The good seed

August can feel the wet, cool grass beneath her feet. The cool breeze blowing her linen tunic, too warm for this time of year, but her mother told her it would be best. For whom? She feels the curls in her hair move with that same wind, and yet she feels nothing as she looks onto the path. The elders talking, offering words of advice and wisdom for the faint of heart. It is to honor those who have gone before. It is to provide for our ancestors as they have provided for us. She heard the teachings so often she began to believe it - until they took him.

“August…” She turned at the sound of her mother’s voice. She tried to force a smile. “August, there are plenty to go this year. You do not need to go.” Was she smiling? She wanted to reassure her mother, but she couldn’t. Did she even know? Did any of them know? She opened her mouth to tell her mother why she was really going. What she needed to do, but as with many times before, all that came out was, “I need to go, Mom.” She wanted to tell him that she would bring him back. Perhaps it was the way her face looked longingly at the thick forest ahead of her, but for the first time, she thinks her mother acknowledged it too. It was the way her eyes suddenly became sad and then nodded to August in a way of understanding. She didn’t speak, she didn’t hold her. She didn’t even say good-bye. She simply walked away. If she never came back, would that be what happened to her, too?

Hands suddenly clapped together, making August jump. Others looked at her strangely. It was a joyous time, and August was in mourning. The elder smiled and hooked his thumb through the suspenders of his pants. The travelers wore tunics and carried backpacks for the journey. Only the travelers made the pilgrimage through the forest to the other side, where they would gather the seeds for the next harvests and return. It was a ritual that occurred every 5 years. She waited for this moment. She was just one month from turning 16 when it happened before, and too young to go. But Josiah wasn’t. He was 17, and with so few people of age or agility, he had no choice.

“It is a blessing our young travelers can take this journey for the good of our community! Our ancestors created this tradition to be sure we will have an abundance of food and naught shall ever starve. The trip takes a day, but the travelers will know nothing but eternal night for that time. But when they come out on the other side, they will see the fruits of their journey laid out before them to gather and bring back to us for the next 5 bountiful years!” Everyone is clapping and nodding. People hugging each other as though this ritual is a walk through the park. Do they not remember? Aren’t they afraid?

August looked towards her mother, standing stoic with her 12-year-old brother in front of her, frantically waving at her. Excited to see her partake in this ritual. A ritual that is uncertain if she will return. Does he even know?

“August! Would you like to pair?” August turned to the girl with eyes that looked wide because they were spaced too far apart on her head. She had an odd look, and it was likely no one thought her lucky to pair with. That and the limp she had since birth made her less likely to get to the clearing before all the ‘good seeds’ were taken. August didn’t care. She was not looking to harvest anything. She was looking for Josiah. She nods at the girl. “My name is Cassandra. We’ve met before. People call me Cassie.” Cassie must have taken her silence for unknowing. But August knew all the ones who would be going. August made sure to know them all. Just in case they didn’t return. She didn’t want to forget like everyone else did.

“It is time travelers! Good luck and good seed!” The elder and the people not going parted the way for the tunics to pass through. August and all the travelers lit their lanterns and started on the path. After such a rapturous send-off, the start seemed ominous. The lanterns creaked in tune with the sound of their bare feet going over the sands. The path was wide. Allowing 4 or 5 people to walk side by side and still have plenty of room, but that didn’t need to happen. There were only a dozen of them. The number they needed was 10. Always an even number they needed and always an odd number returned. It was what Josiah told her. He couldn’t tell her how he knew, but that it had been passed to him from his family. He remembered them all. His family always did. But Josiah’s family wasn’t there today. No one was old enough to come. His family had no seeds that year and would not have any for some years to come.

“How far do you think the path is?” Cassie’s whisper pulled her from her thoughts. “I think it is far, which is why it takes a day’s walk.” “Are we walking all day?” August shrugged. The forest was dark. It was like they went from a sunny sky to a moonlit night, but there was no moon to tell where the faint light was coming from. It was as though all the things around them shone with their own iridescent light. Like something within the trees or the grass that illuminated. It would have been beautiful if August hadn’t been so scared.

Cassie’s limp made their walk more of a stroll, though Cassie seemed to huff and puff with exertion. The other tunics were way ahead of them. Cassie seemed to take notice. “We have to catch up, August. They will get all the good seeds. I have to get seeds for my family. They have to be good seeds; they can’t be like me.” August looked at Cassie. “You aren’t a bad seed, Cassie.” Cassie looked at her with confusion. “I’m not a good seed.” “Why?” Cassie’s face contorted with anger. “You do not need to make fun of me! I am going to make it right! I am going to make it better for my family!” Cassie moved faster, almost running, but her limp would not allow her the speed, and she started to fall. August ran up to her and tried to catch her, but her angle and Cassie’s momentum made them fall together in a heap. Cassie started sobbing.

August quickly rose up off Cassie. Her lantern still lit, but Cassie’s had gone out. “Cassie! Are you hurt?” Cassie slowly stood up and brushed off her tunic. “No!” August saw the cut on her leg. A small one, but an injury nonetheless. August tried to help her, but Cassie shoved her away. She went to pick up her lantern, but August pushed her hand away from it. “You cannot pick up the lantern once the light has gone out, remember?” Cassie blinked at her and then looked at the lantern. “You’re right. I forgot.” August nodded and Cassie started limping forward.

They were quiet as they walked. August wasn’t sure what to say. She didn’t understand Cassie. She turned to Cassie to say so when out of the corner of her eye she saw a light. She looked behind them and stopped. Cassie stopped and said, “August, we have to…” August abruptly turned around and faced Cassie then pulled Cassie’s arm so they would continue forward. “Cassie, do not look back.” “But August… my lantern was lit. It was lit right where we left it. It wasn’t lit before. What lighted it?” “I don’t know.” They walked on and now August could only focus on everything around them. Every branch that swayed and every leaf that moved made her wonder what was there. Who was watching?

August and Cassie lost sight of the others long ago. They were alone in the forest. Nothing but dense trees around. No birds. No owls. No squirrels. Nothing. No growls of any wild animals. Nothing. It was too quiet for forest as dense as this which should be teeming with wildlife. Why was it so quiet?

They didn’t know how long they walked, but they had to keep moving. Despite not having food or water, they felt neither not hungry or thirsty. They didn’t have to use the bathroom. It was as though they were moving through space and time, but their bodies were still. Even the cut on Cassie’s leg appeared open, but never bled. It was as though it was suspended from when it happened. Would it later bleed? They didn’t tire enough to stop, but the weight of the walk did eventually wear and just when August began to feel it, she saw the light up ahead.

Cassie started laughing and moving faster. She must have seen it too. August smiled and felt better. Like she made it through something. Accomplished something. But what, she didn’t know. Her and Cassie laughed and practically ran to the clearing, then stopped and walked more slowly when they saw what beheld them. There were only 6 tunics there. Cassie and August were last. Where were the other two? Who were they? August couldn’t remember them or their names. August felt panic rise within her. Is it happening? What’s happening?

“Where…” August felt the words die in her throat. It was like her mind wanted to ask, but her body wouldn’t will the question. The other tunics looked at her too with the same look. They wanted to know too. Cassie said, “We are last.” August breathed out. One pair said, “We are second.” “We are third.” “We are forth.” August nodded at them. They all felt it, and they all understood. The first pair was lost.

Cassie, not one to forget her objective, said, “Where are the seeds?” The others looked around and said, “They are not here.” August looked at the clearing. It was a bright sunny day. A large meadow with tall grass swaying in a breeze she could no longer feel. Her mother was right. She was hot from the walk, and the sun beating down was warm. Too warm.

August turned to the group. “We have to fan out and look for the seeds. To assume they would simply be here waiting for us to pick up is not worthy of good seeds. The sun is too warm, and the seeds could become ill and die.” The other tunics suddenly fanned out and sprang into action. They all went in search of the seeds, and before August realized it, she was alone in her search. She tried to see above the grass, but she couldn’t. She wanted to call out to Cassie, but something told her ‘no’. She tried to keep her compass in line with the sun to be sure she could get back. Josiah’s lessons did not fault her. There were 8 of them now, and there was still an even number.

She pushed apart another patch of grass, and there in a bundle was a seed. It had thick black curls on its head and sun-kissed skin that seemed to soak up the warmth of the sun. It was beautiful. August picked it up and held it close. It opened its eyes, and she was shocked by the vibrant amethyst color. The same rare color of Josiah’s eyes. The seed locked onto her, and it bonded. She could feel the touch of this seed in her core. Like a tether that bound her to it, and she knew she would forsake all else and everything else for this seed. For Thaddeus. His name came to her instantly. The bond between them becoming more intricate. It wound around her soul, and she felt the anxiety and fear melt away. She did not fear for herself anymore.

The rustle in the grass made her clutch her seed and spin around towards the threat, and her breath caught in her throat. He stood tall and beautiful. His amethyst eyes stared back at her. “Josiah?” He smiled at her. “Hello, my Moon.” It was his name for her. She was his August Moon. She felt the tears at finally being able to utter his name after 5 years. Long years of making sure she repeated his name every day to never forget it. Years of building the courage to come and find out what happened to him. The only one she ever loved. The only one she could ever love. He came to her and cupped her face. “I cannot stay, and it is forbidden to see you again, but I had to. You cannot come back.” “Why?” August felt her tears. “Do you never wonder why there is only ever one parent? Why do you have no father? Why did I have no mother?” She shook her head in disbelief. “It is up to us to create the seeds that others cannot. The forest allows us to do so, but we cannot leave. I bargained for more to have my first with you. You and I have made this seed, my August Moon. You are my first, and I will always have that with me.” August didn’t understand how it worked, but somehow she knew. She saw her curls and the combination of their skin with the eyes that were all Josiah.

“That was why I remembered.” “Only some things you were allowed. But much of it is forgotten, and only I remember. But it will hold me forever, and I am sorry that I have been selfish with this, but I was not allowed to go back, and it was the only way to have you with me. August slowly nodded. “I must go, but I can leave you with something to remember.” Josiah leaned in and kissed her lips. It was not the awkward kiss of children who didn’t know where to place their noses. It was the coming together of people who fit together more than the world that they were a part of. People who, in their moment of need to be together, remembered each other and created a seed.

August felt the sun suddenly gone and a coolness crossing her. She opened her eyes with her head still tilted up and looked around. She had no lantern, and her backpack was still on her back, but the seed was not in her pack. It was still nestled in her arms, smiling up at her with a look of knowing, but she couldn’t for the life of her know what it could know. She snuggled it and looked ahead to where the people gathered, waiting for her return. She saw her mother and waved. As she moved forward, five other girls were running with their backpacks filled with their seeds and waving to their families. August looked back and saw a strange light in the middle of the road. Almost like a lantern had been turned on. For a moment, she thought she saw a man standing there. Like someone familiar. She touched her lips and remembered a kiss. Something books wrote about and movies tried to capture… that man standing there… “August!” She turned and saw her mother waving her on to come out of the forest. August smiled and started forward. When she turned back, the light and the man were gone. Odd.

Her mother reached her as she came out of the forest. “Let me see!” Her mother gently took the bundle and gushed, “Oh, August! How beautiful! What rare eyes indeed!” August sighed with happiness. “Yes, they are so lovely. I have never seen eyes so wonderful before.” But as she said it, she felt it wasn’t true. She turned around and looked at the forest. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a man there with a cane. He had a limp and strangely seemed sad about their return. Why wasn’t he happy? Didn’t he know what they did for their community? They brought back a good harvest and many good seeds.