The Lonesome Ghost

Content warning: Themes of child neglect, and emotional and physical abuse.

Be careful what you wish for. She was woken up by the growl of her stomach. Her mother failed to prepare yet another meal the night before. She never bothered to look after her daughter, claiming it was to make her independent, just as she had to be. The girl sat upright and placed her pink Care Bear doll against her pillow, giving it a quick peck on its fuzzy cheek. She swung her feet off of her bed and walked down the hall to the kitchen, looking through the cabinets that she could reach. A shimmer of a silver, aluminum bag caught her eye, and she eagerly took the last strawberry Pop-Tart to satiate her hunger. As she munched on the sweet pastry, she turned to the calendar mounted on the refrigerator by a magnet. It was finally the day: October thirty-first. She wondered how her mother would respond to the question. Eagerly, she finished her breakfast and tiptoed to the end of the hallway.

“Happy Halloween, mommy!” She beckoned into her mothers bedroom. Her mother groaned in response, shifting under the sheets. The room was stale, smelling of smoke, dark and littered with piles of laundry. Sarah was not allowed into her mother’s room, she knew that, yet, spurred by her dwindling hopes, she entered still. Her feet padded softly against the carpeted floor to her mother’s bedside, hoping to ask her the question she’d practiced for days. She was finally “unpunished”. 

“Mommy...” she whispered, reaching toward her mother’s sleeping face, but felt her fingers brush against something cold instead. She desperately tried to catch it, but it was too late. The ashtray beside the bed tumbled, smacking her mother’s face and jolting her awake in a furious rage.

“Sarah!” Her mother sat up and gripped her daughter's wrist, “What could you possibly need at this hour?” Her intense volume made little Sarah flinch, her frail wrist beginning to hurt in her mother’s grasp. She averted her mother’s glare, unsure of what to do. She knew all too well that anything she said would only anger her mother further, and yet if she chose to not say anything at all, it would reap the same results. She wished she could disappear, to hide until her mother was no longer angry, but Sarah could only wait for what she knew would come. 

“Answer me when I speak to you!”

Sarah remained silent, still.

A sharp slap struck her cheek and rang through her ears, prompting tears to well into her eyes, but she knew better than to make a sound. With a frustrated grunt, she finally let go of poor little Sarah’s wrist and stormed to the bathroom to wash off. Sarah remained still until she knew her mother was gone. Once she heard the bathroom door shut, she took off silently to her bedroom, softly closing the door and hiding under her comforters. The tears rolled down her rosy cheeks as she attempted to muffle her cries. She cuddled her doll and traced the rainbow pattern on its stomach as the pain in her face began to numb, her hot tears slowing to a stop. She had gotten very good at stifling her cries. Her question was answered—she wouldn't be going trick-or-treating this year. Again.

As she sat quietly, wiping her dripping nose, she heard her mothers footsteps approaching. Frightened, she straightened up and turned toward the door, tucking the doll away behind her. She watched as the doorknob quickly twisted, followed by a blunt push to reveal her mother’s dissatisfied face. 

“I’m going out tonight,” she began, “You better be asleep by the time I come back. Understand?”

“Yes mom..” Sarah replied.

With that, her mother slammed the door shut, rattling the night light on the wall. Sarah exhaled, not realizing she’d been holding her breath. She hated being home alone—the dark house with so many windows, the silence that consumed her, the shadows that hid in the corners of her room. She couldn’t stay home alone again, especially not tonight. Sarah stood up and tucked her doll into bed,

“I'm sorry,” she told the toy, “I won’t be home tonight either.”

With that thought, her plan was sprung into action. Quietly, she pulled the white sheet out from under her comforters and sprawled it out onto the floor. She crept toward the door, pressing her ear against it, listening for her mother. Hearing only silence, she reached behind her bureau and pulled out a pair of scissors she kept there, just in case.

She picked a point around the middle of the sheet and cut two uneven circles, smiling to herself as she crafted her Halloween costume. She pulled the sheet over her head and made sure she could see. She excitedly spun in her room, feeling the flow of her little ghost costume. She took off the sheet and tucked it under her comforter, as well as the scissors, to hide them from her mother. Giggling to herself, Sarah picked out some warm clothes to wear under her costume in preparation for her night out. Now the only thing left to do was wait.

As hours passed, the soft glow of the sun crept down through Sarah’s window, and her mother finally came in to announce that she was leaving. Sarah hardly bothered to pay attention to what she had to say as her body was buzzing with both anxiety and excitement. She simply nodded along, prompting her mother to leave shortly after. Once she heard the door click shut, Sarah rose to her feet, eagerly dressing herself to ensure that her costume was perfect. The last missing component was the bag to store all of her treats. Lifting the head of her Care Bear, she pulled the pillow out from under it and removed the pillow case. She skipped down the hallway to her front door, standing on her tippy toes to reach the locks. With a click, the door opened, and she was greeted by an evening autumn breeze. 

The streets were enlivened with decorations and the chattering laughs of swarms of children. Her heart swelled at the idea of finally not being alone… 

---- Sarah ----

There are pumpkins on every doorstep, their faces lit up with candles. Every doorstep but mine. I want to go, but what if mommy sees that I’m gone? If I get in trouble again, bad things will happen.. The wind lifted my costume and swirled around my body, tempting me to go. I gripped my candy bag- the pillow case I mean, and hopped off the steps of my house, crunching on stray orange leaves that fell from the big trees surrounding my neighborhood. The setting sun was swallowed by the dark clouds in the sky, hiding the rising moon. The street lights began to flicker on, and I could hear other kids shouting “Trick-or-treat”. I ran to the house across the street and knocked on the door, waiting for someone to open it, holding out my bag with a smile. No one answered. As I peeked into the house through the window, I saw the reflection of a dark figure across the street. As It seemed to be watching me, I quickly turned to look, but there was nothing there. My stomach felt tingly and the hairs on my arm stood up, but I shook it off. I walked down the driveway and stood in the middle of the sidewalk, looking for any houses that were decorated, that must mean that they have candy.

“Hey, watch it!” someone yelled from behind me. I was shoved forward and tripped over the ends of my costume, falling onto my knees. 

“I'm sorry..” I started to say while turning around, a couple of kids wearing masks were stepping over me. Their voices faded as they walked away, and I was left alone again. I wish I had someone to Trick or Treat with.. I turned to pick up my dropped bag, when I heard footsteps approaching. A tall man dressed in a black suit and wearing a long black hat stood before me.

“Are you alright, my dear?” he asked while bending down towards me, his voice was scratchy and deep. 

“Um, yes..” I could only mumble back. He helped me up and I dusted off my costume.

“Um… what are you dressed as?” I asked.

“Why, I’m a magician!” he replied, “And you must be a ghost.” he chuckled warmly. 

I nodded under my sheet and gripped my empty candy bag, my hands sweaty. He stepped towards me and my heart started beating faster. I took a step back, unsure of him. 

“Would you like to see a magic trick?” He asked, taking off his hat. The man had very little hair and big eyes that filled his thin, dark face. His yellow-toothed smile kept growing as he continued to walk towards me. 

“No thank you..” I whispered. I felt my throat tightening and could hear my heart beating in my ears. I felt like running away, but I felt caged, like a rabbit under the magician’s glove.

“Trust me,” he said, a smile in his eyes “I can make candy appear out of thin air.” pointing at my empty bag. My breath stilled as he made his approach. 

“Can you really?” I asked him. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling at the thought of finally getting some candy.

“Well of course!” he beamed while leaning closer, “I’m a magician, after all.” He dug his hand into his hat and pulled out a Reese’s Cup. I quickly opened my bag and shoved it towards him. 

“And what do you say?” He asked, tilting his head,

“Trick-or-treat!” I said giggling. He grinned and dropped the candy into my bag.

“You know, you can get more.” He said while leaning closer to my face, placing a reassuring hand behind my back and pulling me towards him. His warm breath tingled my nose in contrast to the cold, misty air. 

“Really?” I do want more candy, I even risked being punished just to get some.

“You just have to come with me.” The man said while extending his hand towards me. I'm not sure if I should, but he really did make candy appear out of nowhere, so he must be a real magician. Maybe he can show mommy tricks and make her happier. Then maybe she could love me, too. I wiped the sweat off my hand and took his, my heart thumping louder in my ears as he held it too tight. 

“Um, mister? You’re hurting me..” I said, trying to pull my hand back. He squeezed my hand harder and turned to look down at me, his lips cracking as he smiled as wide as he could, beginning to laugh as he placed his hat back on his head, and pulled me down the dark, foggy street. 

-------

When Sarah’s mother came home that night, her intoxicated state prevented her from noticing the unlocked door. She slept soundly, and without interruption, which is what caused her suspicion in the first place. She called for her daughter a few times before exasperatingly rising to her feet. She stomped down the hall and swung open the door to Sarah’s bedroom, ready to scold her, yet was only met with a pink Care Bear lying in her daughter’s place. 

She searched every inch of the house, yelled down every street, and knocked on every neighbor's door, but to no avail. She could not believe her daughter had disappeared, just as much as she could not believe that it was entirely her fault. Realizing Sarah was nowhere to be found, she hesitantly called the police. As she waited for them to arrive, she lied in little Sarah’s bed, tracing the rainbow pattern on the stomach of the pink Care Bear doll.

 Of course, she was deemed to be at fault and charged with child negligence, but Sarah’s mother only truly longed to know what happened to her daughter. To understand if she had led her to run away, if she was taken, or rather, if she was even alive. 

But she never did.

The memory of Sarah's small, hopeful voice on Halloween night was her last memory. A memory that never dulled, echoing through every space in her mind, consuming her waking days.

Children are no longer allowed out alone on Halloween night. Unfortunately, Sarah was not the first, nor the last to go missing. Her disappearance case was thrown into deep storage along with all the other cold case files from back then. Forgotten, just as she was in life. The holiday has become a nightmare for parents and children alike, the joy robbed from them by the evil that lurks in the shadows. It was evil that took Sarah that night, the same evil that lurks within the darkest parts of all mankind. To Sarah’s misfortune, or some might even say luck, she was introduced to the worst of that evil for the very first, and last time on that Halloween night.