A Love Like the Tides

The earthy aroma of a good cup of coffee fills the air. Left and right well-dressed people strut on the old roman street. Women with giant hats and long dresses, flowing like the waves of the ocean, young men proudly presenting their shining white shirts, waiters hustling through the sea of little tables filling the countless cafes lining the coast. From somewhere an old, Italian ballad glides through the air, slowly increasing in intensity, like the rising tide on a cool summer night.

Up above an endless ocean of blue extends. The same shade of blue as her eyes. Unsurprisingly they have the same effect on him as the clear sky. The longer he stares into them, the more he gets sucked in, swallowed by that warm, lovely blue. Eventually, it becomes everything there is, and he is comforted all around by that welcoming colour. That home-like blue. That thought of her.

“Are you alright?”, she laughed. “Yeah, sorry. I got lost in your eyes”. “Well aren’t you a charmer”, she sarcastically said with a small giggle. After slowly taking a sip from her cup she turned her head towards the ocean. The warm, Mediterranean wind made her hair flow like golden corn in a summer field.

“Have you decided what you want to do today?”, he asked her. “No, not yet. What about that bar you wanted to check out?”

“The one in the town’s center?”

“Yeah.”

“Sure we can go there. If that’s what you want.”

“Well it certainly beats the art galleries you always drag me to.”, she answered with a cocky smile on her lips. “Besides it’s been ages since we danced last time”.

“Yeah. How long has it been?”

“Since Julian was born.”

That was 19 years ago. Julian was their youngest son and had only recently left for college. This was their first vacation alone in 25 years.

The “bar” turned out to be a local pub, a sort-of second town hall for the locals, where dance evenings were organized every other weekend. The place was nothing of extraordinary luxury or splendour, but it had that one, certain thing cheap tourist knock-offs always try to replicate. Authenticity. The entire building was a leftover ruin from the roman times, including the wine in the basement that was probably just as old.

When they walked in, the party was already well underway and the small room was tightly packed with chattering people and ecstatic dancers. Luckily the owner still had room for them and led them to a corner of the body-heat filled room. They sat down at a battered table, that had been probably standing there for at least 10 generations. They ordered their drinks and merged with the dancing crowd.

After a while, she excused herself to the restroom, while he sat back down again, and sipped on his drink. I was then that someone caught his eye. A woman. She sat at the bar with the elegance of an ancient statue carved by a great master. Her coal-black hair fell beautifully onto the fabric of her wine red dress. To him, she instinctively stuck out of the masses, but he couldn’t tell why exactly she caught his attention. Until she turned her head and he fell into her hazel brown eyes. Instinctively he started to float towards the bar, as if carried away by a great wave.

“Hey! Is it really you?”

“How are you?”

“I’m…good- What are you doing here?”

The following five minutes were filled with plenty of catching up and laughter and ended in a promise to meet the next day. 15 seconds later he sat down again. Another 15 seconds later his wife came back. She never saw the conversation that took place. And he never told her.

The rest of the evening came and went with both having a wonderful time. That being said, there was the occasional sideward glance to the bar on his part, but the woman in red seemed to have suddenly disappeared. And after the last beer was drunk and the last dance played, the couple went back to their hotel. But as they walked through the warm night, sparkles of ecstasy between them, their thoughts diverged. She only thought of her love for him, but his mind was off with someone else. And these thoughts wouldn’t drift away till the next day.

His wife had wanted to relax at the hotel pool. He told her he wanted to “explore the city”. Where he really went was a cosy, little café on the shoreline, the place they had agreed to meet. As soon as he saw her in that powerful, blue dress the sea behind her seemed to fade away into a dull ocean of grey. They sat down and started to talk. He only looked and admired, so she began.

“So…what brings you here? Are you just visiting for business or are you here on vacation?”

“Oh, I’m just here on vacation. What about you? Just relaxing or…?”

“I’m just here to enjoy the food and the beach. My work just became a bit too much…”

“Too much what?”

“Work.”

He abruptly started giggling with all the seriousness of canned laughter and didn’t stop for the entirety of half a minute. All the while she only responded to his sudden outburst with a polite smile and a slightly concerned look.

“So…I have to ask. Are you alone here?”, he asked her while leaning slightly forward.

“Yes, I am. I just wanted to enjoy the sun and gift myself a bit of me-time.”

“Yeah, I get that.”

“And what about you?”

“Oh, I’m here for the sun as well.”

“Mhm. And…are you here with anybody?”

Despite him holding a warm coffee, his hands froze immediately. He looked at the blue sky and thought of a long, happy marriage, a relationship, that had given him everything he could ever dream of. A relationship like an old oak. Strong and tall with children playing underneath its branches. Then he looked at the woman sitting in front of him. Dressed in that blue and white dress, like a storm at sea, with pitch-black hair, like wild storm clouds. He fell into her brown eyes and only saw the old oak burning in a passionate firestorm. With this answer, he would make a choice.

“No. I’m here alone.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah…it’s nice, that we’ve met then. It was getting a bit lonely anyway.”

“Mhm.”

“I still have a week left here. Do you wanna go out again some time?”

“Yeah, sure, why not.”

“Great! What about this evening?”

“Sure, sure, sounds good!”

Later that day, he met his wife at the hotel bar. She told him, she would love nothing more, than to visit the neighbouring town this evening. He told her he was sick and wanted to spend the evening at the hotel. But, you know, she was welcome to visit the town herself. He wouldn’t stand in the way of her having a nice evening. Naturally.

The rest of the afternoon was dreadful. At least for him. She constantly buzzed around him, asking annoying questions like: ‘Is there any way I can help you?’, ‘Are you sure you’re alright?’ and ‘Just tell me, if you need me and I’ll stay here for the evening’. After 5 long hours, it was finally time for her to take the bus to the next town. And after a last ‘Take care of yourself’ and a final kiss, the door slammed shut and he felt like a great pressure had left the room.

After he was absolutely sure her bus had gone, he left the hotel and wandered through the life-filled, buzzing streets of the quaint, little town. The air was drunk with the potential of what the new night might bring and basically every street corner was filled with the warm light of a bar, a club, a restaurant, a café… And in this aura of vibrant energy and passion, he felt the most energetic, the most alive, the most at liberty he had felt in 15 years.

The place they had picked out was a trendy, new bar on the shoreline. A place with an expensive, luxurious and wholly unauthentic atmosphere. He entered confidently and took a long, good look at the guests of this place. It was packed with what was very obviously the high society of this small town. As you walked in you could almost smell the big yachts and million-dollar-vacation houses.

But his date wasn’t there. Or at least he couldn’t see her here in the front, as the bar stretched through the room and turned a corner. He explored around the room for a bit, the authentic floor boards creaking beneath with the sound of anticipation. The already far too old and far too ill-fitting suit from his wedding seemed to get tighter and tighter with every step. The fear that she had ditched him was already beginning to seep into his mind. What if she wasn’t interested anymore? Was what they had years ago completely gone? What if he had to spend the night alo…

BOOM

As soon as he turned the corner, it hit him like a tsunami. She was sitting there at the bar, Blue Moon in hand, in a shimmering, dark blue cocktail dress, like the goddess of the sea. Her mere presence was so overwhelming, he felt as if a great wave had robbed him of his breath. He went up to her, although he couldn’t exactly remember how, and stared at her for a good few seconds before she finally broke the awkward silence:

“Hey! How are you?”

“I’m…good.”

“Mhm. Good.”

“…”

“…”

“Do you want to order something?”

“Yeah sure.”

As the hours pushed on and on and their bill mounted and mounted, the conversation split apart into a million little, unrelated topics. To her, it seemed like they were jumping from place to place without actually seeing any interesting locations. The alcohol did help, however. It especially helped him with formulating his opinions:

 “Oh, I fucking hate them! They annoy me so goddamn much the little fuckers…seriously.”

“Mhm. I get that.”

“Come on tell me! What do you think about them?”

“I don’t…really care about them.”

“Oh, come on! Tell me! You have on opinion on them for sure! Come on!”

“Well, I think they are alright…”

By now his bill had long left hers behind. And the alcohol had clearly made its mark because by now he was basically having an imagined conversation with a way more talkative and drunk version of her:

“HAHAHAHA! Oh, so good…HAHAHAHAHA! Oh, amazing…”

“Well, I didn’t think it was that funny...”

“WHAT? Really?”

“Yeah. Anyway…it’s getting a bit late now, I think I’m gonna go back to my hotel and get a bit of sleep…”

“What? Really? Already?”

“Yeah, sorry it’s just, that…I want to catch a bit more sleep tonight, you know?”

“Yeah, yeah, sure, sure…can I at least like…go with you? To your hotel I mean…you know?”

“Yeah, you can accompany me for a bit if you want.”

The two got up, paid their bills and exited the bar, even though he didn’t really exit, he just sort of followed her like a drunk lap dog. The odd “couple” made its way through the streets. The partying masses had already relocated to the insides of the various establishment and so everything was now only dimly lit by the indirect light coming from the windows of the old, authentic, stone buildings. As all hotels and restaurants were concentrated within a small area in the middle of the town, I didn’t take them long to get to her hotel.

“Alright, this is my place. Thanks for walking with me.”

“Wa…wait. Can’t I….you know… come up? With you?”

“No, thanks…I’d rather…”

“At…at least…at least…a kiss…”

“Look, Iphis…I don’t know what you think this evening was..”

“A…a date? Maybe? Perhaps?”

“I’m sorry, but I’m just not…”

“Huh? What?”

“…just not interested in you. Sorry.”

“Huh…”

“Good night.”

“ok. Sl…sleep well.”

“Mhm.”

If anyone were to look outside their window at this hour, what they would see, would be quite tragic. The man, Iphis, sat alone on the pier outside the hotel, looking out to the black, cold sea with a little vomit on his suit. If you were to listen closely you could hear him quietly mumble in a drunken haze. The words that came out of his mouth were something incoherent between ‘What did I think? Idiot’ and ‘Fucking whore”. It was only after a long time that he got up and started to sluggishly stumble his way through the deserted streets.

“Oh, no! Has your fever gotten worse? You look terrible.”

“No, I’m actually feeling better than yesterday.”

“Lie back down! Don’t you worry. I’ll care for you until your better again, ok?”

“Mhm.”

His wife examined him from above with the caring face of an angel. As he looked at her he thought of the days that would come next. Relaxing at the beach, spending time together, being tended to. But when he looked into those icy, cold, closed off blue eyes, the only thing he could see was a never-ending, endless ocean.

A never-ending, endless ocean of contempt and disgust.