Guess What? I do

You were living life like she never existed. Like she was only a fragment of your imagination. You acted like you never knew her. Like she didn’t matter to you. All because you thought she didn’t. You wanted to move on. You needed to.

“What are you staring at?” Your girlfriend asks you as you looked towards the mountains. “Nothing, babe. The mountains are just pretty, that’s all. But it doesn’t compare to you.” That was true. Your girlfriend is stunning. But you miss her. She, who always occupies your thoughts. You wonder where she is and how she’s doing. But you can’t tell that to Brooke. “Come on, Aster. Let's go. I have my shift and yours is in 30.” You walk with her to McDonalds, where she works. She pulls your hand, dragging you there. She takes her place behind the counter, and you get in line to order. You order your favorite double cheeseburger with fries and iced caramel latte. When you finish eating, you go over to Brooke, give her a small kiss, and leave to go to Starbucks. You finish your shift and meet with your friends for a night of binge-watching 13 Reasons why, chosen by none other than Brooke. You hate it, but you will do anything to please her and make her happy. But, on the way to her house, you notice something. You notice someone staring at you, someone you recognize. You see your ex, Destiny Hale. She’s wearing glasses and smiling at you from across the street. Next to her is someone else you recognize. She points to you and whispers something to Destiny, who nods. You shake your head, thinking you imagined the whole thing and that it was a mirage. After all, it was summer. You look again to where you imagined Destiny and the other girl. When you don’t see them again, you shrug and keep walking.

The next day, you are tired. You stayed up past three am with Brooks and the others, and now you have to work the morning shift. Everyone’s going to be coming in and they need you to work. You get dressed and hop in your car. You walk inside Starbucks when you notice them again. Destiny and that other one. Then it hits you. Estelle Meyner, the richest person in all Kossland. What is she doing here? And with Destiny? You ponder. Once again you shake your head to clear your thoughts and once again they’re gone.

You see Destiny again and again throughout the week, but every time it’s only for a few seconds. Sometimes she’s with Estelle, but sometime’s she’s alone. You keep ignoring it as a figment of your imagination. Until today.

You’re walking from McDonald's to Starbucks like you always do, and there she is. You shake your head and blink, expecting her to disappear like she always seems to do. But she doesn’t. She’s still there. You thought she was dead but there she is, right in front of you on the street, smiling at you.

“Destiny?” You utter, just loud enough for her to hear you. “Yes, Aster. It’s me.” You stare at her in complete disbelief. “But I thought you died over a year ago!” Congratulations, you have succeeded to angering her. A dumb decision on your part to say that. “Did Brooke think so?” She says. “What does Brooke have to do with this?” You’re confused. She repeats herself, slow and loud. “Did. Brooke. Think. SO?!” “Well, yes.” “Did she say so first?”

Why is she bringing my girlfriend into the conversation? You think. “Umm. Ya.” “That’s the problem solved then. You never have your own thoughts, only follow Brooke around like a little puppy dog.” Her voice was sounded strained and was coated with sarcasm. “Don’t get me wrong, Aster. Brooke is a lovely girl and I’m a hard girl. They kicked me out of Ameil but then I helped Estelle who you must have seen with me. Here I am, alive and with sight, getting my degree in psychology at Havensheild university.” She throws all her accomplishments at you because she knows that you care. She knows that if you didn’t care a bit about her, you would have ignored her and gone for your shift. Which you are late for as she points out just then.

You go, but invite her for some coffee, which she readily accepts. “The coffee in Keimel doesn’t taste as good as the coffee here. How have I been surviving?” She comments as you get her favorite coffee. “No idea,” you grumble to which she shoots you an annoyed look. You watch her sit down at a table and forget your other customers. One of them calls you, snapping you back to reality. “Can I get a pumpkin spiced latte?” 

You finish your shift and rush out. Instead of going back to McDonald's or to someone’s house, you go to Destiny’s parent’s house. They let you in and answer all your questions with more politeness than you’ve ever seen from them.

You find that Destiny got surgery after saving Estelle Meyner’s life. She is, in fact, studying at Havensheild and she is very much alive. You notice some truth in Destiny’s words about you following Brooke. She is an amazing person; you admit to yourself as you leave and head home. She always has the best opinions and always kind to everyone. Well, not always Destiny.

Brooke was originally a rebound girl after you broke up with Destiny. But it stuck. Since your junior year of high school until now, five years later and the summer before she goes away to college. Havensheild, just like Destiny, but for interior design. Something she’s always wanted to do. So, she’s always been slightly jealous of Destiny. “Which explains the rumor about death,” you mumble to yourself. That night as you lay in bed, you think about the two girls. You know that you still care about Destiny. And Brooke. Two of the best people on the face of this earth. You don’t know what to do. If you tell Brooke that Destiny is here and not a zombie, she will go borderline mad. Okay, maybe she’s more than just jealous. What happened between those two? You recall that they were friends up till seventh grade and were practically attached at the hip. Always talking, laughing, and giggling. Why do they hate each other now?

Focus: Brooke

“Aster, who or what are you looking for?” You say as you notice your boyfriend’s eyes constantly scanning everything. “Destiny.” He mumbles under his breath, probably thinking you wouldn’t notice it. “She’s dead, Aster. Move on.” You say, your annoyance building up. “Ya, but I was kinds hoping she wasn’t, and that she decided to come back. I miss how we used to hang out.” He replies. You take him by the shoulders and turn him to face you. “Stop being delusional. Come on, let’s go!” You’re confused. He hadn’t so much as brought up her name for four years at least. Why did he care so much now? Was she really back?! Could it be possible she survived these whole 14 months?

You do some snooping around once Aster left. You go to Starbucks first, since you know that Destiny loved that place and ask a cashier if he saw Destiny at all recently. When he didn’t know who she was, you decide that he must be new in town and had come only within the last 14 months. Else he would know her. Everyone in Ameil did. Discouraged, you visit the three hotels in town and ask the receptionists if anyone with her description had come recently. At the last one, there was a ‘yes’. It was a fancy hotel, far more expensive than a blind beggar would have been able to afford. Or even her parents, if she asked them for money. You visit her room under the guise of her best friend paying a visit. But then you discover then she’s not there. Your mind’s made up that Destiny must not be there, but you check one more place. Just her parent’s house. If anyone knew if she was in town, it would be them.

They deny knowing if she was there or not, but her mother’s eyes keep sparking, the way yours does when you talk about Aster. This piques your interest and your resolve and determination to find her grows stronger. You look all over town before you glance at the sky while answering a phone call, a habit of yours. You instantly remember that she liked to visit the mountain every time she could, under the pretext that her sight would return, a silly girlish hope of hers. You jump in your car and head there. But something stops you just before you reach the edge of town. Destiny never did anything to you. She was an amazing person, but she got your boyfriend before you did, even when she knew that you liked him back in eighth grade. She never wanted to talk about boys, because she couldn’t see how cute they were.

But, you remember, you were the one to leave her. As soon as she and Aster weren’t a thing, you went to him and comforted him.

 Actually, it was even before that. You truly left her that day in freshman year when she asked you to tell her what was on the board in the classroom. Your mind started racing. She was already allowed to bring her laptop to class since she needed to record her notes. She was already allowed to have extra time to complete her exams and someone to write them for her. She had ears, wasn’t that good enough for her? There were people who were blind and deaf. Did she not realize that? She had so much, you thought, and yet she asks for my help. She never even helped me, you lied to yourself. You instantly went to sit somewhere else, but she notices and well, you’ve hated her since.

Yet, you don’t go forward. It would prove your fears right, that he still loves her. Then what would you do? If she was really there, would you have to convince him it was only a dream and if she’s not, that it was his imagination? You have noticed how he listens to everything you say, but this would take it too far. You may hate her, but you can’t hurt her.

You still decide to go see. And Lo-and-behold! There she is, your old friend and boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend, Destiny Hale. She’s there with someone you don’t recognize at first but then realizes that it’s Estelle Meyner, the richest person in Kossland. They seem to be in a deep conversation so you decide not to interrupt them but quietly get out of your car and eavesdrop on them. You can’t hear everything they say but can make yours, Aster’s and his friend, Tyler’s names in the conversation. You keep trying to listen to them, when they abruptly get up and notice you. “Booke? What are you doing here?” You stumble over your words and start twirling your hair. Your cheeks turn red and you wish that you had never tried to eavesdrop. Destiny and Estelle move closer to you are that only heightens your embarrassment. “She’s Brooke, Aster’s girlfriend, right?” Destiny nods to Estelle. “I came here to see if you were here. I just came and was about to come over and say hi,” You lie. “No, that’s not what you did. You’re lying, Brooke,” Destiny says You’re shocked. How would she have known? Only your close friends and family knew that your eyes move around every time you lied. But there was no way for Destiny to know that because she never saw that. “No, I’m not lying. It’s the truth.” She just shakes her head sadly. “There, again. Your voice becomes just slightly more high- pitched when you lie. Now, I’m not saying that you did anything wrong. Maybe just listen to our conversation, but you probably did that because of Aster. You wanted to see if I was alive, didn’t you? You wanted to prove your fears wrong that I was here.”

“I’d better go,” Estelle says. “I have to head back to Keimel tonight for an important meeting and you know how long it takes to get to Everton. Bye, D” Estelle waves to her and goes away.

“Can you come with me, maybe?” You ask Destiny. “Sure.” The two of you get into your car and you drive mindlessly. “Where are we going?” Destiny asks you. “Nowhere. This is just a lot to process at once.” “I shouldn’t be here.” She says. “This is for you and Aster to do together. The two of you should decide what to do about me, now that you know I never died.” “Ok, I’ll drop you off where ever you want me to. But first, how are you friends with Estelle Meyner?! And how are you able to see?”

She tells you the entire story. “Wait, a minute. You. Go. To Havensheild?!” You ask. “Umm, ya. Is that a bad thing?” “No, no at all.” You drop her off at her hotel and immediately call Aster to meet you at your house.

Focus: Aster

“Soo Destiny’s not dead.” Brooke starts the conversation. “Wait, you accept that?” You stutter in disbelief. “I did some searching of my own and now I know. How she saved Estelle Meyner and how she’s studying at Havensheild.” She says looking down. You lift her head up to find her eyes red. “Baby, what’s wrong?” You ask, brushing the hair from her face. “It’s just that I made some poor decisions as a teen and those decisions reflected on the people I love most, like you and Destiny. I know now that you still love her. I know now that for every time you cried and I helped, there was internal crying years later. Just like Newton’s third law, if you want it in science terms instead. I know now that Destiny did nothing wrong to me and I was wrong to her.” She puts her head down again and silent tears stream across her face.

“Brooke, you healed me in a way no one else ever could. Because of that, I no longer love her and I love you instead. Just like the third law of physics, in you want it in scientific terms.” She lets out a half sob, half-laugh. You know that you lied. You know that you want to be with Destiny, to wrap her in your arms, and to protect her from anything. And she would protect you back.

“You’re lying. Aster I love you too much to see you hurt. Go, go to Destiny. She deserves someone like you after how much she’s done. And you deserve her. Someone with her kindness and wit. Strength and humor. If you ever come to love me, I will be waiting. I’ve spent all my life pining for you, and I won’t be able to get anyone else. But forget about me and go get the girl you want before she believes that you’ve truly moved on. I have haunted your brain for six years. It will be hard for me to move on, but I can if I know that you’re happy.”

You shed some tears as well and give her one big hug. “Brooke,” You say. “You’ve known Tyler for years, as long as D has.” She laughs and says bye. You leave and head over to.... Wait, you don’t know where. Taking out your phone, “Hi Destiny. Could you meet me at the mountain?” She agrees and you both go there. It’s almost midnight now and the two of you are tired but go anyway.

“I’m sorry, Destiny. Truly, I am.” You say. “Sorry for what?” “For leaving you all those years ago. I never really wanted to, but I knew I couldn’t live with trying all my life. I was heartbroken for months and I guess I still am, unless you’d take me back.”

“Woah, whoa, what about Brooke?” “She’s the one who asked me to leave her and come to you.”

She grabs your hand and pulls you to the top. Still clutching your hand, she sits down and motions for you to do the same. You sit down and you automatically relax. She then let’s go of your hand and turns to face you. Your heart is beating oddly fast and you fear what she’ll say.

“I never helped you or did anything to you. Why am I so special and important to you?” Your eyes widen. You can’t fathom why she said that. Doesn’t she know how she saved you after your brother and mother died? Doesn’t she know that because she could never see your expressions, she always made you happy? Doesn’t she know how you could always be yourself around her and she made you want to be better than yourself? How doesn’t she know that she is the most amazing girl on the planet?

You tell her all this and she cries. “Don’t cry, what happened?” You ask, rubbing her back. “I thought no one could ever love an ex blind person like me.” “Well, guess what?” You laugh. “I do.” She half sobs, half laughs and leans into you. You can feel the smile spreading across your face as you stand up with her and walk down.