I try to escape her

           TW: TRIGGER WARNING                       

                       MONTHS AGO

“Sadie let’s go” I say to the girl with a white dress on. She follows me with a smile as the others look at us weirdly. We sneak off to the bathroom and we get the tiny pills. We laugh as we stuff them into our mouths. We both smile and go back to class. We talk through the whole period and the teacher holds me back but Sadie stays with me. 

                                 CURRENT TIME

 Thoughts swirled in my head, making me dizzy. Taps of the rain on the roof was the only thing I could hear. I get out of my bed and grab some clean clothes to change into. I grab my worn out shoes with holes in the back and put them on. I run out the door with my keys in hand. I drove to the place I couldn’t keep my mind off of. Her house. Parking in the driveway I sit in my car, hesitant to get out. I finally burst out of the car shielding myself from the pouring rain. I walk up to the door and knock on it sharply. My heart raced as I waited for someone to answer. A tall brunette boy answered the door. A small smile formed on my face as I felt closer and closer to Sadie. 

“Hi Lukas” I said, wiping my hands on the side of my pants. 

“Who are you?” He questions, genuinely confused.

“Lukas don’t you remember me, it’s Sadie’s best friend” I say panicking. 

“Who’s Sadie?” He says, yawning.

 My heart races even faster and everything starts to get blurry.

“Your sister…” I trail off.

I run to my car and drive away as fast as I can. I stop at a sketchy gas station. My hands are in my hair and my heart is beating faster than the speed of light. Lukas and I were pretty close but not close enough to joke about this kind of thing. I stumble for my phone and grab it off the ground. I dial Mrs.Carman’s number, Sadie’s mom. 

“Hello!” She says brightly

“HiMrs.CarmanIjustwanttosaythatI’msorryaboutSadieandIstillmissher” The words stumble out like one word.

“Calm down cowgirl” She says in her southern accent, chuckling.

“Firstly who’s Sadie and Secondly what’s your name sugar” She says in a sweet voice. I craved the feeling of being near Sadie and her family. I end the call and the phone drops to the ground escorting the empty soda cans and school supplies. 

“Hey lady, are ya gonna buy some gas or what?” An old man yells at me.

I drive back home and sit in my car, thinking. Sadie had been gone for a couple months, they couldn’t have already forgotten her. Tears formed in my eyes and I let it all out. 

I quickly sat up as I heard birds chirping. My neck aches from sleeping in a weird position. I quickly scoop up my school supplies and start the car. I panic realizing I have barely any time left until my first class starts. I park my car and run into campus. I find my seat when two of my friends walk up to me. 

“Look at you in the class photo” Sammy laughs

“Haha look at you” Kaya says pointing at me.

I stare at myself in the photo. My pale complexion, chapped lips and tired eyes. Did I really look like that? Sammy drags me to the bathroom and I follow her. She stares into the mirror fixing her hair and I sit on a sink. 

“Hey, can I see the class photo again?” I ask Sammy acting casual.

“Sure” She hands me the photo.

I grab the photo and try to find Sadie. She was right next to me, she wore a plain white dress. I looked for minutes but I couldn’t find her. I remember seeing her on picture day. Why wasn’t she in the photo?

I walk out of the bathroom and go back , ignoring the calls of my friend. I walk past the classroom and leave the school. I run to my car and drive home. I go to my bedroom and lay on my bed. Ignoring the fact that my muddy shoes will stain the light bed sheets. I grab my phone and call someone before I can stop myself. A therapist. Maybe they will believe me and I can get my Sadie back. The phone rings and a lady answers. 

“Kate?” She says

“How did you know?” I asked

She continued the conversation and we decided to meet on friday. Only three more days. I kick off my shoes and open my very bottom drawer to find pills I don’t remember getting. Suddenly it grabbed it. I opened the bottle and around five pills spilt out. My hand moved on it’s own and I put them all in my mouth. I saw her. Sadie. 

I spit out the pills and my heart started racing. Suddenly it all came back to me. The pills, my friends concerned about me and lastly Sadie. I quickly dialed the therapist’s number and she answered right away and I told her everything. She told me to come to her office right away. I grabbed my things and went to my car and drove to the address she gave me. 

“Hello Kate you can call me Margot” She greeted me with a huge smile.

“Hi” I said hesitantly 

“Can you tell me what happened” She asks sweetly

“Sadie…” I trail off

“What about her?” She replied

“She seemed so real” I say fidgeting with my sleeve

“Calm down, there's no reason to be nervous,” Margot says, soothing my nerves. I stop bouncing my leg and wipe the sweat off my hands. 

“It was all a hallucination” I say quietly

Margot looks at me in the eyes and pushes a water bottle towards me. I accept her offer and take a drink of water. I imagine my old self, pale skin, frizzy and un-brushed hair with dirty clothes on. I think about how free I felt with Sadie but how she would make me do so many things. 

“Are you okay” Margot asks

“Yeah” I offer a small smile. 

“So I went crazy and nobody told me” I say, my smile leaving my face.

“We tried,” Margot said, sighing and writing something down on a notebook.

That night when I got home I saw Sadie again. I want to escape her, I try to escape her but she pulls me in every time