The Invisible Fan

As Gerard climbed the steps of the buzzing stands, making his way to his usual spot at the 5th row from the top, he kept looking at the score board. How on earth did he manage to miss an entire half? Never before had he misjudged the starting time of his daughter's soccer games. And now today, of all days, it had happened. He couldn’t quite put his finger on why it happened, but that didn't matter now. He was here.

He quickly slipped into his seat at the 5th row. The parents around him didn’t glance his way, nor did they acknowledge his hurried arrival. They were chatting with each other or preoccupied with their phones. Gerard didn't mind though.

He looked out onto the field to locate Tina. But the players of both teams were still clustered at their dugouts, sipping from water bottles and listening intently to their coaches’ last-minute instructions. Gerard's eyes anxiously traced over the huddled team in red, searching for Tina's characteristic long legs, blond ponytail and red hair band. But he couldn't spot her. Maybe she was still sitting in the dugout? An unsettling thought started to gnaw at him. Tina often played just one half so that the coach could give everyone a chance on the field. What if he had missed seeing her in action already? He knew how much she loved to be out there, and the idea of not catching even a glimpse of her playing was heart breaking.

His mind drifted back to the past few weeks. For a girl who had always been so laid-back and cheerful, his 15 year old had been unusually tense and anxious leading up today's big game. The pressure of going up against the league’s top team had been quite something. Even more so because if her team, currently second in the league, could pull off a victory, they would claim the championship. So it was more than just a game.

Gerard snapped out of his anxious stream of thoughts as the announcer’s voice reverberated through the high school stadium:

“Alright, folks, here we go! It’s time for the second half. The score is tied at 1-1, so anything can happen. Let’s hear it for both teams as they take the field again!”

As he noticed the teams coming back onto the field under loud cheering from the crowd, Gerard leaned forward, his eyes scanning the team in red. Within a few seconds he spotted the unmistakable swish of his daughter's blonde ponytail and her red head band as she took her position at the right side of the defensive line. A warm smile spread across his face. He noticed Tina scanning the sea of faces after she took her position. Gerard immediately jumped up, wildly waving his arms, and started shouting her name.

“Tina! Over here!"

But his gestures and voice were seemingly drowned out by the people around him cheering and yelling the names of their loved ones. Tina turned back to the game, unaware of her dad's desperate attempt to catch her attention.

The referee blew the whistle to start the second half.

From that moment on the buzz of the crowd faded into the background as Gerard watched every single movement of his Tina. She was everywhere on the field, her long legs carrying her swiftly across the grass, chasing every ball and defending against every attack. Her blonde ponytail whipped behind her like a flag of determination. It filled Gerard with immense pride, remembering the days they practiced together in their backyard.

From time to time he noticed Tina scanning the stands with a flicker of hope in her eyes. Each time she did so, Gerard jumped up, waved his arms with all of his might and shouted her name. Yet, no matter how hard he tried, it always ended with a look of disappointment on his daughter's face. Why He couldn’t quite shake the feeling of something being different.

As the minutes ticked by, the intensity on the field grew, with both teams fighting fiercely to gain the upper hand. Gerard watched Tina with mix of pride and concern. She was giving it her all, but he could also see the strain beginning to show. Her movements, once fluid and relentless, were growing slower, her breath coming in heavy gasps. She regularly wiped sweat from her forehead. Gerard could see her determination to make a difference.

As the game edged closer to its conclusion, the score still stubbornly tied at 1-1, there was a sudden a blur of movement, and a sharp collision. Tina was down. A collective gasp rippled through the stands. Tina lay sprawled on the ground, the harsh impact of the tackle from her opponent evident in the way she clutched her ankle. Gerard's instinctively leaned forward, desperately wanting to rush to her side.

From her place on the field, he noticed Tina scanning the stands again with that familiar flicker of hope in her eyes. At first, her gaze moved past him, and Gerard's heart sank. How he had wanted to be there for his little girl right now. But then, in a fleeting moment, their eyes met and he could see a look of recognition flashing across her face along with that beautiful smile of her. She blinked, as if trying to focus, to hold onto that brief, magical connection. Gerard felt tears prick at the corners of his eyes.

And then it was gone. Tina’s gaze wavered and shifted, as he watched her being helped to her feet by a teammate.

A wave of relief swept through the stands and the audience erupted into applause.

“Way to go, Tina!” someone called out.

“Come on, you can do it!” another yelled.

In the midst of the applause and cheering, a pair of parents near Gerard exchanged hushed words. Their conversation was nearly drowned out by the noise, but a snippet reached his ears.

“It’s amazing she’s even playing,” one said.

“Especially after losing her father just a few days ago.”

The words struck Gerard as if hit by a lightning bolt. He looked around, suddenly aware of the strangeness of it all—how no one had acknowledged him so far, how his calls and gestures had gone unnoticed by his daughter, and how he had forgotten about the time of this important game. The crowd’s cheering and clapping faded into the background as Gerard quietly absorbed the reality. How did this happen?

He turned his gaze back to Tina, who was now back on her feet, her spirit unbroken despite the pain. Watching her, Gerard's heart ached with both pride and sorrow. Yes, he was dead. But in that fleeting, magical moment when their eyes had met, he was certain she had seen him. It was a bittersweet realization, but Gerard found peace with it, knowing that his daughter carried him in her heart, and that, somehow, he could still be there for her in spirit.