Wicked World

It’s the morning. The clouds sit high in the gray sky that glows sickly blue as the sun comes up. Donna stretches, rising refreshed, ready to start the day. Her coffee machine whirls to life. Donna cracks open the machine’s feeding maw, a complex spring and lever system that splits the machine in half, revealing a receptacle the size of a shot glass protruding from the middle of the machine. She drops her coffee pod onto the receptacle, closes the machine with a loud pop, and hits brew. The machine whirls again, but it starts to chug and scrape. Out of the brewing nozzle the machine squirts a chunk of black sludge into her mug, followed by a steady stream of coffee brown liquid. 

“Weird,” Donna says to herself. She goes into her cupboards full of snacks and condiments. She finds a plastic container labeled “creamer.” She pulls out a packet and tears off the tab with both hands, grabs her mug, and squirts the creamer into her coffee. She stirs to combine and takes a sip, a wry smile crossing her lips, satisfied. Donna wonders about the machine, but there’s no time. She can’t be late to work. 

Donna steps outside, eager to get to work. She takes a deep breath - there is something on the air, a barbeque? Someone grilling? At this hour? Donna makes her way to the train, scrolling through her phone. 

Headline, “Northern Fires Under Control, City Safe.”  She remembers, there’s a fire burning in some distant forest, creeping ever closer to the city. But there have been fires burning Donna’s whole life. Next year will be better, no need to panic. 

Donna arrives at the train station. 20 minute wait. She knew she should have left earlier. A ding-dong comes over the loudspeaker. Crystal clear, a pleasant female voice announces, “Try our new premium train service, perfect for the citizen on the go! For the low price of 5.99 for a single ride, 14.99 a month, or 180 annually, you can reserve a ride on a train every ten minutes! Get to where you need to go faster. Courtesy of the OMNI Corp.” A second, garbled announcement comes over the speaker, as if from a completely different audio source. Donna thinks she can make it out, “due to a police investigation, all southbound trains are running with delays.” Donna opens her banking app and taps the turnstile just this once. 

Donna gets to her office at the Ultraviolet Corporation where she works as a customer service representative for the corporation’s Wi-Fi sales. She’s just been promoted to the day shift. As she makes for her desk she can hear her new boss on the phone with a customer. 

“I hear you, but for that package there’s nothing we can do. Can I interest you in an upgrade? No, unfortunately speeds are capped for your location. I hear you, but there’s nothing we can do. Can I interest you in an upgrade? No, unfortunately speeds are capped for your location. I hear you, but there’s nothing we can do. Now, can I interest you in an upgrade?” 

Donna takes a seat at her desk. It’s the same desk she had when she worked the night shift, but you wouldn’t know it. The office desks are shared shift to shift, and the company prohibits any personalization. Every desk in the office looks exactly the same - only the worker is different. Donna pulls a notebook from her desk and sets it in front of her. She gets a call.

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here! Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” Donna answers, chipperly. 

“Hi Representative Donna, it’s me, Carlos Gomez,” a male voice answers.

“Hi Mr. Gomez, how are you today?” Donna responds.

“I’m good, Representative Donna. Can I ask you, Representative Donna, do you know why the Ultraviolets keep pumping those sonic frequencies through my phone?” Carlos asks, earnestly. 

“I’m sorry to hear you’re having an issue with your phone service, Mr. Gomez, would you like me to refer you to a technician?” Donna offers warmly. 

“Yes, Representative Donna, thank you. You know those sonic frequencies, they put that smell on me. I can’t get the smell off. Do you think a technician can help me with the smell?”

“I’m not sure, Mr. Gomez, but I can check for you. Is it just the issue with your phone?”

“Yeah, Representative Donna, my phone and the carpet. I think it’s the Wi-Fi. Can you tell the Ultraviolence to stop?” 

“I’m not sure what you mean by that, Mr. Gomez. Do you mean Ultraviolet Corporation? Do you want to stop your service?”

“Alright, Representative Donna. You can tell the technicians I will be waiting for them. I gotta get this smell out of my phone. Thank you, Representative Donna, for your time. It was lovely chatting to you,” not a hint of sarcasm in Carlos’s voice. 

“And it was a pleasure speaking to you, Mr. Gomez! Have a great day.” 

Mr. Gomez is a long-time client of Donna’s. She’s sold him Wi-Fi service for the last five years, ever since he called that one night looking for someone to pick him up from the hospital. He calls every day now. 

It’s the afternoon. Donna receives a call on her office line. 

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here! Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” 

“You absolutely fucking cannot. Let me ask you, why am I paying 89.99 a month if I can’t even get three fucking bars in my own living room?” A furious man yells at Donna over the phone.

“I’m sorry to hear that, sir, can I ask what package you have with us?” Donna tries to be diplomatic. 

“I’m paying for a Double-Premium package. Double-Premium, do you hear me? I need service in my home, so give me the service I’m paying for!”

“I’m so sorry, sir, but it does look like the Double-Premium package has been discontinued. I’m looking at your address here, and it does appear that there are speed caps in your area. If you want to keep your previous service there will be an additional 9.99 surcharge to avoid the cap. However, for 109.99, you can upgrade to our Double-Platinum package, which will give you guaranteed bars and no speed cap for the lifetime of your policy! Can I interest you in an upgrade?”

It’s the evening. Donna worked a double shift - she needs the money. On her way home she picks up some fried chicken and eats it on the train. Once she gets back to her studio apartment, she collapses onto her bed, turns on the TV, and stares into her phone screen until her eyes fall shut. 

It’s the morning. Smog hangs low over the peaks of high and low rise buildings, illuminated in a warm, strangely beautiful orange glow. She wears a beige blouse and black slacks. Donna stands in front of her coffee machine as it whirls and screeches, coughing out a splatter of black sludge into a measuring cup staining Donna’s blouse. As the coffee dispenses from her machine it grows thinner, until the machine’s screech quiets and a pale brown liquid drips from the nozzle. Donna lets out a disgruntled sigh before sifting the “coffee” through a colander into her thermostat. She bites the tab from her creamer package and squeezes the milky slime into the coffee. Stir to combine. 

Donna changes her blouse, trading the beige for the baby blue. She grabs her fall jacket and steps out of her apartment. The air smells of fire. Donna continues on her way, scrolling through her phone. 

Headline, “Northern Fires Rage, City in No Danger.” Curious, Donna clicks on the article. Paywall, 5.99 to read the whole article. Nevermind. She sees her fellow citizens, hurried, their minds focused on their routines. They march to the train, same as her. 

The smell of smoke tickles her nostalgia, a memory of smoking cigarettes with her college buddies on the quad, before real life. Happier times. But she’d spent years of time and money trying to quit. No reason to give up now. 

Ding-dong, “Try our new expedited train service, perfect for the citizen on the go! For the low price of 5.99 for a single ride, 14.99 a month, or 180 annually, you can reserve a ride…” The garbled second message follows like clockwork, “due to a police investigation, all southbound trains are running with delays.” She can’t afford the premium train, not again. Donna goes to the normal service platform, another five minute walk into the depths of the station. She waits ten minutes, 20 minutes, an hour. Her train finally arrives, and she crams into the shoulder-to-shoulder car. 

She arrives at her office to her boss’s regular refrain, “I hear you, but for that package there’s nothing we can do. Can I interest you in an upgrade? No, unfortunately speeds are capped for your location.” As she walks past, he looks up from his desk, scowling as she passes. 

Donna gingerly takes a seat at her desk and pulls out her notebook. She checks her phone, two missed calls. Her boss makes his way to her desk. 

“Donna, you’re an hour late,” he chides her sternly. 

“I’m sorry, sir, but there were delays on the train. I got here as quickly as I could,” Donna explains frantically. 

“I don’t care about delays. Just get the premium service. How much overtime have you been working? What do I pay you for?” 

“It won’t happen again, sir,” Donna apologizes.

“You’re right, it won’t.” Donna’s phone begins to ring. “Well, are you gonna get that?” her boss asks, impatiently.

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here! Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” she answers diligently. 

“Representative Donna, hello. It’s me, Carlos Gomez. How are you?” 

“Hello Mr. Gomez. How can I help you today?”

“They keep ringing my ears. It’s the Ultraviolence, tearing the wires out of my walls.”

“Mr. Gomez, I can send a technician to your home to check on those wires for you.” 

“Yeah, the wires, they gotta be checked. It’s not right how they’re defaming me. Can you get the Ultraviolence to stop?”

“I’m not sure what you mean, do you want to cancel your service?” 

“That’s OK, Representative Donna. Thank you for talking to me, you’re the only one who talks to me. I’ll check in again and let you know how things are going. To keep a record, you know? So you can stop the Ultraviolence. OK, have a good day Representative Donna.” Mr. Gomez hangs up.

“What was that? You never, ever, offer to cancel a customer’s service.” Donna’s boss is furious.

“Yes sir, I apologize. It’s just Mr. Gomez, he’s a special case. I think he’s unwell,” Donna attempts to explain.

“If I hear you offer to terminate a customer’s service again, you’re out of here.” 

It’s the afternoon. Donna slumps in her chair, sad and angry that she’s gotten on her boss’s bad side. She gets another call. 

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here! Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” The greeting rings hollow. 

It’s the evening. Donna leaves her office feeling the grind of the day in her bones. She needs something, anything to take the edge off. Her stomach grumbles. Fried chicken again? No, something different. Burgers? Tacos? She gets a burrito on her way home. 

Donna collapses in her bed, scrolling through her phone, picking at her pale burrito until she falls asleep. 

It’s the morning. A heavy dark orange haze hangs over the city. Donna hoists herself from her bed, covered in burrito scraps. She groans, nauseous, stomach acid burning the back of her throat. She grabs her last blouse and pair of slacks, a mismatched orange and purple combination that she has no choice but to wear. Sick and tired, Donna shuffles her way to her coffee machine. It screeches and stutters, and like a cannon, blasts the black coffee sludge from the nozzle, catching her blouse again. Resigned to her fate, Donna leaves her apartment in her hideous coffee-stained outfit. 

The stench of burning trash and hot concrete fills the air, and she can barely see ten feet in front of her through the deep orange haze. What few people she can spot plod on with their day, some filtering the smog with face masks. Donna reaches into her pocket and pulls out a year-old cigarette. She lights up and makes her way to the subway station, scrolling through her phone as usual.

Headline, “New Fall Fashions, Wear Your Mask in Style.” Donna closes her phone as descends once again into the subway. She’s greeted by the regular OMNI Corp. refrain, followed by the habitual train delays. Whatever, she taps her phone and pays the 5.99. She can’t be late again. 

“I hear you, but for that package there’s nothing we can do. Can I interest you in an upgrade?” Donna takes a seat at her desk. A phone call, it’s Mr. Gomez.

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here. Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” Donna answers in a stiff monotone.

“Representative Donna! It’s me, Carlos Gomez.” 

“Mr. Gomez, if you are not going to order a package then I cannot speak to you today. Do you need an upgrade to your current Ultraviolet service?”

“No, Representative Donna, I need the Ultraviolence to stop. Can’t you help me?” Mr. Gomez responds, hurt.

“No Mr. Gomez, I can’t. Call back when you’re ready for an upgrade. Good day,” Donna hangs up the phone. 

It’s the afternoon. Donna gets another call. It’s the angry man from a few days earlier. 

“I can’t believe this shit. I called you just a few days ago and upgraded my service. Why the fuck can’t I get bars in my living room still?” 

“Let me check on that for you, sir.” Donna checks her notebook. She sees a yellow tab sticking from the back pages and flips to it. “Sir, I’m seeing here that the Double-Platinum service is no longer being offered. We’re offering discounts on our upgraded 9G service, scheduled for implementation for next year. You can pre-order now for 19.99 and it will put you at the front of the line for our upcoming top-end service. Can I interest you in a pre-order?”

“What do you mean it’s no longer being offered? You said the Double-Platinum service was good for the lifetime of my plan. I never canceled anything.”

“That’s correct, sir, the lifetime of a plan extends as long as the plan is being offered. Once we stop offering that plan, the lifetime of that service has ended. I don’t see anything currently in our offerings that provide the service you’re currently on at your current price point, but if you pre-order now you will get access to our new premium 9G service when it becomes available.”

“Fuck you!” The man shouts as he slams his phone dead. 

It’s the evening. Burgers tonight. Donna can’t seem to get to sleep. Her phone, her TV, nothing is helping quiet her nerves. She chain smokes cigarettes in her apartment until she runs the pack dry. She lays down, face up, and forces her eyes shut. 

It’s the morning. The city is ablaze. A raging inferno engulfs the skyline as the shattered husks of the high and low rises burn. Donna drags herself to her kitchen to make her morning coffee. The machine shakes and cries out as it processes her coffee pod. The brewing nozzle defecates a solid black sludge into Donna’s dirty coffee mug. She reaches into her cupboards for her habitual creamer. It’s expired. “Fuck it.” Donna squeezes a sickly green slime into her mug and gulps down the bilious concoction. 

A blast of heat smacks Donna in the face as she exits her apartment. The blaze has spread to her neighborhood. Charred corpses line the street, stepped over by the citizens on their way to work. No need for a coat today. Donna removes her jacket and flips through her phone on the way to the train. 

Headline, “Ten Fall Recipes to Shed the Holiday Pounds.” Donna enters the train station, greeted by the usual Ding-Dong. But something is different this time. The warm feminine voice announces, “To thank our loyal customers, OMNI Corp. is excited to announce free rides on premium service trains today and today only. Enjoy an on-time departure courtesy of OMNI Corp.” The usual garbled announcement follows, “due to fires, regular service trains are canceled. Expect delays on all train lines.” Donna crams like a sardine into the free premium train. 

Donna’s boss delivers his regular morning spiel. “I hear you, but for that package there’s nothing we can do. Can I interest you in an upgrade?” This time, his delivery is haggard, weak. His suit jacket is singed, his hair smoking. 

Donna takes a seat at her desk and pulls out her notebook. Red tabs everywhere. She sits and waits for a call. Hours go by, and nothing. Not even a call from Mr. Gomez. Concerned, Donna begins to dial Mr. Gomez’s number - she’s committed it to heart. Just as she begins to type, the phone rings. Donna answers, hurried. 

“Hello, Customer Service Representative Donna here! Can I interest you in one of our new high speed packages?” she answers with anticipation. 

It’s the Double-Platinum man. But he’s not speaking, he’s screaming, “AH! AH! AHHH!” 

It’s evening. The city is lit bright as the afternoon sun. Donna isn’t hungry, still nauseous from the day before. She lays down in her bed one last time, the room illuminated by the blaze outside her window. She lets out an uncomfortable sigh and dozes into sleep.