"Growing apart doesn't change the fact that for a long time we grew side by side; our roots will always be tangled. I'm glad for that."

         It has been 25 years; 25 years since we last saw each other. Do you remember the last time?  It was at Lindsay's wedding; I was her maid of honour and you were a guest. You were there with your wife Meredith and your first baby who was just 3 months old.  I had not seen you nor spoken with you for five years.  We had a dance.  It felt good to hold you.  It was like the so many other times we danced together.  But it was only one dance and few words were spoken.  That was the last time I saw you. Oh, I had occasion to see you again but somehow we passed each other like two ships in the night because you were never there when I was.  Your excuse to your family was that you were too busy.  Living in a big city does that to people.

         Although we lived close, we did not see each other.  Soon you moved away.  You always wanted to write and you moved to a small town hoping that it would give you more inspiration to develop your skills.  And it did because your first book became a best seller and your career quickly took off. 

         Eventually I married and had children of my own.  You did not attend my wedding.  Your excuse was that you had a book launching in a far-away city.  I missed you.  I wanted you to meet my new husband.  You would have noticed how much like you he was, something that everybody else missed.  There were so many similarities that others did not notice; he looked like you when he raised one eyebrow; like you, he laughed at jokes that were not funny; although he loved music and loved to sing, he always sang off key just like you; and when he held my hand, his thumb always rubbed the webbed part between my thumb and forefinger just like you did.  But secretly I wanted you there so that you could see that I continued on with my life; you left me little choice.  

         Juggling my medical career with that of being a wife and mother kept me busy and soon my thoughts of you lessen even though the crack in my heart slowly grows.         

         At one time we were always in each other’s pocket, always at each other's houses. Our parents were neighbours and good friends and our closeness in age always threw us together.  Your mother had a little porcelain statue of two lovebirds.  She would always joke that they were you and I.  Do you remember that? We would both giggle and you would reach for my hand and say, “Someday”.  My heart swelled with the love of a child.

         You taught me how to ride a bike, how to fish, how to play baseball. As I grew older, you taught me how to drive a car, how to dance, and you screened my future boyfriends.  You gave me my first kiss!  My heart expanded with young love!

         But then, girls started to come around and you and I slowly grew apart.  There was always a girl tagging along with you and all of a sudden there was no time for me other than the occasional “hello”, or the family gatherings.  But even then, you always had someone with you.  My heart slowly felt a tiny ripple with a jagged end.

         I was the little girl next door, the kid with blonde braids that were always lopsided at the end of the day, a dirty smudge on my cheek from putting a worm on a fishing line, a scrap on my knee from a fall off my bike or a slide into first base.  I was the girl that you tried new dance steps with so that you could impress the older girls that you kept time with.  I was the girl that you practiced a kiss with.  Thus my first kiss.  Probably meant nothing to you but at that time, it meant everything to me.

         You went off to university and a few years later I also left.  After that our paths failed to cross although we kept in touch via the odd email.    You were never home when I was home and I only learned of your impending marriage through your sister, something that you never wrote about.  

         Yours was the only wedding that I missed.  I was attending school in Europe at that time and with exams, I could not fly home.  You did send a note thanking me for the wedding gift but failed to mention my not being there.  I think that is when I realized that there was no room in your life for me even as a friend.  The tiny ripple with the jagged end slowly moved deeper into my heart.

         Because you lived far away, you and your family did not attend all the family events, so I saw very little of you.  But life goes on and so mine did.

         Now 25 years later, we meet again.  It’s your dad’s funeral, something that you have to attend.  You do not have an excuse to not be there. But you are without Meredith.  After 15 years of marriage, you divorced.  I knew that.  I too am minus a spouse having lost him in a tragic ski accident 10 years ago.  But your three children are there, as are my four.  They do not know each other but they know the other children there and so they all come together to talk about parents, grandparents and family friends.

         Our lives have taken us in different directions and are well set.  You are now a well-known and successful author and I am a paediatric cardiologist.  Our eyes meet and yours sadly smile at me while mine tear up and I try to hold those tears back.  You slowly approach me, take my hand and kiss my palm.  I can feel my heart slowly healing, that jagged break pulling into itself as if someone was physically putting the pieces together like a jigsaw puzzle.

         “I’m sorry I left you for so long”, you say with your lips still hovering over my hand and your breath warm against my skin.  “Over the years, we have grown apart, but you were always on my mind and in my heart.  I have never forgotten you”. 

         You drop my hand and raise both your hands to run your fingers through my hair and pull my face so close to yours that my lips are almost touching yours.   My eyes close as I anticipate a kiss that has eluded me for many years and I am not disappointed.  The kiss is soft and warm and demanding.

         With your mouth lingering above mine, our breaths joining as one, you say, “Our lives always intermingled because of family. Family kept us together even though we were not together and because of that our roots will always be tangled.  I knew that you and I would soon meet again and our lives would entwine and we would become one, just like we once were.  And I am glad for that”. 

         And as I wrap my arms around his neck, I show him that I too am glad for that.