Thank God I Got My Boating License

Blood is thicker than water, they say. Meaning that the bond of family is stronger than any other relationship you have in your life. Whether that be a marriage, or a 20-year friendship is irrelevant. Still, a pretty intense phrase. As if the moment you pop out of the womb, every person you’re related to takes this oath to solemnly and truthfully swear to protect you until their dying breath. In all honesty, when each of my siblings was born, I made that very vow. That no person would hurt them. Till death do us part, if you will.

With only a 2-year age gap, Megan and I are quite close. We get drinks every Thursday to celebrate the impending weekend. As an introvert myself, dating or “putting yourself out there” has never been easy. A few dates here, a few dates there. Nothing stuck. The more things don’t work out, you realize that maybe you’re the common denominator. But I don’t mind my alone time. Megan’s husband, Jack, tried to set me up with one of his Wall Street friends and that had to be one of the longest and most boring dinners I’ve ever had. And our parents used to make us sit at the dinner table until everyone was finished with their plates. This included our youngest brother, Kenny, who would chew each individual kernel of corn because he was convinced there was no way it came out whole.

Megan, on the other hand, is quite extroverted. It’s something I’ve always admired about her. She’s daring and bold, loud and spontaneous. Constantly going after what she wants and never settling for second best. Because of this, I never really had to worry about her like I did with my other siblings who were always more naive. Megan often seemed like the older sister giving me advice to break out of my comfort zone and take a chance. On something, anything. Getting frustrated over my anxiety of the unknown. I can sit here and say I can’t help it, but we all know that’s just an excuse to protect myself from whatever it is that might be out there.

As the maître d’ and I spotted Megan from across the room, she put up her hand to wave. Her forced smile immediately set off alarms in my body. The knot in my gut didn’t dissipate no matter how many times she insisted everything was fine. Fine, she said. Every woman and every (intelligent) man knows that word is code for anything but. As the waitress approached us, a thankful expression covered my sister’s face. Like she had just bought herself some time to push my mind elsewhere. For the time being, I allowed us to enjoy our food and sip on our wine.

Another thing that differentiates my sister and I is her sense of style. Whether it be clothing or interior design, she’s always had a natural eye for what looks good. Since I’m thinking about jazzing up my master bathroom, I know Megan’s the person to ask for ideas. Her phone came out of her pocket as she started swiping through photos of design ideas she had saved in her phone. Her swipes were so excited and quick that she seemed to forget that there are some pictures a sister should never see of her little sister with her husband. Her anxious look made me think otherwise.

“Everything okay? You and Jack trying to spice things up?” Megan looked around the restaurant, almost checking to see if she recognized anyone. “What’s going on?”

“Not here.”

Sitting in the passenger seat of her 2024 Lexus, our silence felt like it lasted much longer than the mere five minutes that had passed. As her gaze finally met mine, the desperation in her eyes told me this was not a joke. Megan’s voice was soft but confident at first. But the more she divulged, the more shaky and weak it sounded. This person in front of me was not the strong, confident, unbreakable woman I’ve known my entire life. Between the smell of another woman’s perfume on his clothes to his fake business trips, she set up surveillance and caught him in the act. The photo. It wasn’t her, but him and his mistress.

My apologies and words of encouragement I know did nothing to help the situation. Selfishly, I’m thinking of myself. I’m the older sister. The one supposed to look out for the younger siblings and protect them from harm and heartbreak. I had broken that vow. When she said she still loves him, my jaw dropped. How on God’s green earth can she even speak those words? He had done so much more than be unfaithful to his wife and destroy their marriage. Jack turned her into an insecure shell of a woman with no self-esteem. One who wants nothing more than to please her husband even if he gets into someone else’s bed.

The angry thumps in my chest cavity slowed when Megan grabbed my hand. Her pleas to keep her secret are met with nothing but reassurance. Of course I would never tell anyone. That’s one of my strengths. As a child this was an incredibly useful tool during games with our siblings. No one could crack me therefore I always won. As an adult, it’s going to come in handy even more. In fact, it’s crucial.

For as long as they’ve been together, every Saturday morning Megan goes to Pilates then breakfast with some girls from her class while Jack goes on his boat for an early morning sail. The last four Saturdays have been nothing but routine. For them. I watched them walk out to their cars and kiss goodbye before parting ways to start their days. They’re both gone for about three hours before returning home. Sometimes Megan came home first, sometimes it’s Jack. But always around the 180-minute mark. That gave me a tight window to do what I needed to do and make sure nothing was left out of place.

Having been on their boat for Sunday picnics and many Fourth of Julys, I scope out the dock before making my way down to Aboat Time. His reference to Megan’s attempts to convince him not to buy a boat. She was afraid he would spend too much time away from home. Only it’s not the boat who’s the perpetrator. The boat isn’t some big yacht, but it’s not a tug either. So, I found a good spot to hide below deck. My knees scrunched to my chest while my backpack sat in front of me. When the time is right, I’d know.

About thirty-five minutes into the ride, the engine sputtered to a stop. Jack’s curses alerted me that the time is now. The timer on my watch said this is my window. The hatchet held tight in my dominant hand as I pulled the mask over my mouth and nose. This had to be quick and efficient. There can’t be any blood on the boat. My action steps are on repeat in my head as I take one stair at a time up to the main deck. Strike, bag, toss. Step. Strike, bag, toss. Another step. Strike, bag, toss. Last step.

Jack leaned against the motor over the rear of the boat. A quick glance around showed no signs of anyone else on the water in viewing distance. He was clearly too worried about his boat to hear anyone coming up behind him. One swift blow was enough to knock him out and fall to the ground. The black garbage bag got ripped from my pocket and wrapped around his upper half before any blood makes its way to the deck. I duct taped his thighs then his ankles to keep him from moving around if he were to gain consciousness again.

The anchor I was cursing about carrying in my backpack causing my back pain finally became useful as I duct taped it around his hands. Looking down at him, I felt stuck in a trance. Megan entered my mind and I realized that my actions were justified. He deserved this. You hurt my sister, I hurt you. Simple as that. A weight lifted off me as I pulled the black bag over the rest of his body and quickly tied it up with duct tape one last time. It took all of my strength to lift him over the side of the boat. The black mass slowly sank further and further out of sight. Once I’m convinced he was staying down there, I grabbed the plastic gas can for emergencies and refueled the engine. The hatchet in my backpack stayed bloody. I don’t want to risk getting anything on the inside or outside of the boat.

Driving Jack’s boat back to the dock gave me a sense of pride. I hadn’t accomplished much in my thirty years on this earth. I never started my own business or joined the Peace Corps. My name wasn’t on a building and my bank account wasn’t overflowing. Simply put, I survived. And I’d always thought that’s what I wanted. Being the introvert that I am, it's always come second nature to me, to just be. But with everything that happened today, I know I’ve fulfilled my vow.

“When you go out of your comfort zone and it works, there’s nothing more satisfying.”