I Can Taste My Spine

Twist. My toes splintered against the cement walls, some snapping up and others bending down. I couldn’t see them. There wasn’t enough room. I just guessed my second word, and after that, it was so tight.

My position was surely bizarre, but it was the only one I could muster. I could not stand upright, as much as that would have saved on space, for when I did, the ceiling lowered first. No matter what, I would be crushed. 

Karma. It was important for me to keep my eyes open, for when I got close, the walls turned a bright yellow and did not close so much. Still, my word was wrong, and the walls moved towards each other with me in the middle. I felt my knees buckle and the tendons in my shins straining. It was pointless to fight it. I had no strength. My voice only came in whispers now. 

My body was not my legs or arms. Those were just extremities to be pushed on, to break apart. Whenever the walls loosened, whenever I said the right word, my body flopped out, a marionette doll whose master abandoned it. I was only my brain now. My eyes, my ears, my lips. I was only the parts of myself that could perceive and communicate. It was the most basic form of myself, but the purest.

The fourth guess needed to be close. Out of five letters, I needed three close calls. Three yellow walls, at least. Green walls were even better. They were worth two yellows. I breathed in. My lungs were concave.

Shock. Good. At least the first letter was right. If not, my feet would be by my ears. The pain was there, but I was no longer present. If I were, I certainly would not be sane. It was a necessity that I lift myself from my body. I only wish I weren’t so contorted. No one would want to see me like this. This was not how bodies were formed. What was that? Four guesses? I needed to get it now. I had never gone past five. I was familiar with four. Not one past that. I suppose that was a good thing. 

Lucky. That’s how I felt, so I whispered it, my lips so close to the wall in front of me that my breath bounced back to me. It was light, ragged, and tasted like iron. I wondered why that was, but I had to see the walls. I had to keep my eyes open.

Oh no. I watched the walls flash yellow, yellow, gray, yellow, and yellow. Didn’t I get the first letter right before? Ah, I see. My mind was copying my body. This was terrible. I had a few seconds to prepare myself. Then, the creak of the walls began. Oh, how strange it is to have my body crush. 

The first thing to collapse were my shoulders. My posture was poor, so both shoulders turned into my chest. I could feel my heartbeat through my armpit. How disgusting. My hips shattered, nearly making me drown in pain. But I stayed awake. I had to. If I failed to guess…

It was hard to focus now. I miss only having my toes broken, my wrists destroyed. My bones were no longer bones. They were never given time to heal. I had trained them by now into being liquid. My body was amazing. It adapted so rapidly to my environment. My body was awful. It took no form except what the walls demanded. I suppose I had some parts left. My eyes. My ears. My lips.

But I didn’t want to speak again. Not yet. I wanted to wallow in this, just for a moment. What if I escaped this pressure? Oh, how I would enjoy that. But the sight of my body being released is something I did not want to see. I was not the parts of me. I was just my brain. I was my eyes, my ears, my lips. 

I couldn’t think of my hands, battered to bits, pinned against my sides. I couldn’t think of my knees. Oh, I didn’t notice the bones protruding from them. Covered in red. I couldn’t think of that. It was not my knee. It was just a knee. I was just my brain. My eyes, my ears, my lips.

What were the letters I said? My consciousness was fading. Now the room was coming for my brain, but I had to fight it. I had to stay awake. If I didn’t say the right word in time…

There was a flashing on the walls and I woke up. I don’t know how long I was asleep, but I had never seen the walls this color. Had I? Was this a warning? A countdown? What were the letters again?

I tried to speak, but I was too weak now. My head was pulsing, my lips were trembling. All my ears heard was blood coursing through my neck, and all my eyes saw was flashing red. I had to speak. I couldn’t speak. What were the letters?

It started with an S. Right. It had an L. Yes. There was no Y, but a K. I had to organize these letters in my mind, but my mind was being encroached upon. I was no longer outside my body. I was here now, and I could see a bone near my eye. What bone was that? My body was too broken to be repaired. What vowels were there?

Oh, yes. Ah, I think I have it. The walls flashed faster and faster. I had to say it. My throat was sore. I tasted only blood now. I swallowed it. I needed to speak. 

“S-”

It burned so terribly. It was worse than the crack of my femur and the smell of my half-alive body. The walls were flashing so rapidly that it was nearly constant red. I had to push through. I coughed and coughed.

“Sku-”

The creaking walls pressed my nose onto my tongue. My eyes popped. My ears sunk into my head. My teeth filled my throat. I couldn’t see. I couldn’t hear. I couldn’t feel. I lost.