Hopeless

Soft, damp grass is what I was standing on. I looked down.

Pale, smooth skin covered my feet. A sharp noise made me look up but I saw nothing to alarm me between the rapidly flying tendrils of my red hair.

It was so bright; the sun shone intensely and I received all the fierce expression of her joy dazedly.

I took one step, and then another. The grass was really pretty. It seemed to shine.

“Lora!”

I looked up.

My reflection stared back at me in a cracked mirror at the corner of a room.

My nose wrinkled, slowly. It smelled rather awful here.

Where was the grass?

I took one step back, but was unsteady on my feet.

“I…” I spoke aloud. My voice sounded strange to myself. Was that my voice?

I felt a sharp pang of anger at the fact that I was now in a small, dim room. It contained a mattress - rather careworn - and sported stains of blood, and a desk with a broken lamp. Clothes were strewn everywhere and a bowl of dusty water was by the door.

I closed my eyes and the wind blew softly onto my face. I smiled.

The forest lay before me when I opened my eyes again. It progressively got darker in there as the eye wandered along the long, windy path that led into it. Although the trees were thick, and two vultures watched me from up high in one of the trees, my feet itched to explore the golden path that made me think of butter biscuits and caramel tarts. Caramel tarts, mmm.

A bird swooped by my shoulder, and I laughed. That surprised me; I had not heard my laugh in a while, I don’t think.

I ran, and heard giggles fall from my mouth, even as the branches of trees caught onto my streaming green dress.

I had not ran far before I came to a sparkling river. Not even if all the diamonds of the earth had been put together could they have sparkled more.

It was cool as I placed my feet in it - not too cold, and certainly not hot.

“Hi!”

I looked up to see the most beautiful girl that I’d ever seen. Her curly, brown hair fell far past down her shoulders.

“Hello, Lora.” She smiled.

“Hello.” I smiled back, happily. I felt that we were the best of friends already.

“Come with me.” She beckoned with a delicate hand held out to me. I trusted her, and therefore, I took it.

“How are you, Lora?” She was suddenly handing me a small box of chocolates as I looked up at her on a rather uncomfortable bed. There was that awful smell again. She sat by my side with a small and rather hopeful smile on her face.

“Really well…?” My voice came out tiredly.

Her eyes welled, and I reached up to touch her face. “Are you okay?”

“I hope I will be.”

I frowned, but her sad face morphed into a happy one rather rapidly, as she and I now bounded along the grassy banks of the sparkling river.

“Come with me, Lora.” She repeated as she tugged on my hand, and we proceeded to run. Where, I did not care, but I soaked up this moment of flying on my feet.

We tumbled down a hill of flowers, and laughed uncontrollably at our red faces, then took off running again.

“Where are we going?” I yelled.

She stopped running and looked at me so thoughtfully that I was taken aback.

“I don’t know.”

I frowned perplexedly. “You don’t know?”

“I’ll be back!” She laughed, and twirled on her tiptoes, disappearing as her skirt fanned about her.

I felt anxious suddenly.

I turned my head, and found myself looking out of a dirty window at the expansive night sky; it’s many stars winked at me, and I relaxed.

“Lora, Lora, Lora of Clamtown

Red hair, blue eyes

with her usual frown

gone? A-ho! A-ho!

She cries, she spies

and stares up at night skies

To look for the ever elusive

ever wandering, roaming and

rather exclusive

person of hope.”

I looked away to see a little child singing softly while dancing around a fire with a flurry of animals.

“What is hope…” I breathed out from my lips as I looked back up at the sky.

He giggled, and danced by me hand-in-hand with a fox, and then pulled me into the merry jig.

My feet moved of their own accord, and soon I was lost in a whirlwind of emotions, as we danced for minutes or hours - until the wolves surrounded us.

He cried in terror and seemed to disappear into night mist - leaving me to grapple with my own terror alone.

“Why?” I screamed - at my reflection, once again before the cracked mirror. Wide, gaping eyes, matted hair and blood on my cheek.

I cried.

“Here, drink this.” An old man handed me a cup of green liquid. His hood covered his face so I could not see him, and he lost interest in me after I received the cup. He continued playing his fiddle as the snow fell outside of the cave that we were in. Next to me was a sleeping bear.

He opened one eye lazily with a smile. “Hi.” I said.

He got up and walked away, then came back with a teddy bear in his mouth. A torn, dirty teddy bear.

“It’s missing an eye.” I felt an overwhelming sadness as I looked at it.

“Drink it.” The old man pointed to the cup that was still in my hand.

I knocked it down, and smiled at him. I felt rather strong after that. I got up and jumped out of the cave - falling, falling, falling - until I landed on a bed of soft feathers.

“Lora? Lora!” I heard panicked screams and turned to look at my curly-headed friend who was running towards me, but I slipped out of her reach into a cold stream that took my limp body down a tunnel of water that never seemed to end.

She followed after me hurriedly and called me sister. Sister?

But I was too far away from her now.

I finally came into the sun’s warm embrace again. I laid on my back with the soft, fragrant grass beneath me.

I relaxed.

I then turned to see my sister lying beside me, and she took hold of my hand tightly.

“Mother is angry.” Her lip trembled.

“You have such pretty hair.” I smiled at the curls that were so unlike my own.

She looked at me with a hopeless look.

Hopeless.

I looked back up at the sky, which morphed into angry, blue eyes.

Blue eyes? Not my own.

I was cold, since my blanket fell off me.

There was a sharp pain in my wrist - it was being held at a painful angle.

I looked steadily into those angry, blue eyes; they stared upon me with a twisted hatred that I couldn’t fathom, and I smelled the overwhelming stench of alcohol on her breath.

“Mother?” I asked, slowly. “Have you seen my sister? She was lying beside me by the river.”

I fell upon my mattress as she swung a large, glass bottle down onto my head.