People I like

I don't like Billy. Billy always says "thank you" to the waiter at the restaurant. After every sentence. What would you like to drink? Just a glass of water, thank you. How would you like your burger cooked? Medium rare, thank you. I think Billy should walk around in a clown suit.

I don't like Alec. Alec gives big tips. He understands how hard people in the labor industry work. And he feels he needs to do his part to help them out.

I like Ricky. I was walking behind him and he opened the door and just let it close in my face. He knew I was there, that little bastard. He just didn't want to bother holding it open. I can trust him.

I don't like Vicky. She's snooty.

I like Paul. I saw him once at an office party, in the corner all by himself. He didn't know who to talk to.

I don't like Maria. She's always talking about how busy she is taking care of her three dogs. She says dogs are better than humans.

I like Sarah. She has a skateboard in her bedroom that she's never used.

I don't like Mindy. When she talks in a meeting at work, she talks in a very slow voice, and really elevates her pitch. She wants attention, but will lash out if you give it to her.

I like Tanner. On the line at Subway he always tells the lady he wants to double down on the roast beef.

I liked a guy I saw once on the New York City subway. There was an open seat, and he and another lady walked towards it, in opposite directions. He got there first and just took it. Good for him.

I'm not sure what to think about Ronald. One time he showed me his collection of bottle caps. He had about ten thousand of them, in plastic bins. His eye twitches sometimes.

I like Jimmy. When we were in the first grade we used to play hide and seek, and Jimmy would always hide in the nook between the open door to the school, and the brick wall. Every single time. We always knew where to find him, and he was always the first one out.

I like Michelle. She walks around like she's a peacock, strutting her wings. But somehow it doesn't bother me.

I like Rebecca. We went a to a restaurant with about ten people, and she got her food served second, and she started eating right away. The guy who had it served first was waiting.

I like Willy. Danny and I were hanging out with him one night and he said he wanted to walk across a football field. We said 'How come?'. And he said he just had a feeling. So we went to the highschool football field, and walked through it. It was so empty.

I don't like Bryce. He thinks he's better than me.

One time I was at a stoplight, and a guy pulled up to my right and made a right turn on the red light. Then I saw him make a u-turn, and then another right turn back onto the road, to pass by the light. He saved about four seconds. He was funny, I wish I had gotten a better look at how old he was.

I don't like my neighbor Leslie. One time I was pulling out of my driveway, and she was driving through our street. But she stopped and waited for me to pull all the way out. I stopped too to let her go, but she wouldn't. She just kept waiting.

I like Anna. Whenever she walks past a guy, she looks down and widens her eyes, and opens her mouth just a little. She's such a sweetheart. Except when she gets mad.

I like Carl. Every time a pretty woman walks by, he points her out to me, and says something like 'There's another one!'. He's about sixty years old.

I like Julia. When she's nervous her whole face gets red. Like a tomato. Sometimes she tries to cover it with her hands.

I like Steve. I sat behind him in school, and he was always cracking his neck. It was really loud. He'd crack one side then the other, in the middle of class.

I used to not like Julio. I played with him in basketball, and he thought he knew so much. But then one time I saw him eating lunch by himself. It was some kind of meat stew. He looked like he was really enjoying it.

I never liked Doug. When we were kids I asked him what his middle name is, and he wouldn't tell me. As if he's so important.

I like Timmy. I remember in the first grade I saw him writing in his notebook during math class. He was writing down his favorite shapes. I remember he had tetrahedron listed as his fourth favorite.

I like Penny. Every day she comes to work with a banana.

I don't like Jason because he doesn't like me.

I used to like Benny. But as we got older he stopped calling me. So he can get lost, as far as I'm concerned.

There was this guy I saw once on an online videogame forum. He always had these crazy opinions, and would fight with everyone on the site. I really liked him.

I don't like Ellie. She always talks about how all her coworkers are so much smarter than her. Maybe I should say I agree.

I like Alex. He's always biting his finger nails.

I dislike Scott. During recess in the fifth grade he'd sit down with a few other kids and "talk". Not play any games, because that's what little kids do for fun.

I love Eva. I wish I knew why.

I like women who let me pay the bill.

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I don't like people who are too confident, because they make me feel insecure.