It was, it is, and it will always be.

I glanced down at my screen for the 50th time that hour. You only texted her an hour and a half ago. Give her time. I sigh and look out the window, watching two blue jays chase each other's tails. If only life could feel that carefree again. Two best friends, always at each other's sides, roasting the other in the way only friends could. And you've done it again Angie. Wishing for the past to reappear. I shake my head. Is it really so wrong to long for the return of a friendship that had seemed to be rock solid?

*ding* My eyelids fly open. I look to the left of me, my phone glowing the soft blue hue telling me I have a new notification. My fingers fumble as I reach for it, the need to hear from her again unbearable. As I read the message, my shoulders slump.

"Don't forget to do the dishes tonight!"

A reminder from mom. Not the text I'd been waiting for, but a reminder I needed to see. I get up and walk towards the kitchen. 

It felt like the moment I closed my eyes the sun was beckoning me to wake up. I sit up in bed and stretch. A feeling of déjà vu passes over me. You had to go and dream about it again didn’t you. Well, she was the best friend I ever had. Does she notice the change in our friendship? Just a month ago, we hung out. Did the regular: watched a movie, got dinner. But it was different. She doesn’t respond to texts anymore, something that never happened. No more back and forth exchanges of roasts or even our food competitions. They seem childish, the things I noticed had changed, but that was who she was, what our friendship was. And it seemed like I was the only one to notice. She’d changed in more ways than one. Or maybe it was I who changed? Whatever happened, I wish it would all go back to the way it was. We might still “know” each other, but what’s worse: your best friend remaining your friend but changing in the ways that made her your ‘best’ friend, or simply losing them all together? 

One year. One awesome, unforgettable year it had been with my best friend. Exchanging songs, books, foods. Until it was all over. And the factor at hand? A change in schools. Suddenly, without seeing each other everyday, it was like our friendship never existed. But it had. And she was the greatest friend I could ever ask for. Everything about her was what I always looked for in a friend. She always cared, really cared, about what was going on in my life. But there was so much more to it. Words can’t really describe her friendship or the impact it had had on me. Words wouldn’t do it enough justice. 

As my eyes slowly close that night, an image appears under my eyelids. Disneyland. My lips curve into a smile. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth. I agree, though not for the reasons most people do. Disneyland is where I met her, my best friend. My BFF with a lot of B’s. That school trip was the first time we really talked to each other. As the only two loners of the lot, we were practically destined to become friends. A love for roller coasters, food, and books was all that was needed for us to start talking. Ride lines that normally feel hours long sped by with the stories we exchanged. As we walked back to the school buses at the end of the day, she piped up; : “Oh look! It’s your home!” I glance to where she’s pointing. A trash can. One look at my face and she bursts out laughing. Elbowing me in the ribs, she says; “Don’t worry, I only roast people I’m comfortable being around.” Those words could have started fireworks in the night sky. Grinning widely, I point at a lady’s shirt, with the words I Love Beer printed on the back. “Looks like someone stole your shirt,” I counter to her jest. She bursts out laughing. Ever since then, it was a constant roasting battle, never-ending until one of us couldn’t think of a come-back. That was the epitome of our friendship. 

After that gifted day at the amusement park, school felt so much brighter when we were with each other. Not only was she a wild genius who helped me with whatever I needed, she inspired me by her own actions. She was always herself, her nerdy, food maniac, book-loving self, without a single thought for what others thought of her. I realized, being her friend, she was so much more than what I had summed up about her character prior to our friendship. It was an interesting friendship too. We were so similar but strikingly different at the same time. We could be a science classroom’s example of “opposites attract”. She loved math, but despised writing. I loved English, and struggled with math. But we both loved the same songs and books. We were each other's “uncultured buddies”, discovering the rocks we’d lived under our entire lives. But the most important fact was that I could be myself around her, and she would never judge (roast yes, judge no). She was the only one willing to spend hours and hours on FaceTime calls with me, studying for finals together and making sure I was prepared for everything, even if it used up so much of her own time. Even after a school change, she was always there. Calls and texts were exchanged back and forth, celebrating friends I made at the new school and making sure I left anyone I was “too good for” (her words, not mine). Songs, books, and food competitions still resumed...

The next morning, waking up from this dream, I feel a warm bubbly feeling inside of me. I associated it with rays of happiness coursing through my veins. Maybe it was the magical workings of the dream, but as I sat there on my bed revisiting the same sullen thoughts I’ve had for months now, I realized it wasn’t fair of me to sadden myself over such a wondrous friendship. We had way too many good memories that couldn’t be spoiled by growing apart. And even if we might be distant now, nothing will ever change the history we had together. Nothing at all. Not even my own thoughts. My job was to always preserve the memory of that gifted friendship. With this newfound realization, I put my pen to paper.

Dear Ashie (yes, I know you love the nickname), 

They say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth...

https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/angeline-al/