A Day In The Life of Charlie

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHARLIE

           It was the Atlantic’s cold waves which washed over Charlie that startled him into a new day. The morning high tide was slowly encroaching onto his soft, sandy bed. Soaking wet, Charlie scrambled onto the Seaside Heights boardwalk in the fading darkness of night. His head throbbed from the shenanigans of the night before.

Stumbling down Ocean Terrace, Charlie returned to his rusty Ford Pinto. After he grabbed a clean set of work clothes and a used towel from the trunk, he washed down two aspirins with a half-filled, flat can of Coca-Cola. This overnight parking lot offered free, semi-warm showers to its customers. The saving grace is that it had comparable camp ground weekly rates right on the ocean front. This was Charlie’s current home ever since his second wife kicked him out of the house two months ago.

Within the hour, crispy bacon, scrambled eggs, a short stack of butter milk pancakes drenched in maple syrup and a steaming cup of coffee was placed in front of him at the local pancake house. Charlie punched the time clock before 7:00 am at the Sunoco Gas Station which was a short walk away from the restaurant. He was the station’s premier gas pumper.

In New Jersey, motorists get their gas pumped by gas station attendants. Vehicles would roll over thick black cords by the gas pumps that activated a screeching, doorbell like alarm. Immediately, Charlie was at the driver’s window ready to render efficient, personalized service. More likely than not, Charlie would earn extra tips by washing their dirty windshields as high octane gas filled their thirsty tanks.

That day’s weather promised high humidity with temperatures in the mid-90s. It was this type of hot firecracker day that packed the beaches with tourists like canned sardines. The honky-tonk atmosphere of two mile, boardwalk in Seaside Heights mesmerize the summer throngs all season long. The Jersey Shore had universal appeal for all generations.

Seaside Heights sparkled brightly as a multicolored jewel at night. Its glowing radiance could be seen for miles far out at sea. Casino Pier rides always had perpetual lines. People hoarded prize tickets by the fistfuls to get the perfect pick at Lucky Leo’s Arcade. Barkers lured innocent passersby to entice them to gamble their hard earned money on their wheel of fortune for a top shelf prize. The aroma of sausage, pepper and onion sandwiches made everyone’s mouth water.

Eventually, families retreated into their small motel rooms. As the evening wore on, the adults came out to play. Lovers walked hand-in-hand on the moonlit boardwalk after a romantic evening dinner for two at one of the town’s finest restaurants. The adult night life unleashed its magical power over the waiting crowds. Prostitutes looked for their next John under the dingy, yellow street lights. For Charlie, the usual bartender always expected him at his usual seat at his usual time having his usual drink with his usual friend.

With eagle eyes, Charlie surveyed the local single scene in that nightclub. In an obscure corner of the bar sat a couple of attractive women. Eye contact was made and smiles were exchanged. The women whispered and giggled to each other. With a gentlemen’s gesture, Charlie bought these two lovelies their next drinks. The contemporary band cranked out the current hits of the seventies. Charlie lit up another Newport cigarette. Soon, his long-time friend, Fred, pulled up a stool next to him at the bar.

“Hey, Fred, we have a couple of beauties lined up for us,” Charlie said under his breath. “All we have to do is to make our move when the time is right. I just started to liquor them up.”   These two men had a standing bet as to who would score with any woman for the entire night. Fred won the last two times.

“Charlie, I will take the blonde bombshell,” stated Fred. “You can have the tall brunette.”

Unbeknown to Charlie and Fred, a middle-aged woman accompanied by her three hundred pound cousin entered the bar. This vengeful woman had it in for Charlie. Once she spotted Charlie, her eyes glared with fire. After all this time, she had finally found this filthy, rotten scoundrel. Mary and John took a table for two in a dark corner of the nightclub.

After Fred bought the fourth round of drinks for the ladies, Charlie and Fred sauntered over to their intended targets. Charlie and Fred had this well practiced routine down to a science.

“Would you two lovely women care to dance with us? My name is Charles and this is my good buddy, Fred,” Charlie asked in his debonair voice.

“Why of course, we loved to dance,” the women answered in unison. The blonde’s name was Tina and the brunette’s name was Linda.

Within moments, these two couples made their way onto an overcrowded dance floor.  Thick cigarette smoke filled the air. The band played The Carpenter’s, “Close to You”. Charlie had a beautiful lady in his arms once again. Her curly hair softly touch his face and he savored the musky aroma of her intoxicating perfume. The warmth of her body next to him excited him. Due to highballs, Linda was unsteady on her feet. Slowly, Charlie and Linda gently rocked back and forth in each other’s warm embrace.

Once back at the table, this foursome had a lively conversation. From a distance, Mary and John laid in wait for Charlie. As soon as Charlie stood in line at the bar to pick up more drinks, John was right behind him. As Charlie turned to make his way back to the table, John purposely tripped him. Charlie fell flat on his face while the highballs went flying.

“You, two-timing bastard. You and I have a score to settle for your wife, Mary,” John said in icy tones. “Get up and let’s take this outside on the boards. Now !” John kicked Charlie in the gut. Suddenly, the bar was silent and all eyes were riveted on these two battle axes.

Slowly, Charlie arose to his knees as he fumbled through his pocket to find a pen knife he carried for self-protection. Quicker than lightening, Charlie attacked John’s groin and was up on his feet in an instant. In paralyzing groin pain, John doubled over onto the wooden floor. He cracked his head hard on the metal bar on his way down. In sheer panic, people fled the area for their safety while the bartender called the local police.

Fred, Tina and Linda were stunned. Fred excused himself to help Charlie while Tina and Linda swiftly ran out the front door. Sneaking up behind Charlie, Mary whacked him on top of his balding head with her heavy shoulder bag. Dazed, Charlie spun around and grabbed Mary.

“I hate you, Charlie! I hate you, Charlie,” Mary screamed at the top of her lungs.

Once again, Charlie had his second wife, Mary, in his arms. This time, Mary was pounding on Charlie’s chest with all of her might; using both of her fists. With great effort, Fred pried them apart. Mary stomped on Fred’s foot with her spike high heels. Charlie barely escaped Mary’s demonic wrath. Once outside, he ducked into a long, dark alley. Seconds later, the cops barreled into the nightclub.

Successfully, Charlie gave the law enforcement the slip. Out of danger and winded, Charlie stopped to catch his breath. It was in the middle of a clear, star-filled night. Once again, Charlie found his refuge on a quiet, sandy beach. The salty air and listening to the gentle waves gave Charlie inner peace. The bright, full moon spun in circles around Charlie’s head as he passed out from sheer exhaustion.

It was the Atlantic’s cold waves which washed over Charlie that startled him into a new day. The morning high tide was slowly encroaching onto his soft, sandy bed. Soaking wet, Charlie scrambled onto the Seaside Heights boardwalk in the fading darkness of night. His head throbbed from the shenanigans of the night before.