“You were, weren't you, Abby?”

“Tell me!”

“Yes.”

“What?”

“Yes! Yes, ok, yes! I've been posing nude for him! It's art, Donnie! It isn't sex! You just don't get it!”

“I don't get why you couldn't tell me, if it ain't sex!”

“Because you would've never let me go! That's how you are—you think you own me!”

“Well, I don't think I own—you, why... I didn't know you thought that about me...”

“SERF.”

“I don't know what to do now. I don't understand anything.”

“SCUE.”

“LOST?”

“Yeah, a little, I guess.”

“KIS.”

“What? You want to—“

“The train.”

“Yeah. Train.”

“REAP. SEW.”

“Is he your age?'

“A couple of years older. Not much.”

“LOSER.”

“Donnie! Oh, yeah. It's hard to see it when I'm crying. All the colors blend together.”

“BLER.”

“I don't want you to go.”

“SNARE.”

“I'll miss watching you paint, you know. I bet you don't know how much I love that, do you?”

“KOAST.”

“EGO.”

“What's he like?”

“10 10 10.”

“He's um, he's a nice guy, Donnie. You'd like him. He's a lot like you, but, but also a lot like me. I think that's what I need right now—someone who understands me, you know?”

“He in therapy for bein' bipolar too, is he?”

“No. Depression. We have a lot in common.”

“UTOPIA.”

“SOBER.”

“What?”

“Train. Were you drunk? When he asked you to pose for him?”

“Of course not, Donnie! God!”

“Hey, it's a fair question. You know how you get when you drink.”

“God, Donnie!”

“I'm sorry.”

“PEACHY.”

“Just look in my EYEZ and tell me you don't want to be with me anymore, Abby.”

“Donnie!”

“Just do it, or I'll never believe you.”

“Ok. I don't want to be with you anymore, Donnie.”

“I ENVE him. He's a lucky man.”

“I'll miss seein' those pretty EYEZ of yours lookin' back at me every mornin'. Like the sky frozen in ice. Always loved starin' into your EYEZ. And runnin' my hands through your shiny, black hair. Remember that time you grew it long? Lord! I couldn't control myself around you!”

“Donnie, I still LOVE you. I still want us to be friends. You've been my best friend for so long. I never want to lose you.”

“Don't get my HOPES up, HONEY. I don't think I can stand it right now.”

“MUST TAKE ALL.”

“I'm so sorry.”

“I'll miss things about you too, you know. The way your clothes smell when you get back from working at the garage. The oil smell and the grease on them always makes me think of painting. All that silver that keeps coming in in your hair, when the sun shines on it...”

“So, where does this leave us?”

“DUST.”

“If it's ok with you, can we still live together until I find another place?”

“Sure. I'm always here for you.”

“I figured you'd just move in with him.”

“We aren't ready for that yet! Don't you remember it took me a full year of us dating before I'd move in with you?”

“Yeah, I just thought he was different, I guess.”

“No. You're very special to me, Donnie. I hope you know that.”

“Maybe. I just don't get it, though. If I was really that special, you wouldn't be leavin' me, now, would you?”

“HAIKU.”

“I love you, Donnie. You don't have to understand. Just accept my love.”

“Train's almost gone. Better hurry up and get back out on the HIWAY.”

“I'm ready for BHED.”

“Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean--”

“I know. It's ok.”

“ Are we really over, Abby? There's nothing I can do?”

“Caboose.”