Endless Summer

         “Don’t you see it?”

              “See what?”

              “Right there. The sun. It was setting. And now it’s rising.”

              “It’s morning, already?”

              Violet sighed impatiently, exasperated but also like, low-key kind of freaking out. “No, if it was morning, it would be rising over there.” She pointed at the opposite horizon, then scowled playfully at her boyfriend Jason. “Aren’t you supposed to be an engineering major?”

              “Not until tomorrow.” He flipped his hair and grinned at her. She loved the way it swooped in front of his face like that. “And besides, engineering has nothing to do with the weather.”

              “The sun isn’t—” Violet took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose to calm herself down. “You’re lucky you’re pretty.” She pulled Jason into a kiss. They tongued deeply, like only teenagers in the throes of first love do. Sometimes they would make out for hours. She remembered the first time she got beard burn from his stubble; a small scab on her chin that her friends made fun of her for. Violet had worn it with pride. This was what it felt like to be a mature adult.

              Jason pulled out of the kiss and looked over her shoulder. “Wait a second,” he said. “It’s getting lighter. Is the sun moving in reverse?”

              Violet wanted to scream in frustration, but she was just happy that she wasn’t going crazy.

              “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!”

              “No way. That’s impossible.” They both squinted at the sun. It was moving slowly, so it was impossible to tell right away. But they did both definitely recall that just moments before it had dipped completely below the horizon, bathing their parking lot in cool twilight.

              Their parking lot. It felt like they had spent the whole summer here, in the bed of his truck. Violet wanted nothing more than to be able to wake up one morning in Jason’s bed, wrapped in his arms, gazing into his eyes under pure white cotton sheets, like the lead in a romantic movie. But she was still just about to start her senior year of high school, and he was still living with his parents until he left for college tomorrow morning.

              Violet shook her head, trying not to think about that. She knew, intellectually, what Jason going off to college meant for their future. She was too smart to imagine that their relationship could survive the long distance combined with the temptations on campus during Jason’s freshman year. But she didn’t want their relationship to end. She had wished this summer, their last summer, could last forever.

              The sun was definitely getting higher. Its golden light bounced off the freshly painted monkey bars of the playground of the elementary school whose empty parking lot served as their rendezvous spot. In twelve hours, the blacktop would be covered in a winding line of vans unloading neighborhood kids in squeaky shoes and uncreased backpacks. But tonight, it was empty except for them. Jason and Violet lay in the bed of the truck, atop a makeshift mattress from a Costco foam pad, covered in a comforter he had pilfered from his twin bed, hoping his constantly disapproving, religious mother wouldn’t realize why it was gone. They lay tangled in each other’s arms, watching the sun.

              “I think it stopped,” Violet said.

              “I think you’re right.”

              Suddenly, Violet started thinking about the consequences. She had read so many headlines about climate change and global disaster. What would this do to the tides, the weather, the public consciousness? She started to get worried again.

              Violet pulled out her phone and shot a text message to her mother: “hey did you see what’s happening with the sun??? Is everything okay?”

              Then, after thinking a moment, “I’m coming home.”

              “Jason, can you take me home? I need to check on my mom.”

              Jason wrapped Violet up in his arms, but he didn’t make any movements towards leaving. “Babe, I’m sure it’s okay. Can’t you just look on the bright side? We have more time together! It doesn’t look like tomorrow is coming anytime soon.”

              Violet frowned.

              Jason kissed her gently. “Babe, why don’t we just stay here in this moment a little longer and enjoy the opportunity it has given us.”

              Violet looked down at her phone. Her mom had texted her back: “Everything’s fine sweetie! The sun looks beautiful. Are you coming home for dinner? Love mom.”

              Violet rolled over, so she was lying on Jason’s chest, looking at him. She tried to be the strong one here, the responsible one. “You know college is what’s best for you. Nothing has to change between us while you’re there and I’m finishing up here. You’re only a two-hour drive away.”

              Jason picked at a thread on his basketball shorts. “I know,” he said. "You’re right.”

              But neither of them believed it.

              Violet looked down at her phone to explain what happened to her mom, but now their recent text exchange was gone, as if it never happened.      

              “What is going on?” Violet asked.

              They both looked at the sun. It seemed to have settled into its pre-sunset position, not moving at all.

              “Babe,” Jason said carefully. "Do you think time is suspended.”

Violet looked down at her phone. It didn’t seem real, but she couldn’t think of any other explanation, and with Jason’s arm around her, she didn’t care. “It could be,” she said. “How do we find out?”

Jason started sliding his hands under her dress. “Let’s figure that out after.”

She giggled and slid down closer towards him. “After what?”

“Since apparently we have all the time in the world, I want to make the most of it."

Violet let him. Her mother and the rest of the world would have to wait.

***

After they had sex, they lay in the bed of the truck, looking at the sun hanging over the mountains. It definitely wasn’t moving, even though they had been back there for hours. It didn’t move during the whole time they watched Jason’s favorite movie (Team America), and it didn’t move during the time it took them to drive to Mel’s diner, sit on the same side of the table, and order burgers and fries. It didn’t move the whole time they walked around the downtown street and bought frozen yogurt (Violet got cake batter flavored with cookie dough, chocolate chips, sprinkles, and M&M’s on top. Jason got lemon sherbet).

They took the truck back to the parking lot and didn’t know what else to do, so they pulled up another movie (Sweet Home Alabama) and had sex again. No one bothered them, and no one had to be home for a curfew. Violet fell asleep in Jason’s arms underneath the sun suspended over the mountains hemming in their suburban town.

When Violet woke up, it was as if her dream had come true but warped. She felt like she had gotten a full night’s sleep, but she wasn’t gazing into her lover’s eyes underneath the gentle glow of dawn. The sunset light seemed to be mocking them with its vulgar constancy.

Violet rubbed her eyes, disoriented.

“How long were we out for?”

Jason checked his phone, but it still said 7:14pm like it always did.

“I actually have no idea,” he said, his voice starting to betray worry for the first time this evening(?) “We could have been out for minutes or hours.”

“Or even days,” said Violet.

Jason poked her playfully. “You have way too much energy to sleep for days.”

She laughed. “True.” But then they both got serious again. They were starting to panic and didn’t know what to do next. “Jason,” Violet asked, trying to keep her voice steady. “What’s happening to us?”

“I don’t know.” He looked concerned too. “Do you wanna… go eat or something?”

“No Jason, I don’t,” Violet snapped. “We literally just ate.”

But as if to directly contradict her, Violet’s stomach growled. She was so confused. She did actually feel hungry again. How long were they out for?

“I’ll drive us to Mel’s,” Jason said.

Violet didn’t want to go back there and get déjà vu all over again, but she couldn’t argue with her stomach, so she moved into the passenger seat of his truck for the second time that evening(?)

After dinner (breakfast?), he drove them back to their spot in the parking lot, and they didn’t know what else to do, so they watched another movie (The Notebook), then they had sex. It was as good as it always was, and Violet tried to take comfort in the fact that now she never had to leave Jason’s arms.

Eat. Movie. Sex. Sleep.

They repeated this routine over and over. Weeks passed, maybe months. There was no way for either of them to keep track. Any tallies they tried to carve in the truck weren’t permanent. They didn’t age. Violet didn’t feel herself growing fatter no matter how many meals of burgers and fries and frozen yogurt they shared together.

One day after dinner, she suggested they watch a gory horror film instead of their usual romance or comedy. Jason didn’t argue. They both just wanted to feel something.

Violet didn’t want to say it out loud, but she had gotten soul-numbingly bored with Jason. Their relationship had grown stagnant.

As they watched someone get disemboweled on the screen in front of her, Violet found herself jealous of the victim. At least they were experiencing something new. Even death sounded appealing to her in its novelty. Violet gazed at the curve of Jason’s jawline, the gentle stubble of his beard that never grew. She realized that she would never experience the love that comes from shared growth and experiences. Nothing between the two of them would ever change.

Jason paused the film. “Are you okay?”

“We need to get out of here.”

Jason didn’t argue. “How?”

“I don’t know.” Violet was desperate. If she could just get them out of this time suspension, she would be able to save her relationship. They could continue to move forward together, like she had always meant to.

Violet climbed out of the truck and walked into the middle of the street. She held out her arms and looked up at the sky, giving herself up to the universe.

“You win!!!!” she said. “I don’t know why you’re doing this to me, but I think it’s because you’re trying to teach me a lesson!! Congratulations, I learned it! I am okay with moving forward and I accept my fate. Jason and I are destined to break up. I am okay with that. I accept our future. Just get me out of here!!!”

Violet collapsed to the ground, emotionally spent, ready for whatever magic was happening to hear her words.

Nothing. The sun didn’t move from its post in the sky at all. Violet lay down in the street, hoping a car would appear out of nowhere and come run her over.

“Violet?” Jason asked. His voice sounded small and heartbroken. “Do you really mean that? I thought we had a future.”

“Look around, Jason,” Violet said bitterly. "We don’t have a future. We only have this over and over. I’m in hell.”

“Wow,” Jason pulled away, hurt. “I didn’t realize this was so miserable for you.”

“Is it not miserable for you?” Violet asked. “Don’t you want to see what else life has to offer besides this?” she gestured around at them, the bed of the truck, the sun in the sky that she had now grown to hate with every fiber of her being.

“Not really,” Jason said. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Violet said. “But I can’t spend eternity like this.”

“But we said—”

“I know what we said,” Violet told him. “But I worry if I look at you for one more minute, I am going to lose my mind.”

Jason recoiled. “I think you should go.”

“I think I should too.”

Violet climbed out of the truck.

“Violet, wait. That’s it?”

Violet turned back and looked at him. She realized that even though they had probably spent years together here, he was still just a child. “Yeah,” she said. “That’s it.”

“Where are you going to go?” he asked her.

“I’m walking home.”

“But it’s ten miles,” Jason tried to reason with her.

Violet gave him a sad smile. “Jason honey, I have all the time in the world. Goodbye.”

She didn’t look back.

***

When Violet climbed up the front stoop, her feet hurt. She was ready to collapse. She opened the door.

“Mom?”

Violet was hit by the smell of homecooked tuna casserole. It had been her favorite since childhood. The tears that she had been holding back finally came. She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed this.

“Darlin’!” her mom was just taking the pan out of the oven. She set it on the stove to cool. “I didn’t realize you’d be home. I’m glad ya made it. Didja get my text?”

“Jason and I broke up,” was all Violet could say.

Her mom came over to her and wrapped her up in a tight hug.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry. Come here.” Her mom knew better than to say any more than that. She led Violet over to the couch and they both sat down. Violet allowed herself to curl up into her mother’s arms and cry.

Mom rocked her gently. Violet was still in that position, sound asleep in her mother’s arms, when the sun set below the horizon and the stars came out. They twinkled with possibility in the night sky, on the other side of the walls of the house.

Sylvia wiped away a tear as she sat holding Violet in the darkness. She remembered when she used to hold her like this when she was a little girl. She spent hours wishing that tomorrow would never come. That her baby would never grow up.