Science Fair

“Do you feel ready for tomorrow?” asks her mother.

“Ugh… no,” responds an exasperated Li. She’s been dreading tomorrow for months. When the project was first assigned, she’d been SO excited to take this on. It would be vastly different than the usual essays and word problems and reading. A chance to CREATE something! A chance to showcase her creativity and innovation.

But… no. The project’s been a complete disaster. Tomorrow she’ll need to admit this to everyone, all her teachers and fellow students. Her project failed. SHE failed.

“Well, you just got home from school. Why don’t you run up and check on it. Maybe it’s improved? You never know.”

Her mother’s endless optimism can grow annoying. Li’s been working on this for months - it’s highly unlikely everything’s drastically changed just while she was at school.

Li puts her bag away and scrounges for snacks. The project can wait. It’s doomed anyway.

“Can I help you with it?” her mother offers helpfully.

“Nah. Not sure what you can do,” she mutters.

“Well, finish your snack and go do your homework. Early night tonight with the science fair tomorrow, okay?”

“Yeah… okay.”

Li finishes up in the kitchen and makes her way to her room. After changing from her school clothes, she opens her closet and pushes various belongings aside. Sports gear, dirty clothes, art scraps - all shuffled away, as she reaches toward the back for the project.

It’s right where she left it. She tries to remember how many days it’s been since she even checked on it. When the project started, she checked it daily… multiple times a day even. She approached the assignment with such enthusiasm and gusto. But in recent weeks, as it’s become apparent that the whole thing’s not going as planned, she’s only been checking it every few days. What does it even matter?

But there it is, inside her old aquarium. The Project of Doom. The orb floats in the center of the glass container, rotating ever-so-slightly. Not for the first time, Li marvels at the colors - the blues, the greens, the white clouds. Hey, at least she got some things right. She centers the zooming tool over a section of the orb - as usual, she finds the closer you look, the uglier it gets. Nothing’s changed of course.

The project is titled “Planet Earth”. And despite Li’s best intentions, the project has been a complete disaster.

—

On the planet Velmora, the Velmi children are responsible for the meal prep every night. Meals are planned the previous evening, and a parent buys all ingredients, then is given the luxury of resting while their children cook. Li prepares baked Glowroot with a side of gilly greens, a nice easy dish she’s been making for years.

As they finally sit down to eat, Li knows it’s only a matter of time before her mother asks about the project again. Sure enough, the subject is raised within minutes.

“How does Earth look today?” her mother asks casually.

“Same.”

“Same?”

“Same. Violence and hate. Wars. Disease. Fires. Seriously, a large chunk of it is just burning uncontrollably. And honestly, none of the people seem to like each other. They all just form tribes and pit themselves against the other tribes. And each tribe is basically the same, you know? They have only minor differences. But those differences are enough to fuel the hatred. So yeah… same.”

“Well, what have you tried doing?”

“All kinds of stuff that my teacher suggested. I added religion to the mix - oh man, that just made things worse. I gave them a bounty of natural resources. But they just exploit them and fight over them. Seriously, I don’t know how the other kids’ projects are succeeding, but they are.”

“What’s happening with the others?”

Li considers the question. Then, rapid-fire, she begins listing her peers’ successes.

“Sara B’s planet has eliminated all war somehow. She says all she did was eliminate all pointy objects, but I know there’s more she’s not telling me. And Z? His inhabitants all communicate via song. They seem pretty happy about that, too. Edgar’s planet never generated people, but the entire planet serves as an energy source for the rest of his galaxy - it somehow emits a wavelength that fuels nearby planets. And Maria…”

“Okay, okay, Li. I get it.” Li is getting upset and her mother can tell.

“It’s just hopeless. I’m going to lose the science fair. And fail the class. And worse - be laughed at by everybody. I’ll never be able to go to school again!”

“Honey, don’t talk like that… Let’s think this through. What else can we try?”

Li rolls her eyes at her well-intentioned mother.

Her mother pulls out a sheet of paper and starts listing ideas.

“What if you increased the food supply, to make sure everyone had enough?”

“Tried it. Just went to the richest nations.”

“Did you try removing all sharp objects, as Sara suggested?”

“I tried that early on. Just created a world where it was hard to hunt, eat, and write things down. I quickly brought them back.”

“Is there a way to make the planet more happy and loving?”

“Not that simple, Mom. You can’t just say ‘here you go, here’s 30% more love.’ You need to do something more direct.”

“Well, is there something you can add that would increase the love?”

Li contemplates the question.

“Like what?”

“Honey, I remember when you were a little younger, and we got you that pet snoolu? That might have been the happiest I’ve ever seen you. What if… what if you overflowed the planet with cute little pets? What do humans like - little puppies and kittens, right? Everyone would have to be happier, wouldn’t they?”

Li perks up a bit. The idea, while a bit off the wall, has some merit. If everyone had puppies and kittens in their lives, they’d be too busy to hate and steal and kill, right?

Li briefly wonders if she should think this through, to consider the possible negative side effects. But honestly, she’d take any idea with even a small chance of succeeding right now. She is desperate.

She finishes her dinner and runs upstairs. She has a planet she needs to fill to the brim with puppies and kittens.

—

The next morning, the first thing Li does is check on her project. She again pushes everything aside in her closest, and zooms in closely to various points on her little planet.

Holy crap.

Things have certainly changed. Are they better? That’s still to be determined.

Li pieces together what’s happened. At first, humanity was thrilled to have an influx of cuteness. They embraced the new pets, and spent the majority of their days petting, snuggling, and playing with the animals. But the humans quickly grew soft and helpless to the cuteness.

Even as the puppies evolved over generations, they remained loyal and loving. They followed their human masters everywhere.

But the kittens? The kittens evolved in a much different way.

As they evolved, they grew smarter, and within a few short generations they developed into a hyper-intelligent species. And this species was certainly not content with being confined to a role as humanity’s little pets and playthings. They rallied together, and seized power.

Overnight in Li’s time - within about 150 years of humanity’s time - the super cats eliminated their former human masters. With humanity now extinct, they took control over the dogs, enslaving them and forcing them into lives of labor. All of Earth’s other animals fell in line, following their new overlords.

Li can’t believe it. By adding more kittens, she’d eliminated humans in her project. Her project went from a disaster to… well, an even bigger disaster of another kind.

She leaves the house, aquarium in hand, sure she is going to be the biggest laughing stock the school had ever seen.

—

As the science fair begins, Li paces nervously in front of her display. Some of the other children ask her about her project, but she dodges the questions. Of course, they’ll learn some enough of the fiasco that her Earth project has become.

She eyes the judges, all teachers from her school, as they make their way around the room. They stop at Maria’s display. And Z’s. Next is Edgar’s. The judges are smiling and nodding their heads, liking what they are seeing. Her peers have created planetary masterpieces. She, meanwhile, has created a dumpster fire.

Well, at least her dumpster fire is filled with adorable kittens.

Eventually, the judges reach Li’s display.

“So what do we have here?” asks the first judge.

“This… this is Earth, the planet I created,” responds Li with a noticeable quiver in her voice.

“Hmm.” The judges zoom in on the planet, making their observations. “Limited natural resources. Climate concerns. A complete lack of humanity. Signs of destruction worldwide. And…”

Here it comes, thinks Li.

“And it appears your planet is ruled by a collective of hyper-intelligent kittens.”

Li cannot bear to look. She hears snickering from the nearby students. Her throat is dry. Her eyes are starting to water. She’s failed, she just knows it.

“It’s… ABSOLUTELY FASCINATING!” exclaims one of the judges. And the others nod in approval. They’re actually intrigued by what’s happened in the course of her project!

“I think we’ve seen enough,” replies the first judge again. “This project - Planet Earth - is our winner for Most Original & Innovative!”

The snickering has now stopped. Li’s throat remains dry, but the tears have vanished. She’s… won an award? Simply stunning.

The judges move along to the next display, and some of her peers pat Li on the back in congratulations. She’s speechless and immobile.

Surely Earth was a disaster. It had been a disaster since the start, or at least since humanity was created. Apparently… all Earth needed was a little extra dose of adorable kittens.

Maybe just about any planet, no matter how bleak things seem, can be salvaged?