Haunting Eyes

Content warning: Contains topic of grief and personal loss.

Can your eyes deceive you? Can a glance send you down the path to madness? Emily passed the bag of beauty products to her client as she left the salon. The sound of the doorbells chiming as the door closed was Emily’s cue to collapse into her seat. What a morning. Taking a deep breath, she dropped her head onto the desk, resting her eyes.

A break that didn’t last long as the phone rang in her ear. She picked up the handset and stared at the crowd passing the shop's front windows. The same bustle every day, all madly rushing to who knows where with their phone in their faces. Drawing her attention back to the computer briefly, she entered another facial booking.

At the end of the call, something outside caught her eye. All her focus locked on a face in the crowd as she made two attempts to hang up the phone. A cold shiver ran over her body. Greg? He disappeared into the crowd leaving her staring at the people walking by. It can’t be him. It’s my brain saying I need some food.

She scoffed the last of her sandwich as the salon door opened. She scanned the afternoon's appointments. Fully booked, I better get back to work. The earlier vision played in her head briefly before the client started gossiping about the usual topics.

***

Lunch the following day, Emily had a break as the client had cancelled. She leaned back in her chair sipping coffee gazing out the window when she jumped. Hot coffee sprayed over her shirt. It’s him again. The same sandy blonde hair and build. He paused on the street to let a blind person pass. His face turned towards her, and his haunting blue eyes looked back at her before he continued down the street. She froze holding her breath. It can’t be him. 

The memories of the hospital visits, his unconscious body lying in the bed covered in wires and tubes filled her thoughts. How she felt helpless staring down at his motionless body. I had so much I wanted to say. Dropping into her salon chair, tears welled in her eyes as the pain grew in her chest. She sighed.  I went to his funeral. She lowered her face, clenching her eyes as she fought to get that memory from her thoughts. It’s not him. You’re imagining it. It can’t be him. It’s been three months, pull yourself together. She sat upright, wiping her tears as she tried to get on with her day. But every time she looked back at the windows, she kept seeing the image of those eyes staring back at her.

The afternoon clients distracted her at times but her thoughts were elsewhere. Grabbing some Chinese takeaway on the way home, she flopped down on the couch. After a couple of mouthfuls, her dinner had gone cold. She stared blankly at her plate; the stranger’s face filled her mind. It’s not him, get the photos. He just looks like Greg. 

“I’m not crazy,” she said aloud as she reached for the box of photos.

The first photo had them both arm in arm leaning against his racing car. Her heart skipped a beat at seeing those same eyes again. Her memories ran back to that day. She could feel the heat of the tarmac, and the smell of burning rubber. The engines revved and the stadium shook as the cars screamed past. He was in the middle of the pack fighting to pass those in front. The deafening roar of the audience fell silent as the carnage unfolded below. Cars going off the track in all directions. The whole picture unfolded in slow motion before her eyes. The feelings of having her heart torn from her chest came flooding back. Dropping her head into her hands, she sobbed taking a deep gasp for air.

Curled up in bed, hugging a pillow she flicked through the television channels trying to find something to cheer her up. Why is he haunting me now? It’s been months.

Her phone rang. It was her girlfriend, Nikki, she always checked in at the same time every night. Tonight's talk went longer than normal.

“We need to get you out of the house. Want to go out?” Nikki asked.

“I’m in no mood to party tonight.”

“Tomorrow it is then.”

***

Over the coming days, Emily stood out the front of the salon at lunch trying to catch a glimpse of this mystery guy. The endless crowd pushed past but there was no sign of him. Was it all my imagination? 

Nikki walked up to Emily still leaning on the shop front. “Do you have time for an eyebrow wax?”

“Yeah.” Her eyebrows look fine, she is just checking up on me. 

“Why are you lingering out front like a busker?”

“Just trying to prove I’m not insane,” she replied pushing the door open.

“You’re not insane. You saw someone who looked like him in a crowd.”

Emily stirred the wax. Tears rose in her eyes as her hand trembled.

Nikki reached out with a warm hug. “Don’t worry about my eyebrows. You’re in no state to be playing with hot wax.”

Her hug was reassuring as Emily buried her face in Nikki’s shoulder. Sobbing as she let out her pent-up feelings. 

Patting her back, Nikki said, “You will be all right. It takes time.” She stepped back and added, “Let’s postpone your appointments and visit the competition for a massage.”

***

Later that evening, Emily stood at the bar waiting to order her drinks. Nikki was ordering their dinner from the kitchen.  Someone pushed in next to Emily at the counter as the bartender approached. 

“Two chardonnays please,” Emily said. She glanced over her shoulder to see where Nikki was sitting.

Turning back to the bar, her blood ran cold. Goosebumps rose on the back of her neck. I’m seeing things. Why am I seeing him here? Taking a second look, she froze wide-eyed staring back at him. Don’t touch him, he’s not real. She felt lightheaded as she took a long slow breath. 

He looked out the corner of his eyes towards her. “Are you OK?”

Shit. She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat, her eyes dropping briefly. “Greg?” she asked choking on the words.

His face went blank as his eyes connected with hers in a long stare. “Greg was my twin brother. Did you know him?”

“Twin?” She gasped, her body trembling as she fought to hold her feelings inside. “He never said he had a brother.”

“He was adopted. Our mother couldn’t handle two babies,” he said, “I didn’t know either until I saw his photo in the newspaper after the crash.”

A tear ran down her cheek, “We were dating when—” Her eyes dropped as she stopped herself from continuing, not wanting to make a scene in public.

“I’m sorry,” he replied patting her shoulder, “I’m in town trying to find out more about him.”

“Come sit down,” Emily said taking hold of her wine. The wine jiggled in the glass as her hand shook. He took back her glass, placing it on a tray with the other drinks.

While carrying the drinks tray, he followed her to Nikki. Placing the tray on the table, they stood together. Nikki was looking over the dessert menu when she glanced up.

“See you found some—” Nikki’s jaw dropped as she stared back at his face.

“Nikki this is,” Emily turned towards him pausing. What is his name?

“Matt,” he said holding out his hand.

“Greg’s twin brother,” Emily said.

“Oh, I’m sorry, take a seat,” Nikki said moving her bag onto the floor.

Seeing Matt sitting across the table talking about his life felt like an out-of-body experience. Like reliving the past but in a different reality. The tone of his voice and the way he said certain words was as haunting as his eyes. He is real, but it doesn’t make me feel any less insane.

We meet up regularly to catch up on Greg’s life. Matt looks exactly like Greg on the outside, but he is different on the inside. He is an office clerk with less risky hobbies. The more I get to know Matt, the less his eyes haunt me. Those spine-chilling feelings have been replaced with warmth and support. We have developed a close friendship. It is too soon for anything more. It may never happen but for now, I have someone to share my special moments with.

The End.