Once in a Lifetime

“This is just another of your fads, Jamie.” Alice wasn't happy. “Just like the rest. And expensive too. Two hundred for a telescope you never use. I’d hoped that was it, but now this. Five hundred miles for five minutes of darkness.”

“Four. Totality takes four minutes.” Jamie corrected.

“Call me a liar for a minute. You are so damn pernickety!”

It was important to get facts correct, but he reckoned you can’t argue about everything. Even when you know you are right. ‘The story of my life,’ he thought.

“You’ll enjoy it, Alice.”

“Hmph. You mean you will.”

“We’ll call in at your cousin’s on the way back. That’ll be nice.”

Alice smiled, then frowned. “And will you be borrowing more of Bob’s tools, by any chance?”

Jamie stayed schtum. Truth is truth. To argue otherwise is to raise the stakes on an already losing hand. Bluff all you like, but eventually the cards would be turned face up. She was right. This time.

Jamie drove on in silence, listening intently to the regular grinding and clunking that was the de facto ambient status quo of resurrected classic cars the world over. His pride and joy was a 1980 three litre Reliant Scimitar GTE automatic. Renowned for leaks and overheating, but driven by royalty. According to Alice, it was another of his fads. Those noises weren’t new, which was comforting, but as he listened he detected some additional droning. They were about half way there and this was the longest journey he had attempted in the car. With classic cars it was ten percent driving and ninety percent lying beneath. That was the fun! But what was now going on in the engine compartment?

Jamie decided to disguise his concern. 

“Alice, I really appreciate you coming with me. It really means a lot. I’ve got us a good overnight. I was lucky. Places near the line of totality are hard to come by.”

He paused. 

Alice was now the silent one. Did she know they were headed for a rundown Airbnb that nobody else would touch. 

“And it’s my treat. We’ll go on that beach holiday you want, next year. And it’ll be fun!” 

There was no sign that Alice had accepted his peace offering. Jamie tried again. 

“That couldn’t be fairer.”

Alice’s jaw fell open.

It was then Jamie's that ears deciphered the cause of the new droning. Alice was snoring. She sounded exactly like their gas boiler which was surviving on palliative care. The engineer had told them solemnly “I’m afraid she’s on the way out. I’ve done all I can. Next time I put the emissions analyser tube in her could be the last. I’ve done all I can, I really have.” Jamie squirmed at the impending likely cost. He knew that when the boiler packed in, the outlay for this trip would be regurgitated, declared profligate and irresponsible, then visited on him every time the Book of Wrongs was lifted to the pulpit of persecution. 

Jamie exhaled, controlling his breath so as not to cause a disturbance in the Force. He pushed his head against the driver’s door window, surreptitiously suppressing the rattle and buzz. ‘And it’s my money I’m spending,’ he thought, nodding as if he had delivered the ultimate riposte. He softened his grip on the steering wheel and relaxed into the joy of the drive. 

As Alice slept the fading sunlight flickered over her face and Jamie saw her as he might have if he had known her in her younger days. The golden beams tinged her long grey hair, reprising the blonde of her youth. Her resting face, too, seemed free of the tracks of time and the scars of life’s demands and woes. Jamie was absolutely sure. She had been the right decision. Pity they hadn’t met all those years ago. They would have married. But, there again, then Alice would have been the first of three in his divorce parade. Better this way when the wander lust had left, along with his options.

The sleep seemed to mellow Alice. When they arrived at the Airbnb she didn’t complain about its appearance. It was clean and comfortable and the host had left a welcome pack. Jamie was astounded after the many negative reviews he had read. But, some things just work out in your favour. It was a good omen. 

As they lay in bed, Jamie prepared Alice for the day ahead, and she listened, enthralled by his enthusiastic description. The way the sky would darken. The temperature drop. How wildlife would show confusion, with birds whirling wildly about not knowing if it was day or night. Automatic street lighting would come on even though it was the middle of the day. The thrill of seeing the moon eat the sun. The climax as it completely obscured the sun. The sun’s last gasp, the beautiful “Diamond Ring” effect when the final sun’s rays flared through the mountains of the moon. Then… Totality. The sun’s disappearance and the emergence of usually invisible stars now festooned around the black disc. Four sensational minutes. Then the laws of physics would command the orbiting bodies to return to their ordained offices. The effects would reverse. Normality would return. The show would be over, and the once in a lifetime experience would end.

Jamie and Alice took up their positions early the next day, intent on beating the expected crowds. They weren’t the first, but there was room for all. Round about them people prepared a variety of viewing devices to protect their eyesight. There were lots of calls encouraging others to get their eye protection on. Jamie had brought two pairs of special safety goggles which Alice found uncomfortable to wear and had to keep adjusting the straps.

“Well, I can’t see a darned thing through these goggles.” she said.

“Don’t take them off! You’ll see clearly when it happens. Look, here comes the Diamond Ring!.”

“I can’t see it.” 

Someone shouted “No. You’re too early.”

But Jamie insisted. “Alice, look down now. Look at me.”

“Down? I can’t see you.” 

“Take off your goggles. Look down!”

With a struggle Alice freed herself from the goggles’ webbing.

“Where?”

“Here. I’m in front of you. Down here.”

Alice looked down. There was Jamie crouching on one knee and holding out a small box.

“Alice, I have loved you since before we were introduced, and I’ll love you forever. Here is the diamond ring I promised you. This is a once in a lifetime event. Will you marry me and share every sunrise and sunset through eternity?”

The nearby crowd cheered. 

Alice hesitated. 

“How much did that cost?”

“After the sun and the moon, it cost the earth. It’s yours. Please say yes.”

“I thought we weren’t going to do this.”

There were repeated shouts of encouragement.

“Oh well, then. Let’s see if it fits properly. Go on, put it on.”

“Yes!” Jamie whooped.

Some of the crowd applauded. Others were appalled that the last few minutes of the astounding celestial event should be eclipsed by this mundane, outdated ritual.

“You’ve missed the best part,” one know-it-all admonished triumphantly.

“Who cares!” replied Jamie. “We’re off to see it again next year, at Copacabana Beach!”