Deja vu

               The neighbors dog was barking incessantly, its high pitched wail is setting my teeth on edge. Groggily I roll over and cram my pillow over my head, but it does little to silence the noise.    

               “Shut that dog up” I shriek at nobody and everybody. My head feels like its going to burst, I am so tired I can barely open my eyes. My body aches too.  I must be coming down with something. I look at the clock, its 6:30. Ugh! I’m late. Why didn’t my alarm go off, I needed to be up a hour ago. No time for a shower, that I could really of used to wake me up. I rapidly throw my clothes on, brush my teeth and twist my hair into a bun. I look into the mirror, Oh well not great but it will have to suffice. I don’t have time to make breakfast either so I’ll just grab something on the way to work.

               I roll down the window, hoping the cool air will revive me. If not for that blasted dog I would still be sleeping, and probably be unemployed too, for not showing up for work today. Its strange though, because my neighbors don’t have a dog.  I remember Agnus telling me she was deathly afraid of dogs that’s why she had cats. I pull into the drive thru of my favorite fast food restaurant and order my usual; sausage biscuit and dr.pepper, the breakfast of champions. I chuckle to myself as I glance at my watch. Wow I am running so late. I drive a little faster, pulling into the parking lot with a minute to spare. After parking my car, I grab my breakfast and literally run to the door. Juggling my breakfast and purse, I rummage for my store key. Oof, the air is knocked out of my lungs when I run right into something very solid, everything I was carrying goes flying as I fall backwards onto my backside.

               Cursing my clumsiness I look up from my awkward position into a pair of  gorgeous pale blues eyes.   I’m momentarily tongue tied as I take in the incredibly handsome man those eyes belong to. He’s staring down at me with a frown, but slowly as I stare at him it becomes a smile. He reaches a hand down to help me up and I notice that he is covered with in soda. 

           “I am so sorry! I am late for work and wasn’t watching where I was going. I am very, very sorry” I ramble in embarrassment.  He is still holding onto my hand and looking at me with those incredible eyes.  He hasn’t said a word yet and it’s starting to get unnerving, I gently pull my hand away but continue to look into his eyes.

              “Jessie, you need to open the door, we should of opened three minutes ago.” One of my co-workers calls from the front of the store. I drag my eyes away from the man, muttering apologies as I pick up my purse and ruined breakfast. I then hurry to unlock the door to the jewelry store I manage. I look back in the direction of where the man had been, but he is gone.

               Entering the store, I immediately get to work, all but forgetting the embarrassing incident. The store is unusually busy today. I helped a young couple with the purchased a wedding ring set and sold a nice gentleman a solid gold pocket watch. Agnus my neighbor even came in to buy a her granddaughter a bracelet for her birthday.   Just as she was getting ready to leave the bell over the door rang announcing another customer.  It was the man from this morning, he walked over to where I was standing and placed a soda and a bag of food on the counter between us. I saw it was from my favorite restaurant.

            “I thought you might be hungry, since I ended up wearing your lunch.” He said in a deep voice.  Chills ran down my spine, things like this never happened to me.

             “This is very kind of you.” I breathlessly said, not correcting him that it was my breakfast he wore not my lunch. I stood there silently not knowing what else to say.

             “I have an ulterior motive bringing you your lunch.” He smiled.

             “You do?” I asked somewhat deflated.

             “I’m new in town and embarrassed to say kind of lonely, so I want to take you to dinner tonight?”

              “Dinner tonight?” I repeated stupidly.

              “How about La Fiesta, say at 8:00. You do like Mexican food.” He said this more as a statement than a question.

              “Yes, I love Mexican food.” I stammered.

              “Great I’ll pick you up then,” he must have realized by my expression that I was going to turn him down; he was a stranger, I wasn’t stupid enough to give him my address, because he immediately said, “Or you can just meet me there.”

                “ I would rather meet you there.” I absently agreed, Wait ! had I just agreed to a date,? I scolded myself silently, not believing I’d told him that I would go out with him.

               “Okay, I’ll see you at 8:00, don’t stand me up, I know where you work.” He laughed as he left the store. I was still trying to figure out how I wound up with a date, when Doris walked over and opened my bag.

                 “Wow, that smells delicious, you want to share,” she coaxed. 

                 “Sure” I told Henry that Doris and I were going to break for lunch and that if he needed anything to just yell.                   

                 The rest of my day passes in a blur, I’m nervous and excited about tonight. When I get home I jump straight into the shower I missed this morning. Then I demolish my closet, looking for the best outfit. I choose a pale blue pheasant blouse and my favorite jeans. Checking my hair and makeup one last time, I decide I’m ready. I arrive at the restaurant 10 minutes early, when I walk in I see he’s already there. Seeing him stand and come toward me, I marvel at how good looking he is. It’s at that moment I realize, I don’t even know his name! I never asked and he didn’t offer. Of course I never told him my name either, how awkward.

              “Jessica, I’m so glad you didn’t stand me up.” He smiled taking my hand. I’m dumbfounded for a moment.

               “How did you know my name? I still don’t know yours.” I asked suspiciously. He laughed and grabbed my other hand,

                “This morning while you were profusely apologizing for steam rolling me, your co-worker called your name, and my name is Cade, by the way. I’m very pleased to meet you.” My face turned as red as the serape hanging on the wall. The hostess appeared saving me from further conversation at the moment.

              “Your table is ready sir.” Cade put his arm around my shoulders as we were led to a table. He seemed reluctant to let go of me as I sat down, I am not sure I like how forward he is, it makes me edgy. He sits across from me and I keep my hands in my lap so he won’t grab them. 

                 Once the hostess leaves, I silently look around. Cade hasn’t said anything yet, he is just looking at me. I grace him with a shy smile and pick up the menu.

                “The green chili burritos are the best here” He drawls slowly.

                “I’ll keep that in mind, thanks” my nervousness is making me agitated. The waiter comes to the table with our chips and salsa. He asks what we’d like to drink.

                “We’ll both have a margarita” Cade told him as I silently fumed.

                “ Would you like an appetizer before dinner?” the waiter asked.

                 “Yes, a cheese crisp and for dinner we’d like two of your #7’s.” Cade said dismissing the waiter by turning his attention back to me. I couldn’t believe he didn’t let me order my own dinner.

                “How do you know I’ll like what you ordered,” I uttered in irritation. He look surprised for a second, then back came that irresistible smile.

                “I’m sorry if you felt I was being brash, I’m just use to taking charge of situations.” He grinned. I sigh and smile back, maybe I am just being querulous. He makes small talk as we wait for our food. I find that I’m really starting to loosen up, he is funny and easy to talk to. We stayed at the restaurant long after we had finished our meals, just talking and laughing. The waiter comes to our table and asks if we need anything else because they are closing. I didn’t realize it was getting so late, and I’m disappointed that the evening is ending, but he asks me out again tomorrow and I readily agree. I give him my address so he can pick me up there.

                 For the next week we see each other every evening. I can’t believe how fast I am falling for him, it’s like a dream. Friday night we went dancing, he is so attentive, I feel like I’m the only women in the world, it is so romantic. When we got back to my house, he wrapped his arms around me kissing me passionately,

                “I’m going to stay tonight and make love to you Jessica.” He was making me crazy with his kisses, but this wasn’t going to happen. I believed sex was for marriage and that was non negotiable. I tore my lips from his and explained how I felt. For a fraction of a second I saw anger in his eyes, but then as fast as it came it was gone. 

               “Well, I’ll see you bright and early for breakfast then.” He said before kissing me goodnight.

               “I’ll make the breakfast, bring your appetite.” I shouted as he descended the porch stairs.  With a smile and a wave he drove away.

                The next morning, I went all out for breakfast; eggs, bacon, sausage, biscuits and gravy. I even made fresh squeezed orange juice too. Cade seemed pleasantly surprised and he ate like it was his last meal. After we had finished eating he offered to help me clean up. I can’t explain the feeling I had. It was so domestic, so familiar and so right. Cade is the perfect man, I thought to myself. We went out to the front porch once we were done.

               “Tomorrow I arranged for us to go horse back riding” Cade told me as we sat together on my porch swing.

                 “Oh Cade, I have to work tomorrow, we’re getting a large shipment in.” I grabbed his hand to let him know how disappointed I was.

                  “So you’ll be working all day?” he seemed to be lost in thought.

                  “ Well the shipment, is due at 7am, I should be done by noon, then I’ll be free.” I told him cheerfully. He gave me a peck on the cheek and got up from the swing.

                  “I need to go, but I’ll see you tomorrow.” He mumbled distractedly. I sat there staring after him, had I said something wrong, he never had left me without wrapping me in his arms and kissing me till I saw stars. I chided myself for worrying needlessly.

               Saturday morning, I was still a little confused about Cades abrupt departure the night before, but I put it out of mind because I had work to do. The armored truck arrived at 7:00 on the dot, the guards brought in the jewels that had been ordered for a special exhibit. Doris and Henry were both here too. We had just finished checking the invoice with the guards when front door opened. I had thought I had locked it but obviously not. 

               “I’m sorry were closed.” I called from behind the counter, as the guard and I were closing the last box.

                “Not for me your not.” Cade? I turned around to see him standing inside the door. 

               “ Hi, what are you doing here, I will be finished in a little bit.” I smiled at him, but my smile quickly turned to puzzlement then fear as he reached behind his back and pulled out a handgun. He shot the guard who was beside me, then the other guard when he tried to pull his gun. Two other men came into the store behind Cade with guns drawn.

                 “You two get over here and lay face down .” one of the gunmen yelled at Doris and Henry. Henry complied immediately, but Doris was freaking out, crying and begging them not to hurt her.

                  “Please I’ll do anything, just don’t hurt m….” I heard the explosion and watched Doris fly into one of our glass display cases. I couldn’t even tell it was Doris anymore because the blast mutilated her. The guy with a shotgun then swung the gun toward Henry and shot him too as he lay face down on the ground.

                   “Why Cade, why are you doing this!” I screamed, I was in shock I couldn’t get my brain to comprehend what was happening, or the danger I was in. I ran to Cade,

                  “I love you! I thought you loved me, why are you doing this.” I cried out grabbing his shirt. He shook me off knocking me to the ground and smiled, an evil smile not the one I had grown to love.

                 “We were planning on robbing this store the day you so clumsily ran into me, but with all the attention you drew to us, I had a change my plans. You were so shy and skittish, I decided to enjoy myself as I waited for another opportunity. I had almost decided not to hit this store until you were kind enough to let me know about this shipment. So Thank you for that.” He pulled me to my feet and grabbing my face kissed me hard. I jerked away, agonizing over the fact that the death of four people was my fault, then when he jerked me close again, I spit in his face. he snarled, leveling the gun at my face and pulled the trigger………

                   The neighbors dog was barking incessantly, its high pitched bark was setting my teeth on edge. Groggily, I roll over and cram the pillow over my head, but it does little to silence the noise.

                     “Shut that dog up” I shriek. Then I get a sense that I’ve done that before. I  Sit up and try to clear my thoughts and instantly collapse back into my pillow. My head feels like it’s going to burst up, I can barely open my eyes, I feel like I’m missing something, I feel like a cloud of doom is hanging over me. I look at my clock its 6:30, I’m running late. I throw on my clothes, grab a piece of toast and head to work. Doris is just getting there as I pull up.

                 “Hey Doris, I call out, as I close my car door.” I notice a man leaning against the side of the building, a shiver races up my spine. I don’t know why but that man scares me. Hurriedly I unlock the door and go into the store. Henry walks in less than a minute later.  

                 “Did you hear the news about the rash of jewelry store robberies” Henry said casually. I run to the door and lock it. Doris and Henry look at me like I’m nuts.

                 “Was there a tall man still outside the building” I frantically asked.

                  “Ya, I think there was, now that you mention it.” He said.  I run over and grab the phone I dial 911.

                    “There is a man outside our store, I’m sure he's here to rob us.” I urgently tell the operator.

                    “Jessie! The guy is just standing out there, what are you doing?” Doris squeals.

                  “Look I don’t know how I know, but that guy out there is dangerous and he is planning on robbing us!” I told them as I put my hand over the receiver. The operator comes back on line and tells me she has dispatched a car and they’ll be here shortly.

            Doris and Henry start arguing with me, they think I’ve lost it and I probably have but……..    just then the door rattles somebody is trying to get in,

                “We’re not open yet,” I yell through the door.

                 “Come on , I’m in a hurry, it will only take a minute, can you please just open now.” A voice yells back. I know that voice, terror races through my body. 

                “This is silly.” Henry tells me and goes to unlock the door. Just then I hear the police cars pull up, there is a shot fired, then several more. The glass of the door shatters and Henry cries out grabbing is arm. After what seems like hours the police let us know were safe to come out. We help Henry out to the waiting ambulance, I glance at the covered body that is laying against the front of the store and tears come to my eyes.

               I hear one of the officers saying that the guy shot at them when they’ll pulled up so they had no choice.

               I look at the scene in front of me; the police, the ambulance, the stranger under the tarp, all morning the sense of deja vu has haunted me, mysteriously directing my actions. I should be relieved, I am safe, the fear is gone, the bad guy is dead. So why do I feel this deep unfathomable sense of sorrow?