Why me, Why Us?

It was like any other afternoon. Come home, bang through the side door, throw my bag.. wherever, and make a snack which I’d promptly destroy while playing my much missed game, Right? No siree. My mom hasn’t been feeling to well so I made sure to be quiet. Whole house dark, have you wondering if the electric bills been paid or not. I stumble over a shoe, of course it’s mine! Then.... I hear something. Now I hear something but I don’t want to hear ANYTHING. It’s just me and my mama. But I do. As I walk up the stairs, suddenly I’m yanked down by my pants.. I have fists slamming into me but I don’t know why or how. So I just close my eyes and shout out “mama!” Anguished, hurt, in pain, but my mama sleeps right through it. I’m trying to ask the man what he wants, but Im just a kid. I’m blubbering and yet it’s not enough for him to see that I’m not capable of standing up to him. He snatches me up and takes me from my home. Blood is running down my chin my eyes are streaming, which is blinding me in the afternoon light and still, this man says...nothing. He’s fishing through his pocket looking for keys I see hanging around his neck. Don’t matter none to me. Dummy can find out when he find out. He grunts and FINALLY finds the keys.. Again I’m begging him for an explanation but he just looks at me pleadingly, as if I owe him something! He starts the car, but doesn’t pull off. He speaks to me finally. “Your daddy messed up boy. He messed up bad”. My stomach almost hits the floor. My daddy! My daddy! A man I haven’t ever even known. He punches me twice more then kicks me, literally, out of his car. I cannot believe I’m living! I look around, not a neighbor in sight. In that moment while this mad man is driving off, all I feel is God. All I know is God. All I need is God. Without him I would have threw myself in front of that man’s car just to end it all. I’m a boy of 13 and yet I got up feeling like a man of 40. Never again would I allow a stranger to traipse through my home and endanger my family. I had to make a plan. So I did so. Mama and I found a new home. I made sure to change my route to and from home and school everyday. I separated myself from trouble and always made myself available for my mama. After all I am the man of the house. She doesn’t just need me, I need myself. I never found out why that man abused me and took me from my home that day. I always look over my shoulder on the streets though. You never know when God will test you and truly give you a reason to not only survive, but to live. I found a voice outside of my home. I voice that I used to spread my story of how I experienced the worst day of my life and lived. When my mama suggested to me that I should look into becoming an inspirational speaker, I actually laughed. I laughed! Then I thought long and hard. How can my story change someone’s life? How can I change the world? It only takes faith the size of a mustard seed. Will love and growth you’ll have a Forrest full of believers. Believers in love. I went on to start sowing those mustard seeds. One at a time was all I needed. I spent a lot of time thinking. My corner office I paid for became my sanctuary. Whenever I had an inspirational thought, I rushed to my office, jotting down thoughts on sticky notes as I rushed down the hall. To my surprise someone grabs me by the arm. My flashback is instant.... I can almost smell the oil on the mans hands when he attacked me so mercilessly in my home. I t took everything in me not to cry out. I swung once, two times, fully willing to knock out whoever had the gall to touch me, a man who’d been through a lifetime of unwanted aggression! I look, long, hard, and deep, into a face that looks almost exactly like mine, just older. I know it’s my father but I do not even dare want to believe it. “Now son”.... I gave him a look my mother had taught me well. It withered his next words right off his tongue. “ How Dare, you call me son”. My anger and hurt was so real I’m sure he felt it I know he did. The wetness in his eyes told me so. “Forgive me..” that’s it. That’s all. It was enough somehow. That day that I was forced to go through taught me well. Again I feel Him. God. As if He’s a cloak of holiness that I’ve been allowed to feel on my skin. I allowed Him to guide my heart. I chose to forgive my father because he would have to live with knowing he was never there. I became the man I needed to be without him. God watching over me the whole way. My heart was settled. My would finally content. I didn’t have to look over my shoulder anymore. Finally I had found my peace. Becoming and inspirational speaker was just the beginning of who I was destined to be. I began a foundation when I found out I was to become a daddy for the first time. The new baby filled me with too much hope and jittery excitement not too. This foundation was to be my life’s work. I began to call it Haven to anyone who listened. Haven is a way of life. A way to view things from All points of view instead of just one. Haven became bigger then a foundation once the world got ahold of it. Families all around the world were being positively impacted by the abilities of my foundation. So of course I had to do the honorable thing.... I named my firstborn little girl, whom I am sworn to protect, who will never be forced from her home, Haven. Haven Faith Honor. She is my reason for everything.