THE CALMING INFLUENCE OF TURQUOISE
It was Labour Day, the last long weekend of the summer. All the kids would be back in school come Tuesday morning, dressed in their brand new back-to-school clothes and looking too cool for school.
It was the last hurrah of the summer, time to break loose and have a wild time before buckling down to long months of hard labour. Is that why it's called Labour Day?
Amy and I had gone up to the cottage for the weekend, three whole days of sitting in the sun, kicking back on the dock with the beverage of our choice, swimming in the crystal clear lake, eating s’mores around a campfire, and talking about the good ole days.
We had nothing of substance planned on our weekend agenda. The only plan was to go for a swim, have a Margarita, sit on the dock, have a Margarita, go for a paddle in the canoe, come back, have a Margarita. Eat s'mores by the campfire and have a … Well, you get the picture. We had both recently turned nineteen, our birthdays were only two weeks apart, but now we were of legal drinking age and planned to make the most of our long-anticipated and legally constituted privilege.
Amy and I had been besties ever since our parents had married when we were eleven. We had shared a bedroom, shared makeup and clothes, and shared secrets. I hadn’t seen much of Amy for a while now, not since the Big Divorce, but we were in constant communication, through chats, texts, and Emails.
My Mother and Amy’s Father had fallen out of love almost as fast as they had fallen in but had tried, for the sake of all the kids, to work it out. We had just turned eleven when our parents met, at, of all places, a dog park. After one month they declared that we were going to become the new Brady Bunch. A blended family is what I think they call it now, but I think it must be just an international reference to call a blended family the Brady Bunch after that famous sitcom from way, way back in the day. Or maybe it's just blended families who understand the cultural iconic reference.
Our dynamics were slightly different of course, my Mum had three girls which was the same as the TV show, but Eric, my stepdad, only had one son and two daughters while on the TV show, the stepdad had three boys, but you get the drift.
I was the youngest of my Mum’s kids, I didn’t have a lot in common with my oldest sister Megan; she was a major Geek, and she always had her head in some book.
Victoria, Tori as we called her, was the middle child and heavy-duty into sports. Needless to say, I didn’t have a lot in common with my two siblings being neither a female sports jock nor a geek. I think I was just your everyday, run-of-the-mill, garden-variety kind of kid.
Amy had an older brother, Jason, he was five years older and he was a hottie. I couldn’t believe he was going to be my “brother.” I certainly never had any sisterly love for him. He was my secret crush, which was a deep dark secret that I would take to the grave with me. Actually, I think Amy had an inkling, but I knew she would take it to the grave too.
Then there was Haley. Haley was two years older than Amy and never in the history of the world was there ever anyone as obnoxious as Haley. As a child, she was often offensive and odious, as an adult she took these adjectives to an epic level. She was a true Karen, an entitled princess who could never do anything for herself and complained about EVERYTHING. She had an emotional level that always went from zero to sixty in 3.5 seconds and even her father couldn’t deal with her. She was a complete drama queen and if there wasn’t any drama going on she would create it just to make herself the center of attention.
The transition of uniting two families was probably the hardest for Haley. My older sisters were close so they had each other. Jason was old enough to realize that his father probably needed a woman in his life and Amy and I were young enough to adapt and go with the flow. Haley however, was at that awkward teenage stage, which all the experts agree is the most difficult to adjust to the blended family scenario.
So because Amy and I had such a close connection that superseded blood ties, I had invited Amy up to the cottage for the long Labour Day weekend. The cottage was actually a beautiful Swiss Chalet that Mum and Eric had bought shortly after they married. It sat high on a hill overlooking the tranquil lake. We spent most of the warm months either week-ending there or in the summertime, when school was out, we would spend the entire summer there. My Mum was a teacher so she was free for the summer and Eric had his own architect business and could work pretty much anywhere he wanted, although he might drive back to the city every now and then when he had completed a project.
During the divorce, neither Mum nor Eric wanted to give up ownership of the Chalet so they came up with a rather novel idea about the ownership of the property which sent both their lawyers into a tailspin. They would both retain joint ownership of the Chalet. Eric would have exclusive use of it from April to July and Mum would have exclusive use of it from August to November and in the winter months when the chalet wasn’t used as much, it would be by mutual consent. So far it has worked out surprisingly well.
I had invited Amy this Labour Day weekend as sort of a besties get-to-getter, seeing it was my family's turn at the Chalet and Mum was at home preparing for school on Tuesday. Amy and I had always been tight, I actually felt closer to her than I did with Megan and Tori. We had so much in common. Amy and I would be going back to school at our respective universities come the end of the weekend so it was a great time to catch up on all the latest details of our first year of uni, relationships, summer jobs, and everything else under the sun.
Amy and I were chillin' on the wide porch, deeply ensconced in our Muskoka chairs with a fresh Margarita when a shiny, red, look-at-me Jaguar F convertible, drove down the long driveway music blaring. I looked at the car with curiosity but glanced at Amy when I heard her gasp.
“Oh, like, no she didn’t,” Amy said in her best imitation Valley Girl accent.
“What?” I inquired nervously, knowing full well that Amy only spoke like that when something had to do with, you got it, Haley. The only person we both knew who still spoke like they were living in the movie ‘Clueless.’ and used the Valley Speak dialect which no one else has used since ‘like, whenever.’” Haley always spoke in “uptalk,” which raised the inflection at the end of the sentence. She became addicted to this style of speech when she first heard the character, Cher, from the 1995 movie Clueless, use it. Cher became Haley's teen idol, and she had the character down to an art form. She was “like, totally” self-absorbed and spent every moment of every day shopping for clothes, jewelry and doing her hair and makeup. The only real difference between Haley and Cher was that where Cher was actually a nice person deep down inside, Haley was the devil incarnate.
“It's Haley,” said Amy. At my incredulous face she quickly said, “Don’t look at me, I didn’t invite her. Oh, Callie, I'm so sorry. What's she doing here?”
“It's not your fault. Just another episode of Haley Strikes Again. What's she doing here?”
“I told Jason and Dad that I was coming here for the long weekend and one of them must have mentioned it to Haley.”
“Well it's official, the weekend is totally ruined. It will be a weekend wreckage, a total travesty, a complete carnage”. All we wanted was to have time alone and bond like we did back when we were a family under the same roof.
Haley climbed out of her car, a pair of high-heeled espadrilles on her feet and wearing a sundress better suited for dinner at the Ritz.
“Hey girls,” she said, wiggling her fingers in greeting as she exited the car and minced towards the deck. “Oh, it’s so good to see you Callie, I haven’t seen you like, in…forever.” She leaned down and did one of those European “air kisses'' on either cheek. Next, she crossed to Amy and repeated the greeting. “Amy, sweetheart it’s been so long, like, months since we last talked.”
“Yeah? Months? Really? It's been two weeks since we saw each other. At Dad's birthday remember?” Amy said dryly.
“Whatever,” said Haley and waved her hand exaggeratedly.
“So what brings you up to the great outdoors? I thought that “roughing it” at the cottage was on your most hated thing-to-do list.” Amy’s voice dripped with sarcasm as she mocked Haley's speech pattern. “I mean, like, you might break a nail.”
For once, Haley actually recognized that she was being mocked and stuck her tongue out at Amy in a childish manner.
“Generally, that is true, but I stopped by Daddy and Jason’s office. I needed to get a little loan from Daddy, you know how it is. They actually made me wait for, like, forty-five minutes in their reception room. Can you believe it? Apparently, Jason brought in some big account and was doing a presentation of a big office tower to be built in the downtown core. Daddy let him be the project leader on this one and the two of them, like, ignored me, like, forever…”
Amy and I looked at each other and rolled our eyes. Even after all this time the entitled Princess act never failed to annoy.
“Well, believe me, I made Daddypay for that. I made him take me to lunch afterward. I was so ticked off, like totally. And he mentioned that you were coming up here for the weekend. I was, like, at loose ends so I just thought that I would come up and join you. A girl's weekend! So much fun, don’t you think.”
“Thrilling,” said Amy, her tone dripping with disdain.
The sarcasm was once again, lost on Haley, who either never understood sarcasm or chose to overlook it when it didn’t fit into her agenda.
Haley turned to me. “I knew you wouldn’t mind, sis, We were always so close.”
My mouth almost fell open in shock. “Sis? Close?”
Haley flopped in one of the nearby Muskoka chairs, “I’m like, so exhausted, Amy be a love and fetch my bags from the car won't you.” She glanced at the small table between the chairs and spied the drinks. “Oh Margaritas, I'm parched, absolutely parched, Callie be a pet and fetch me one won't you? Extra lime too.”
Amy sighed and went to do her sister's bidding, she knew if she didn't she would never hear the end of it. She reached the car and looked in the trunk.
“What's with all the suitcases, how much stuff can one person actually need for the weekend.”
“You know I never travel light, you never know when you might need something. Careful with that suitcase,” she said as Amy lifted up a bag. “That one has my shoes in it, they are Jimmy Choo.”
Amy, her arms full of suitcases, struggled with the load and dropped one of the cases.
“What did I just tell you,” Haley leaped to her feet, her exhaustion and accent forgotten. “You are such a klutz. Honestly, you’d think by now you wouldn’t be quite as useless as you were as a child. You are a bull in a china shop. Such a bumbler, such a dolt. Do you have any idea what a spazz you are Amy, always was, always will be.”
Haley watched as her sister laden with luggage struggled with the suitcases and bags and the door.
“Put them in the master bedroom,” called out Haley.
“Callies in the master” answered Amy.
“Ok, the blue room then,” instructed Haley.
“I'm in the blue room,” said Amy firmly.
“Well, why don't you just move into the green bedroom? You always travel light so you don't need as much room as I do with all my luggage.”
“No, I'm in the blue room. And I'm not moving.” insisted Amy.
“Whatever!”
I handed Haley her drink. I don't always see eye to eye with my sisters Megan and Tori but they at least were angels compared to Haley.
“ You sure were, like, skimpy with the lime,” said Haley staring at the thinly sliced wedge on the side of her salted glass.
“ I wasn't expecting company, now that you are here we have to stretch things further.”
“I'm not company. I'm family.”
She put the drink on a nearby table, and grabbed her makeup bag.” I need to freshen up” She headed to the washroom.
Callie and Amy headed back to the deck.
“OMG!” said Amy, throwing herself down in the Muskoka chair, “she's going to drive me crazy. So much for our quiet little weekend.”
I can't take all the drama. I mean, that's all there is with her, drama, drama, drama. Maybe she’ll get bored and leave”, I said hopefully.
“Are you kidding, she’s like a leach,” insisted Amy.
“What do you think she's doing here? I mean this isn't exactly her scene,” I asked.
“Who knows? She’s such a loose canon, she’s liable to cause damage,” stated Amy. “She’s…”
“ Uncontrollable,” I filled in the blank.
“Unpredictable,” added Amy.
“Undisciplined,” I added.
“ Unmanageable,” Amy smiled at our little word game.
“Unreasonable,” I improvised.
“ Unwanted,” said Amy finally and definitively.
“Bingo,” I agreed.
The sound of high heels on wooden floors announced the arrival of Haley. She had changed into another sundress, a turquoise halter style, high heeled sandals in a shade of turquoise one shade darker than her dress. Her necklace, bracelet, and earrings were an authentic Turquoise crystal set which completed the outfit.
“Nice outfit, headed out to a party?" asked Callie.
“Love the jewelry,” I added honestly.
“No, no party. Turquoise is a very calming gemstone, it helps induce internal serenity and soothing emotions and tranquility,” Haley informed us.
“Maybe I should get myself some turquoise,” mumbled Amy. “I think I might need some this weekend.”
“You could probably get some to align your chakras and stabilize your mood swings. Also, it's good for exhaustion, and has the power to prevent panic attacks.”
“ Mood swings!!!!! You think I have mood swings? That's like the pot calling the kettle black,” said Amy.
“I have no idea what you are talking about?”
I went into the kitchen and made another pitcher of Margaritas, then brought it out to the deck and placed it in easy reach. I felt I was going to need it. We all sat down on the deck and took a long sip of our Margaritas.
Haley was petulant and pouty, Amy was starting to look resigned to her fate, after all, she had spent her whole lifetime dealing with her sister. I was… I really didn’t know how I was, my stomach churned and I was experiencing brain fog. We all sat and from our advantage point, watched several small sailboats on the lake, their pristine white sails filled with wind. However, the reprieve didn’t last long. One moment Haley was watching the sailboat then she reached into her purse and fished around till she found her cell phone which was pinging repeatedly. She sat quietly for a moment as she read her text, and then the world as we know it exploded. Haley jumped to her feet, screamed loudly and threw her glass against the rail where it shattered into a million pieces.
My first reaction was, bet Haley is NOT going to be the one to clean that up.
“What’s up?” asked Amy.
“That rat, that dirty stinking rat.
“Who?” Amy and I asked in unison.
“Ethan. My fiance. He dumped me. By text. Can you believe it? Me? How can he do this to me? That worthless piece of…
“Did he say why?” interrupted Amy.
That old expression, if looks could kill, didn’t even come close to expressing the look that Haley gave her sister.
Could it get any worse? Apparently, it could. Haley picked up her chair and heaved it at the deck, then stormed into the Chalet.
“ Well,” I said, staring calmly at all the broken glass. “All I can say is thank goodness she was wearing turquoise to calm her down.”
“Totally!” quipped Amy as she poured us each another Margarita.
“That rat, that dirty stinking rat.
“Who?” Amy and I asked in unison.
“Ethan. My fiance. He dumped me. By text. Can you believe it? Me? How can he do this to me? That worthless piece of…
“Did he say why?” interrupted Amy.
That old expression, if looks could kill, didn’t even come close to expressing the look that Haley gave her sister.
Could it get any worse? Apparently, it could. Haley picked up her chair and heaved it at the deck, then stormed into the Chalet.
“ Well,” I said, staring calmly at all the broken glass. “All I can say is thank goodness she was wearing turquoise to calm her down.”
“Totally!” quipped Amy as she poured us each another Margarita.
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