Hearts and Hands

It was finally Joanna Wilson’s moment to shine, and all she wanted was to sprint out of the ballroom. The blinding light of the photographer’s Nikon sent her heart racing, but what happened next thrusted Joanna from discomfort to shock and embarrassment, faster than the blink of a heavily mascaraed eye.

Mrs. Manning, the sponsor of the Belles, handed her the Top Shelf prize for the best all-around Belle for 1990 in the Southwest region. When the camera flashed, Lisa Martin appeared at the podium and wrested the plaque from Joanna’s trembling hands. Mrs. Manning’s water glass tipped over and soaked the bodice of her sky blue lace dress.

“Give it back, Lisa!”  Heads swiveled in their direction.

“It should be mine. I don’t care what you did or who your aunt is, Joanna.”

“I won the award, and what you think doesn’t matter. To anyone”, Joanna ignored the whispers of the audience and the tiny beads of perspiration dotting her eyebrows.

“You are such a bitch!” Lisa brandished the tiny gold plaque. Gasps echoed through the silent ballroom.

  “Maybe I am, but I don’t steal things from other people.” She pivoted on her uncomfortable pair of heels toward the lobby, trailed by her Aunt Marie, her silk royal blue sheath swishing as she ran.

Marie handed her niece a cloth napkin, “That girl has some nerve. Come on back, baby, that award is yours.”

“ I’m sick of all this”, Joanna wiped her chin and punched the arrow on the keypad. “I want to go home!”

“I know, but the conference isn’t over until Sunday.” Marie smoothed Joanna’s flyaway ends,

The bell dinged, and Joanna stepped inside the elevator, “I’ll stay upstairs until morning. I’m done, Aunt Marie. I don’t care about what y’all think. I want out of this group.”

Marie  “OK” and stepped back into the lobby as the elevator ascended.  

The sun had dimmed, leaving her in partial darkness in the corridor when she slid the keycard into the door and stepped inside the room. After she placed her dress on a hanger, Joanna crawled into the bed and pulled the covers. She was almost asleep when she heard the soft knock.

“May I come in, Joanna? “a low voice asked.

A minute passed, then a second knock.

“Joanna, I would like to speak with you,” Mrs. Manning said. 

A minute later, Joanna crawled back into bed as Mrs. Manning entered the room holding Joanna’s plaque. Her tea length gown that hugged more than skimmed. Gaudy gold tone bangles and bracelets adorned her wrists, a perfect compliment to her royal blue dress, accented by gold high-heeled sandals. 

“I know you’re upset, but you really should have stayed, Joanna”, Mrs. Manning said. “ I’ve already spoken to Lisa, and you should expect an apology from her before we leave.”

“I really don’t care if Lisa apologizes or not.” Joanna pulled the duvet up to her shoulders.

“Well, I care, Joanna. I commend you for your hard work. We are proud to have you as a Belle. And  I want you to know, everyone thinks you are a model for the other-“

“They all hate me.” Joanna shook her head. “I appreciate what you’ve done for me, ma’am. But after this summer, I’ll be leaving the Belles.”

“What?” Mrs. Manning’s eyebrows shot up.

“I really appreciate the award, but I’m done.” Joanna’s heart raced again, though the time to get upset would come later, with her mother.

“Don’t make a snap decision. Let’s talk, you, your parents, Marie and I about this.” Mrs. Manning moved to the edge of the chair, and Joanna slid closer to the middle of the twin bed.

“I don’t want to talk, Mrs. Manning. I just want to focus on school and college apps come Fall.”

“Please don’t let one incident make you want to quit, Joanna.” Mrs. Manning wrung her hands.

“I’m very tired, Mrs. Manning”, Joanna said, “Please tell my aunt I won’t be coming down for dinner.”

Joanna closed her eyes, and Mrs. Manning placed the award on the bedside table, crossed the room and departed. 

During the ride home the next afternoon, Joanna read one of her assigned Summer novels for AP English, sitting near the front of the charter bus, across from Marie. When the group disembarked at a rest stop in Bastrop, Joanna ignored her aunt’s offer of a cold drink and slept until their arrival 90 minutes later.

Joanna spent the remaining three weeks of Summer reading, gardening, and babysitting three times a week and Saturday afternoons for a young couple, the children of her parents’ oldest college friends.

When the letter from Mrs. Manning arrived the week before the first week of school, Joanna’s plan to leave the Belles unraveled. 

“You have only one more year after this, Joanna. And it will look great on your college resume.” Pauline thrusted the letter at her.

Joanna looked at her father Joseph, who averted his eyes.

“I know how you feel, JoJo, but your mother is right.” He grasped her shoulder as he headed to the kitchen.

Joanna opened her mouth to speak, but Joseph held up a hand.

“Whatever happened between you and that Lisa, it doesn’t matter. She’s just jealous of you, Joanna.” She brushed away the tear threatening to fall and disappeared into her bedroom. 

 Six weeks later, Joanna parked her father’s sedan in the lot of the church the second Saturday in September, for the initial Fall meeting. She walked in with her aunt when she arrived a few minutes later, and handed Joanna a chilled bottle of her favorite sweet tea.

“Joe let you borrow the car?”

Joanna nodded. 

“Everything will be OK, JoJo, you’ll see.” Marie kissed her niece’s forehead. 

Inside the Educational Building, most of the girls had already gathered. Lisa Martin sat at the back table, surrounded by the other senior girls, many of whom she attended school with at a nearby Catholic school.

“Well, look who finally decided to grace us with her exalted presence,” Lisa said, a smirk playing across her cherry red lips. She wore white jean cutoffs and a black tank top. 

Joanna sat in a folding chair near the podium where Mrs. Manning shuffled papers. 

I’m so glad you’re here. You look wonderful today.” Mrs. Manning nodded at Joanna, silently appraising her white maxi sundress and blue sandals, as she pulled her calendar and pen from her bag. She flipped through the pages, filled with the appointments her mother had penciled in for college fairs and prep workshops they would attend that Fall.

Joanna did a double take when Mrs. Manning announced that she and Lisa would lead the Belles first service project next Saturday.

“The Garden Society looks forward to your work on the Memorial Garden, and I know that you girls will do an excellent job as project leaders.” Mrs. Manning eyed Lisa whispering to the girls at the table, who laughed as Lisa said, “She only won it because of her aunt and these other tired old biddies.”

Joanna sipped her tea and twisted the friendship bracelet from Joseph.

“I can’t believe I’ve got to do this project with her.” Joanna toyed with her fries as she sat across from her brother at a nearly empty Prince’s Hamburgers a few hours after her meeting ended. Their booth was near the back of the restaurant, where they were surrounded by old Astros posters and framed headlines from one of the hometown newspapers. 

“JoJo, you can do this. Maybe she’s just-” Joseph said.

“Jealous of me?”

He smiled at Joanna. “No, I know that’s what Mom says, but I think it’s more than that.”

“Why do you think so, Joe?”

“‘Cause I had that happen with a guy from Scouts. Really annoying and hateful. Turns out he’d lost his younger brother in some freak accident.” Joseph slid the ketchup bottle across the table.

“What did you do?” Joanna turned the bottle upside down and slapped its bottom until a mound appeared on top of her remaining fries.

“We all tried to help him feel included, and be a friend to him.” Joseph covered her hand with his.

The next Saturday, Joanna arrived at the church with Aunt Marie thirty minutes early to unload flowerpots and supplies. 

After she struggled to carry a tray of chrysanthemums and caught her breath, Joanna addressed the group.

“Good Morning Belles! Thank you to everyone who’s here. So great to see everyone this morning,” Joanna said, as Lisa sashayed into the group, in tiny white shorts and a baseball cap. 

“I know that the Ladies’ Auxiliary Garden Society appreciates each of you so let’s get started remaking this garden, Belles!” Joanna watched Lisa, a lollipop stuck in her mouth, leaning against a truck, flanked by a pair of her friends.

“Are you OK? I know you hate to speak.” Marie said, smoothing a stray hair of Joanna’s into place.

“I’m fine, Aunt Marie.”

“Of course, our other leader is late, as usual.” Joanna gazed at Lisa, Marie patted Joanna’s shoulder. “That’s why you won that plaque.”

  Joanna shrugged and went to work, sinking her hands in the soil and enjoying the warm September morning sun and the fresh, cool breeze murmuring across her face.

A minute later, a shadow loomed on the sidewalk.

“Can I help you?” Joanna shaded her eyes. Lisa grinned and tugged on the strap of her top.

 Joanna gestured across the soil, “Sure.” 

She tossed a handful of pebbles into a small container when Lisa said, “You seem to know what you’re doing here. Do you work in the garden a lot?”

“With my Mom sometimes.” Joanna scooped dirt using her trowel. 

“Oh”, Lisa said.

When Joanna pawed a clump of deeply entangled roots, Lisa asked, “Do you need some help?” 

“I’ll manage.”

It was almost 10:00, and Joanna mopped her brow. She went to the parking lot to get her hat from her aunt’s Impala.

“You need a water break, JoJo?” Marie offered her a cup of water.

Joanna gulped. “Left my hat in the car,” 

“Oh”, Marie answered, digging her keys out of her pocket.

When Joanna returned, Marie smiled. “That’s too cute, I haven’t seen you wear that.”

“Mom loaned it to me.” Joanna adjusted the straw hat with the yellow flowers, a perfect match to her gloves. 

Marie nodded, “How are you getting along with Lisa?”

“I just want to get this done, Aunt Marie.” Joanna hugged her aunt.

“I understand.” 

A few minutes later, Lisa looked up. “Nice hat, Wilson.”

Joanna said, “Thanks. There’s water if you need a break.” 

“Did your Mom buy you that set?”

“I borrowed it.” Joanna glared at Lisa. “Do you have any other questions, because I’d like to get back to work, if you don’t mind.”

Lisa stood. “Sorry.”

Just stay over there with the rest of them, Joanna thought, picking up her trowel. She tried to unearth a pair of particularly woody roots when Lisa appeared again.

“Maybe if you grab the bottom, I can pull the top.” Lisa’s hands were slimmer than Joanna’s, a scar on her left crawled towards her forearm.

Joanna nodded, and placed her gloved hands at the base of the bigger root, and Lisa tugged at the top. After a few minutes of twisting, Lisa yanked the root free.

“That was a tough one.” Joanna slipped off her gloves and shook out the dirt.

“Some things are like that,” Lisa said, tossing the vegetation into the bin.

“I really appreciate your help.”

           Lisa nodded and scooped handfuls of dirt.

“I think my aunt has an extra pair of gloves in her car, would you like to use them, Lisa?” Joanna planted her trowel in the dirt before she rolled into a squat, and shielded her eyes from the beams of sunlight.

Lisa nodded and reached a soil-caked hand towards Joanna, which she accepted. “Thanks, Joanna.”