Thorns & Roses

I woke up and found myself in a busy hospital. I could hear the nurses chatting beside my bed. I tried to get up but failed. My entire shoulder was feeling numb. The last thing I remember is receiving a bullet in the same place. I felt as if I just woke up from a long hibernation. My muscles would not move On mu command.

Does hibernating animals fee the same way? I asked myself. The nurse approached me with some sweets and a wide smile. I learned that we won the war. I was called up by the captain after I got discharged.

I really did not do anything, sir. It was the boys who led us to victory, I said.

My captain replied,

I very well know that Major. But it was your call to make yourself as the decoy so that the unit could advance and give a surprise attack from the side. Making yourself as a decoy requires bravery to execute and a heart to sacrifice… which is why I am recommending you for “Red Dragon Medal of Honour”. Also, here…you have a letter.

I had mixed emotion.

Thank you, sir, this is an honour for me.

I rushed to my dormitory and was eager to read the letter. I was so glad when I saw the name of the sender.

From

Victoria Devraj

After months of blood, sweat, tears, anger, disappointment, violence, war etc. I could really use some love.

I began reading the letter.

Bae… Love… Honeybunch… Cheechub…

I missed calling you the above. Ohh and P.S I have at least 10 new nicknames for you. I missed you so much. Every day I pray for you and I hope I don’t get any nightmares when I sleep. God is showing his grace upon us by protecting you. God forbid if anything happens I don’t know how I would live my life without you.

Our baby Nick is growing so fast. I am teaching him to ride a bicycle. I hope you are here with me soon to share many other baby moments. Mum and dad are doing alright. The doctor is giving positive feedback about mum’s health. Dad is hiring more people to take care of our business. He often tells me that this year business will be much better. Scooby misses you so much. He gets excited when I show him your picture. I often see him with tear marks around his eyes. Every day he patiently sits near the door waiting for your arrival.

Bae…Do you remember the fight we had last time you were home? A month back when you came home I asked you for a promise.

I asked you not to sacrifice your life in any battle. I was very afraid that you will come home one day in a box. My heart would literally explode if I see a box in front of my house. You denied the promise. We fought for hours that day. You said that it is the duty of a soldier to lay his life on the line for the country if he needed to. I contradicted the point stating it is also your duty to take care of me. We reached a compromise that you will quit the job in a year which will fulfil the short service commission duty. Now that I hear that there is another war erupting in the border I am certain that they will send you for battle again. I’m not even able to sleep these days. I am not even certain that you will be alive by the time this letter reaches you.

These were my thoughts until yesterday. Today early morning a nightmare woke me up from my sleep. It was related to baby Nick. I can’t even explain you the nightmare. My hands started to shiver when I tried to pen it down. I understood why you are so keen on saving people regardless of their safety. It is much more than patriotism or the country right? It is for the people. It is for the next generation. It is for the future generation whom you protect so that they can protect the generation after that. You are protecting baby Nick’s future too.

Even though we came into agreement that you will quit after completion of short service, I want you to extend the service. I want you to complete your short term commission and apply for a long term in the army. Do whatever it takes to protect the people. Yes, don’t worry, you are not in a dream I want you to give your blood, sweat and tears to the country as your country needs more men like you. I also want you to do as you feel during your service without any restriction, even keep your life on the line if necessary. Don’t worry about me. I am Major Devraj’s wife. I am as tough as you. Maybe even more 

Nick has drawn a picture for you and was insisting me to post it along with this letter. Turn the page.

Your 24x7x365 loving wife, 

Victoria.

The drawing was of a family of three standing near a house. Baby Nick used crayons and pencils for his artwork. I loved how his drawing was imperfectly perfect. I was in tears by the time I finished the letter. I lied down on my bed and started to smile as my mind began to play memories inside my head. Suddenly one thing alarmed me. I got up and was going through the drawing in detail. Myself, Victoria and Baby Nick were near which a building which resembles a Barnhouse. We were drawn in pencil and the rest surroundings were coloured with crayons.

And then I saw it. Victoria’s belly had shades of yellow colour in the drawing.

Was Victoria pregnant?

I was going through the drawing pattern of Nick and only the background were drawn in crayons while he drew us in strictly in pencil.

Was the colouring of the belly just an imperfect stroke from a seven-year-old?

Was I happy or angry?

Last time I saw her we did not get time for intimacy.

Was she really pregnant with my child?

Was she cheating?

Tears rolled down my cheeks instantly as I clenched my fist.