Dangerous Predator on Planet Earth

Good morning World 

 It is the year 2022 , nine in the morning . We are live with today's news. China has reported a new type of species has been discovered , it's been described as being potentially harmful . They have said it can swim underwater , fly above the clouds at abnormal speed , and run long distances . Most recent reports are saying that the number of such species are increasing at a rapid pace , they are also prone to spread various diseases . And no it is not a bat . Joe Biden has released a statement regarding this critical matter quoting “ the dream of many Americans will not be diminished by such species , we have become much stronger since Vietnam. I urge brothers , sisters , wives , husbands , fathers , mothers to stay calm . “ In addition to that Donald Trump has put out a tweet “ its all fake news “ .

                                     The Royals in England have announced that they will be residing in Buckingham Palace due to the investigation of the new type of species . Scientists from all over the world are working together to figure this out . Recent studies claim the species eat a variety of food of both plant and animal origin . Such species' psychological behaviour is similar to that of an eagle , observations show they are territorial , aggressive and are prone to attack large mammals, deer , goats and unsupervised children . 

Since China's announcement , the Iberiian peninsula has turned upside down .

A quote has surfaced the internet and has become a new sensation “ we are in spain but the s in silent . “ J balvin has announced he is cancelling his world tour due to the recovering research announcing that the species are almost like great white sharks , they are speedy in the water , have long, sharp teeth, and their intelligence make them the most dangerous predator in the ocean . In relation to the breed , they are dangerous in the water and on land as they have the ability to contaminate it .They are also liable to bully other dolphins/races/whales , they are supremely effective killers .The new breed is dangerous to itself and to anyone that is around them . Festaurants have stopped serving pallelas due to emotional stress , clubs are refusing to play reggaeton and flamingo dancers have all lost their castanets . 

                                           Supplementary studies have been published in Portugal that the new found predators are common to blue jay birds , who are nature’s most gifted liars and manipulators .They do a great job imitating and when in a tight spot they lie to their own kind to attain their wants . As a consequence of the terrifying notícias , the recipe of pasteis de nata along with tram 28 has gone missing , a gente have forgotten what is the difference between obrigado and obrigada and fado performers are in hiding . The world's top researchers are hunting down the origins of such race , announcing that they have evolved from Apes , and have the skills to make and use various tools to hunt down mammals . 

     French professionals reported that it can turn cold blooded like reptiles when interrogated .Hence The french have stopped smoking , tour Eiffel hasn't lit up at night since the news and mona lisa has been reported to be clearly frowning since the last time visited . On the bright side , forensic scientists have begun to create a sketch of the race . They have described its facial features being like Boule de pain, french traditional round loaf . 

In Italy further inspections of the predator have changed from being potentially harmful to hazardous .The European union has advised all countries to go into lockdown , wear face coverings and stay metres apart .Science labs are doing their best to create a vaccine to protect us from the unknown . Fear has crippled its way through all italians pizzerias causing them to burn crusts , in addition the leaning tower of pisa is no longer leaning .The new species is proven to have communication skills of a parrot , we urge the public not to believe everything they say as it may not be factual . New physical features of the predator have come to the surface , the predator is a vertebrate and its spine is similar to a prosecco bottle . 

Ireland's tiny president Michael D Higgins has grown three inches taller since the finding of the new predator .Researchers have notified the new race are inclined to reject their own kind like a tiger rejects her cub ,if they seem weak , different ,fragile ,or have a different chromosome mutation , it may be linked to the natural selection theory . Since the investigation, all the deers in Phoenix Park have disappeared , reports are saying they are travelling towards Canada like all irish hospital nurses , the Guinness factory has closed down , the Irish have stopped drinking ,no pots of gold have been found at the end of any rainbows this week . Finally the chippers have ran out of chips , and the price of Cod has increased . 

                                                              Countries in eastern europe are also being affected by the new discoveries . since the advancement of the predator , Russian president Putin announced he will continue to serve Russia for another century , he has stated “ vee are ready for var , dis is not a dangerous zpecies zee are american zpies “ , hours later he abdicated ( finally ) . As per usual , Russia did their own research upon the new findings , saying the predator can have multiple personalities , is responsible for the mild climate change , making small mistakes like nuclear power plants , wholesome killing in countries like Rwanda and petty crimes against humanity .Due to distress and agony caused by the announcements ,Ukraine has terminated the growth of beetroot leading to the diminishment of borsch and all dumplings are failing to rise when cooked in the pot . Moreover the species is said to have pentadactyl limbs as arms and legs . The Capital has banned chicken kiev .In Poland the phrase Dzień dobry! has turned into źly Dzień , Chopin's music has stopped playing in all theatres . Finally criminologists have named the most dangerous predator on earth as Hugh Man and have concluded their final draft of the predators physical features .All citizens including non tax payers are encouraged to keep an eye out for these measurements ,the prize for catching the predator dead or alive, preferably alive , is 1 billion worth of bitcoin . Lastly The president of the European Union has announced ,” don't worry, be happy , and let the hunger games begin . “