Contest #271 winner 🏆

180 comments

Drama Sad Fiction

The elderly lady shuffled the few remaining steps to the park bench and sat down, happy to catch her breath and rest for a moment. The autumn sunshine was warm, but the nip in the air made her glad of her warm coat. She placed her handbag neatly on her knee.

“Good morning,” said the silver-haired gentleman at the other end of the bench. “Beautiful day.”

Elsie smiled. “Yes, it is. Cold, but lovely.”

The man folded his newspaper and returned the smile. “I’m George.”

“Hello, George. I’m Elsie.” She re-arranged her scarf, her gnarled fingers struggling in the cold.

They sat for a few moments quietly, looking over the city. “I’ve always loved this view.” 

“Pardon?”

“The view,” George repeated. “I’ve been coming here since I was a boy. I used to watch the trains.”

Elsie looked to where George was pointing, down the hill towards the city. 

“I liked the steam trains. Do you see?” He added. 

“Yes, I can see. No more steam trains now, though, I’m afraid. It was different, then.”

George nodded. “It was. I’d travel the country. My folks had no idea where I was half the time. It wasn’t like it is today.” He paused. “Do you have children?”

“Yes, two. And grandchildren, now.”

“Then you’re blessed. What are their names?” George turned to look at Elsie, noticing her careworn face, the long, white plait that rested over her shoulder.

“Timothy, is the eldest. He has two little ones of his own now.” Elsie said, proudly. “Well, not so little now. They’ve grown and gone, too. I don’t get to see them as much as I’d like.”

“I’ve always liked the name Timothy.”

Elsie smiled. “And then there’s Ellen. She got married, finally, last year. She’s nearly sixty! She finally took the plunge.”

“Well that’s lovely!”

“It is. It was. She looked beautiful.”

George sat back. “I always wanted children.”

Another few moments passed by, quietly. 

Elsie looked over. “You can read your newspaper, George. I don’t mind.”

“No, no. It’s okay. I don’t often get chance to chat. Especially with a beautiful woman.” He said, with a wink. 

Elsie chuckled. “Charmer. I bet you broke some hearts.”

“I don’t know about that!”

“Did you grow up around here, then?”

“Yes,” replied George. “Not far. And I went to school here, too. Calder… Calder something.” He shook his head. “I forget.”

“Age does that to us, doesn’t it?” Elsie asked, softly.

George shrugged. “I guess it does.”

She sighed. “It takes away the most precious things. Our bodies, our minds, our memories.” 

They fell into quiet again, both looking at the city sprawled out before them, lost in their own thoughts.

“May I ask you something, George?” 

He turned to look at her again. “Of course!”

“Have you ever married?”

George shook his head. “No, I never married. There was a girl I knew… once. I forget her name. Have you?”

“Yes. I was lucky enough to marry my best friend. The love of my life.”

“Well that’s wonderful!”

“Yes. It was wonderful. I’ve… lost him now. And it’s lonely. Terribly, terribly lonely.” Elsie looked down at her lap.

George reached over and took her hand, tenderly. “I’m very sorry for your loss. How long ago?” 

“Around five years ago. Nothing has been the same since.” Tears filled her once, bright blue eyes. They were cloudy now; age and sorrow had faded their beauty. 

George frowned. “That’s such a shame. Do you have anyone close?”

Elsie shook her head. “They have their own lives. Timothy is in Chester, Ellen in Manchester. And I feel like all I do is cross names out of my address book.” She paused. “All of my friends… They’re all gone.” 

George reached into his pocket for his handkerchief and offered it to her. “There, now. It’s okay.”

Elsie managed a small smile. “Thank you.” She wiped her eyes. “It’s silly. You must think I’m an old fool, sitting on a bench, crying.”

“Not at all.”

“Well I feel like an old fool. I should be glad of what I have. I’m still here, my children are happy and healthy. You were right, I have been blessed.”

George looked puzzled. “What?”

“A minute ago, you said I was blessed. For having my children.”

“Oh, that’s right.” He shook his head. “I’m more forgetful, the older I get.”

Elsie tried to pass the handkerchief back but George refused. “Keep it, I have plenty.”

“Okay, I will. Thank you.” She opened her handbag and tucked the handkerchief inside. She snapped it shut again. “It’s a funny old life, George, don’t you think?”

He tilted his head, not understanding. “In what way?”

“I just… can’t believe I’m here. At the end of my life. And what do I really have to show for it?”

George didn’t reply. 

“I don’t feel any different than I did ten years ago. Twenty years ago, even. And now when I look in the mirror, an old woman looks back.” She sighed. “It all feels so… pointless.”

George cleared his throat. “I don’t know how to help you with that one, I’m afraid,” he said, a little uncomfortably.

“I know, George. I don’t expect answers. I just wanted to say it out loud.”

Quiet fell again. 

“I used to take the trains, you know. All around the country.”

“Yes. You said.”

George laughed. “I did?” 

Elsie smiled, indulgently. “Yes. And your parents didn’t know.”

“Not a clue. Not like today.”

“No, George. It isn’t like today at all.”

George turned to look at her. “Do you know, you seem really familiar. Have we met before?”

Elsie sighed. “Yes. We have met.”

George frowned. 

“And it’s time we went home. This cold is getting right to my bones.”

George continued to frown. 

“Come on. I’ve got a casserole in the oven. And then it’s time for the racing. You like the racing.” She stood, stiffly, then held her hand out. She smiled, encouragingly. “Come on, George. Home time.”

George stood, still frowning. “Home?”

“Yes, sweetheart. Home. And we can ring Tim later and see him on the screen. Remember?”

George nodded slightly and stood. 

“Don’t forget your paper.”

The elderly couple walked away from the park bench where they had sat every Sunday morning for the past fifty years, hand in hand, back to the house where they had raised their children. Empty now, thought Elsie as she lead her husband back through the park. Entirely empty.

October 06, 2024 12:36

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180 comments

Sarina HB
02:59 Oct 23, 2024

This was such a sweet story! I felt like I was right there with them feeling the cold crisp air. Even made me tear up a bit. Reminded me to cherish the special little moments we have in life. Thank you!

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Kate Simkins
07:53 Oct 23, 2024

I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment! And I agree - the small moments are really important.

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22:04 Oct 22, 2024

I saw the ending coming and it still broke my heart!

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Kate Simkins
07:53 Oct 23, 2024

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. It is really sad situation, and one that is close to my heart.

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09:00 Oct 22, 2024

That twist was a real gut punch, Kate! What a phenomenal story about love and ageing. You earned this win!

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Kate Simkins
09:24 Oct 22, 2024

Thank you! I appreciate the comment ☺️

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Karen Pole
00:28 Oct 22, 2024

Really good I enjoyed it. Thank you

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Kate Simkins
08:16 Oct 22, 2024

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. I appreciate it!

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Sophia Marvin
23:40 Oct 21, 2024

Write a book now?!!!

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Kate Simkins
08:15 Oct 22, 2024

On it!!

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Brian Bosader
21:30 Oct 21, 2024

My gosh that dialogue of yours .... I felt as if I were sitting there between Elsie and George listening to them go back and forth! Excellent story and writing!

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Kate Simkins
08:15 Oct 22, 2024

Thank you! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment :-)

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Adrian Yepez
19:35 Oct 21, 2024

It's like a never-ending meet cute. A little flirty, yet a little sad, with great dialogue, and warm characters, you created a beautiful story, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

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Kate Simkins
19:36 Oct 21, 2024

Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment 😊

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Lynne Boyd
19:03 Oct 21, 2024

Beautifully written, and what a sweet but sad ending. Congratulations on your win.

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Kate Simkins
19:08 Oct 21, 2024

Thank you! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.

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Story Time
15:15 Oct 21, 2024

I love how grounded the piece is. It has a real impact to it that resonates and all due to your admirable restraint in language. Well done.

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Kate Simkins
15:37 Oct 21, 2024

Thankyou! I really appreciate you taking the time to read my story and leave a comment.

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10:28 Oct 21, 2024

It’s beautiful Kate. And so smoothly and easy written. Deserved win. Congratulations. 🌹

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Kate Simkins
11:32 Oct 21, 2024

Thank you! I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment 😀

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Garrett Rice
23:59 Oct 20, 2024

The end paragraph hit me like a ton of bricks. Devastating, and beautiful. Well done!

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Kate Simkins
07:52 Oct 21, 2024

Thank you very much!

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Heidi Fedore
22:47 Oct 20, 2024

Great job with giving us hints but leaving the reveal till the end.

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Kate Simkins
07:51 Oct 21, 2024

Thank you 😊

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20:01 Oct 20, 2024

Smooth reading, comfortable pacing, realistic dialogue and characters, good ending. I enjoyed reading your story, Kate. Looking forward to reading more of your stories.

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Kate Simkins
20:05 Oct 20, 2024

Thankyou! I really appreciate you taking the time to read and comment 😌

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Michael Nohe
19:39 Oct 20, 2024

Very well crafted. Emotional, not maudlin. Congrats.

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Kate Simkins
19:48 Oct 20, 2024

Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. I appreciate it!

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Michael Nohe
14:10 Oct 21, 2024

I've been reading stories here from time to time, and I believe this was the best-crafted and most meaningful piece I have seen. I'm looking forward to your future work.

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Kate Simkins
15:01 Oct 21, 2024

🙏

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19:20 Oct 20, 2024

I love this story. Well done, Kate. Great writing. 🧡

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Kate Simkins
19:30 Oct 20, 2024

Thank you 😊

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Jennifer Spagnol
05:03 Oct 20, 2024

Beautiful. Just beautiful

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Kate Simkins
07:47 Oct 20, 2024

Thank you ☺️

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Jeanette Harris
01:15 Oct 20, 2024

I like how it started Georgia is reading newspaper and Elise and start talking about their families good job

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Kate Simkins
07:47 Oct 20, 2024

Thankyou! I appreciate the comment ☺️

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Charis Keith
21:23 Oct 19, 2024

was not expecting that. congratulations on the win!

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Kate Simkins
07:44 Oct 20, 2024

Thank you very much!

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Corey Melin
19:28 Oct 19, 2024

Very well done and quite touching. Especially when it’s close to home. It’s a life changing event. Smooth style writing. Congrats on the win

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Kate Simkins
19:30 Oct 19, 2024

Thanks! Winning was unexpected but delightful. Thanks for the comment ☺️

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Kendall Defoe
19:16 Oct 19, 2024

Incredible!

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Kate Simkins
19:21 Oct 19, 2024

Thank you! It’s appreciated ☺️

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