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Drama Mystery Suspense

Saturday 12:00pm – Nathan was out late with some friends the night before so he slept in that day and awoke to the sound of birdsong outside his bedroom window and soon he was smiling up at his ceiling. He got out of bed, did a few stretching exercises, and then went out for a run. Upon his return he grabbed a towel, hit the button on his coffee maker and then headed into the bathroom for a nice hot shower. Today was going to be a big day and he was eager to get going.


Afterwards, he toweled off and got dressed in a nice white polo shirt, a new pair of jeans and the slick brown leather Magnanni shoes he received as a gift from his uncle last Christmas. (God bless Uncle Pete, that filthy rich son of a bitch.) He finished his coffee, responded to a few text messages from friends, then headed out the door and made his way to Lexington Avenue to catch the 6 Train downtown. The weather was beautiful, a perfect Spring day in New York. There was much to do and he was looking forward to all of it.


Saturday 8:00pm – Nathan discreetly looked around the holding cell at the other inmates around him, some seated and some shuffling about. Most were bigger than him (he was not a large man) and many looked like they had been down to Manhattan Central Booking at least once before. From the snatches of conversation he caught here and there, some were definitely alumni and knew what to expect a lot better than he did. He tried to make himself as invisible as possible, hoping that maybe the dried blood on his face and down the front of his white polo shirt might make him look a little bit intimidating at least. They had taken his belt and the laces from his shoes during processing and he just felt kind of silly now. He should have worn his slip-on Keens. Maybe things would have gone differently. Hopefully Uncle Phil would get the message he left and come through for him.


A tall Hispanic man with a shaved head, hard eyes and multiple neck tattoos told him he wanted that seat. Nathan got up and gave it to him without saying a word, drifting head-down over to a place as far away as possible from the other detainees, which wasn’t nearly far enough for his liking. In addition to his broken nose, he was pretty certain that he had sprained his right wrist and he had a nasty knot growing on his left knee from the fall. He didn’t need any more injuries tonight.


Saturday 1:00pm – The subway ride from 86th Street down to midtown was surprisingly quick that day and Nathan was actually whistling with happiness – whistling! – as he made his way across Park Avenue towards the diamond district and the small shop on 47th Street just off 5th Avenue. Along the way he made a quick stop at H&H Bagels for a quick bite to eat on the go. Just as he finished his sundried tomato bagel with lox spread, he arrived at the front door of the jewelry shop and Sol buzzed him in through the double security doors.


The cut of the stone was absolutely perfect and the setting turned out even nicer than he had expected. It was beautifully crafted and Tara was going to melt when she saw it. He had no doubt her answer would be yes (they had already discussed this more than once) but he really wanted to knock her off her feet that night after dinner at Nobu. He looked up from the ring and smiled at Sol.


“You are pleased, my friend?” Nathan just nodded and they sat down together to complete the sale.


Saturday 7:00pm – “Hey, Uncle Pete. This is Nate. Listen, I have a big problem and I don’t know who else to call for help. I can’t call my parents down in Florida. You’re the only person here in the city I can call who might be able to help. I was arrested this afternoon and I need a lawyer, and maybe bail money. If I can make bail. It’s a long story, Uncle Paul. I’ll tell you what happened when I see you but right now I’m downtown at Central Booking on Centre Street. I’m hoping you can send a lawyer as soon as possible. I’ll try to call you again when I can but please, Uncle Paul, I really need your help.”


Saturday 2:00pm – Shortly after leaving the jewelry shop on 47th Street Nathan’s phone pinged with an incoming text from Tara. Hey Babe, are we still on schedule for lunch? I just got my nails done at that little place on 36th Street. Where are you?


Nathan texted her back and told her he would meet her out in front of the Starbucks on 41st and 6th and began walking in that direction. When he arrived there they kissed, had a brief discussion of where to have lunch and quickly agreed on a little Greek cafe that they loved down in the West Village. Nathan hailed a cab and they were there a short time later. The Hummus and Falafels and Gyros and Dolmas were delightful as always. The weather remained perfect so afterwards they decided to find a bench in Washington Square Park to do some people-watching and relax outdoors for a little while.


Saturday 6:00pm – “Nathan Landry, you are under arrest for second degree murder. I know the arresting detectives have already advised you of your rights and you have confirmed your understanding of those rights. At this time you will be processed for intake to a holding cell here in Central Booking where you will remain until it is time for you to see a judge. Please don’t ask me when that will be because I have no way of knowing. However, it is a Saturday so the soonest would be Monday, but that depends on the court docket. At this time, I need you to empty your pockets on this table and remove your belt and the shoelaces from your shoes. When this is done this officer to my right is going to search you one more time for weapons and contraband and then we will bring you to your holding cell. Do you understand?”


Nathan understood. He understood, and he was terrified.


Saturday 3:00pm – Sitting in the park and soaking in the sun, Nathan and Tara talked about the trip to the Bahamas they had planned for the week leading up to Labor Day. They had been there together two years earlier and they were very much looking forward to their return. Tara wanted to swim with the dolphins. Nathan would be happy just sitting on the beach with a tropical cocktail.


Given the weather, Washington Square Park was busy with foot traffic that day, with lots of people coming and going, vendors selling various goods from table tops and groups of NYU students studying in the shade. The chess hustlers challenged everyone who walked by to play against them for a modest wager, as always. A prominent actor from the HBO show The Sopranos walked past them with a young girl by his side, presumably a daughter or maybe a niece. (This was a big kick for both of them; Nathan and Tara had watched every episode of that show together. They were grinning from ear-to-ear, each jokingly blaming the other for not stopping the actor to get a quick picture with him.)


Tara leaned over and kissed him then and Nathan felt a sense of inner peace and happiness that made the whole world seem warmer and brighter all around him. He had been planning to wait until after dinner but an impulsive idea occurred to him then. This was the perfect moment. He looked around to see if anyone was close enough to witness what he was about to do. (He didn’t really care, he just wanted some privacy in that moment.) Fortunately, most people were just quickly walking past in small groups, talking amongst themselves and minding their own business. There was an old man feeding bread crumbs to the pigeons just across the path and a teenage kid with black tattoos on the backs of both hands sitting on the next bench over – kind of grimy-looking in a stained old army jacket, no shirt beneath, torn jeans and dirty white tennis sneakers – but he was just looking at his phone and didn’t seem to be paying them any attention at all. The present situation was ideal.


Nathan withdrew the ring from his pocket and got down on one knee in front of Tara. He had already practiced his proposal at length and knew just what he was going to say.


Saturday 5:00pm – Nathan was cuffed in the back of an NYPD patrol car on the way to the local precinct and upon arrival he was brought into an interrogation room where he was handcuffed to a solid metal loop bolted to the center of the table. About ten minutes later two detectives entered the room, one in his early thirties and the other at least twenty years his senior. The younger cop pointed up at the camera facing down at them from its bracket in the corner of the ceiling.


“I know the patrol officers who picked you up at the station read you your Miranda rights but before we get started here I’m gonna’ do that again so we have it recorded, just to avoid any confusion later." He proceeded to read the Miranda warning to Nathan and then asked him if he understood these rights. Nathan confirmed that he did.


Then the older cop spoke up for the first time.


“So Nathan. Why don’t you tell us in your own words what happened down there in the subway station this afternoon? Maybe you can clear some things up for us. Maybe you can walk out of here if you do. Right now, all we’ve got is statements from about 20 different eyewitnesses on the subway platform and the reports from the arresting officers, plus the subway security video. That’s obviously not nothing, but maybe there’s more to the story. So why don’t you tell us what happened today?”


Nathan took a deep breath and hung his head.


SATURDAY 4:00pm – After Nathan got down on his knee and asked Tara to marry him she was starting to cry tears of joy before he even finished his proposal. He handed the ring up to her and he was rising to his feet as the street kid in the old army jacket jumped up and roughly snatched the ring from Tara’s hand and sprinted towards the park exit out onto Waverly Place and made a quick left heading towards 6th Avenue. Nathan was up and running after him instantly, his mind in a rage, Tara’s shouts and cries falling away behind him.


Nathan was fast – he ran track at Ithaca College – but his Italian leather dress shoes were not made for wind sprints and this kid was quick too. He also wasn’t shy about shoving people out of his way if necessary. He made a left onto 6th Avenue and ran out into the street a little to avoid the clutch of foot traffic on the sidewalk and almost got clipped by a fast-moving taxi. Then he ran into a large group of people waiting to cross the street at the next corner and this slowed him up. Nathan was starting to catch up when the kid quickly turned and ran down the steps to the 4th Street subway station. Nathan was right after him, praying that the kid wouldn’t have the perfect timing to jump onto a train car just as the doors were closing, leaving Nathan on the other side - he could picture this punk smiling and giving him the middle finger through the window as it pulled away - leaving him out-of-pocket for close to seven thousand dollars.


As he got about halfway down the steps he could hear the distant sound of a train coming towards the station and there were enough people hastily trying to make their way through the turnstiles that he lost sight of the street punk and started to panic. He scanned the faces all around him and then he saw one turn around to look back towards him when all of the others were looking towards the platform and the incoming train.


Nathan saw red and ran for the closest turnstile, shoved an older man aside with a quick apology and then jumped over it as nimbly as he could. The kid was trying to blend into the crowd again but when Nathan spotted him he started to run to the right, then realized that the platform dead-ended in that direction so he turned and started running left towards the staircase leading up to the opposite side of 6th Avenue. Nathan got a little closer but just as the kid was about to pull away from him into the crowd he ran straight into a tall, heavy man in a NY Rangers jersey who completely stopped his momentum.


With the kid just mere feet away now and at a dead stop Nathan was not going to miss his chance to end this footrace and recover Tara’s ring. He dove at the kid to tackle him onto the platform, but when he hit him down near the hips he couldn’t grasp his hands around the kid's waist and his quarry manage to awkwardly squirm away. Nathan fell face first, breaking his nose on the pavement, smashing one knee and twisting his wrist.


The metal coated surface of the platform running along the edge of the drop-off to the tracks was wet. Someone had spilled a good amount of soda or coffee or some other kind of dark liquid there. The kid twisted around a bit and his eyes went wide as he fell backwards onto the tracks just as the uptown D-Train express came barreling through the station, tearing his body apart down on the tracks and the prized diamond ring right along with it.


The crowd on the subway platform all around him stared in horror. A chorus of gasps erupted at once and one woman screamed. A younger girl who had been standing right there turned away and vomited. The women standing nearby on the platform all backed away a few steps but some of the larger men pressed forward and Nathan remained there on his knees trying to process what had just happened.


The next thing he knew a tall black NYPD uniformed officer was lifting him up and roughly dragging him by his shoulder to the nearest wall, which he was pressed up against as his hands were cuffed behind his back by a second officer who began reading him his rights. He stared numbly at the blood running from his nose down onto the front of his white polo shirt. His mind was reeling with the repercussions of what had just happened as they put him in the backseat of the parked NYPD patrol car and he wondered how he was ever going to be able to explain what just happened to Tara. He knew he had much bigger problems lying ahead but he couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that just a short time ago this had been one of the happiest days of his life.

September 07, 2024 03:51

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18 comments

Mary Bendickson
20:35 Sep 08, 2024

Dead ringer.

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Thomas Wetzel
00:19 Sep 09, 2024

I cut out the last second plot twist where the stone is revealed to be a cubic zirconium worth about $15.

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Mary Bendickson
04:30 Sep 09, 2024

Thanks a notable twist!

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Danielle LeBlanc
21:59 Sep 12, 2024

Loved this! You really kept me engaged with your writing; I wanted to and HAD to know what happened. Great suspense. And I am a sucker for a not-so-happy-ending :) Great work!

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Thomas Wetzel
07:14 Sep 13, 2024

Thanks for reading, Danielle! Glad you enjoyed this story. I think I might have an innate talent for not-so-happy endings. I probably read way too many pulp fiction crime and dark horror novels growing up. Most 12-year old kids aren't big fans of authors like Nelson Ahlgren and Arthur Machen.

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Danielle LeBlanc
14:48 Sep 13, 2024

I 100% feel you on this!!! I am (predominantly) a not-so-happy ending writer as well :) They are the most satisfying stories to write, ya know? LOVE that 12-year-old you was true to yourself!! Keep on rocking, keep on writing.

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Thomas Wetzel
18:57 Sep 13, 2024

Thanks, Danielle! Back at ya. I am trying to channel Elmore Leonard in my story for this week. (Not that I would ever put myself next to him.) We will see how it goes.

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15:26 Sep 10, 2024

The back and forth timeline worked really well and had me hooked, wanting to know what happened. Great way to tell the story!

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Thomas Wetzel
17:27 Sep 10, 2024

Thank you, Penelope. I appreciate you making the time and I'm glad you liked it!

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Carol Stewart
23:47 Sep 09, 2024

Really liked the back and forth timeline here - gave a sense of Nate's world closing in (and despite it all starting out so well and ending badly). Knowing this bar the details somehow made for a more intriguing read. Nice touch with the shoes/running.

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Thomas Wetzel
03:27 Sep 10, 2024

Thanks so much, Carol! I appreciate you taking the time to read this. I thought that knowing how badly the day ended without knowing why would be a compelling hook. Glad you enjoyed it and hope you are well.

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Kristi Gott
20:48 Sep 07, 2024

Wow! Great suspense story! Clever concept and fast paced story beats. Unique structure and format. Super!

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Thomas Wetzel
00:35 Sep 08, 2024

Thanks so much, Kristi! I thought this plot structure - juxtaposing the idyllic first half of the day against the apocalyptic second half with the two timelines converging - would be a good way to build intrigue around the critical event that isn't revealed until the end. I appreciate you taking the time to read it.

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Philip Alexander
20:11 Sep 07, 2024

I like the back and forth time stamps. Writing is simple and not overtly verbose. Easy to read and wanting to know the end. Good job.

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Thomas Wetzel
00:23 Sep 08, 2024

Thanks for reading, Phillip. Glad you liked it. I struggled with the prompts this week but I liked the idea of telling a story where the before and after are fully revealed before the inciting incident is exposed at the very end. Probably wouldn't be a very interesting story if it were just written in straight chronological order.

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Trudy Jas
13:41 Sep 07, 2024

Yeah, that put a damper on his day. Great story! Switching back and forth kept me reading.

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Thomas Wetzel
00:14 Sep 08, 2024

Thanks, Trudy. Only one corpse this week! (Technically not even a corpse. More like ground beef.)

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Trudy Jas
00:50 Sep 08, 2024

LOL. With tomato sauce.

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