Who knew I would one day return to the very place Alicia died and Alex was born. After spending 40 years of my life terrorizing others with my name and burying my past under guns, threats and brutal murders I finally came back to where it all began. I now stand staring at a small half decayed house in a small village that no longer exists. I stand outside my house looking at everything that I once used to call mine, everything that made me human. Even though this house may decay into oblivion no one will remember there are still some parts that remain in tacked. I walked through the flower arch into the front garden, there were weeds and wild plants as far as I could see. The flower arch is no longer filled with flowers rather it's now just a wire.
As I walk into the garden a
memory flashes before my eyes.
I was 3 and was in the
garden alone playing with my toy shovel and the whole gardening kit. Mama and
Baba were inside in the kitchen watching me play. Mama was preparing her
special breakfast which always smelled sweet in the morning wind. And Baba was
reading his newspaper telling mama what had happened and what would happen.
“Alicia come in, breakfast
is ready” Mama had called out to me and I had run inside at lightning speed
leaving all my toys where they were.
“Mama! I want that plate,
the one with the flowers” I yell as I struggle to get on top of my seat. Mama
brings my food to my plate and then brings her and baba’s food.
“When I grow up I want to
play in the garden all day” I say as I munch on my food.
“Sure sweetie,” Baba said.
The flashback ended and
after that it was blank but one thing is for sure I never grew up to become a
gardener. I took a turn and walked into the kitchen. It was smaller than I
imagined. The small table was overturned and the chairs smashed. The doors of
the cabinets were open and dust covered every inch of the kitchen.
I was 6 that year. Mama and
baba were in the kitchen and they were yelling at each other. I stood by the
door not looking in but earring everything they said.
“How could you, we have a
child and you put us all in danger” mama said her voice was cracking.
“I’ll fix it. Just give me
the money and I’ll give it to them and they will leave us alone,” Baba yelled.
“You said that last month and
the month before that…” At this point baba slapped mama and she fell to the
ground. From the door I could hear mama sobbing. I went to her when baba had
left, mama hugged me until nightfall.
I walked through the
kitchen door into the main hall. The furniture was in place except it had
ripped from places and the table was broken. The glass fragments were still on
the floor and the feathers from the pillow. I stopped before I could walk any
further and turned left towards the stairs. I took the stairs up, and as far as
I could remember there were only two bedrooms and a bathroom on that floor. One
used to belong to me and the other bedroom belonged to mama and baba. I walked
into the smaller one, it’s walls were baby pink and a few Barbie dolls were
I turned 7 two days ago and mama and baba had
brought me another Barbie doll, this one had a whole house with it and many
pretty dresses. Mama and baba still had fights but they would have them when I
was at school. They thought I didn’t know but I would come home and see new
bruises on mama’s hand. Mama came to my room that night to put me to bed and
sing me my favorite lullaby. I had stopped mama in between and asked her in a
whisper “Does baba not love you anymore?”
“Honey, he does love me.
Why would you ask this?” she replied in a whisper.
“I saw him hit you and you
two yell each other about money. Mama, are you not happy?”
“Your baba loves me and the
money talk is an adult issue you don’t have to worry about now. Everything will
be fine soon and close your eyes and try to sleep” mama kissed my forehead and
left my room leaving the door ajar.
I still couldn’t sleep. All
I could hear was baba asking mama for money.
I took the stairs and came
back to the living room. This is where it all went down. I remember it was 3
months after my birthday and I still remember it like it happened yesterday.
I came home early from
school and found mama and baba sitting in the living room with men I didn’t
recognize. They were all formally dressed but most of them were standing and
only one was seated opposite to mama and baba. Mama gestured to me to go to my
room but the man called out.
“This must be Alicia. Come
have a seat with us” the man on the sofa called out. The man who when I
examined was an elderly, maybe late 70s or so. I hesitated for a minute but
then took the seat in between mama and baba.
“Alicia, how old are you if
you don’t mind me asking” the man continued.
“I just turned 17, a few
months ago” I had answered.
“You’re old enough, 17.
Almost an adult”
“Old enough for what?” I
“Well old enough to know
the truth, of course. I don’t think you should be kept in the dark any longer.
Isn’t that right?”
I looked at my parents and
they had a dead serious look on their faces.
“We cannot. She cannot know
the truth,” Baba had said angrily. I think he forgot I was sitting there.
“Either you tell her
yourself or I will. And you will regret it” the men who remained standing now
had one hand in the inside of their jacket. Mama took my hands in hers and
looked me in the eye.
“Alicia my child…” tears
were forming in her eyes “…we…we are not your real parents. We took you in when
you were a baby and…”
“Cut the bull Mary-Ann…”
the elderly man raised his voice “…even now you’re feeding her lies.”
“Mary-Ann? But her name is
Anna. Anna Smith, why are you calling her that?” I asked looking at mama then
baba then the elderly man, nothing made sense.
The elderly man finally
spoke up again “Alicia these people you call your parents are in fact the very
people who took you from your home just to exchange you for money. You are the
youngest child of the Montgomery family who was kidnapped by them when you were
a month old. They intended to keep you hidden until the time they could
exchange you for money”
“That is not true, yes we
took you but we took you because we didn’t want you to grow up in a criminal
family where murder is just another past time” mama said holding on to me. “We
changed our names and moved here so no one could find you. Believe me Alicia we
did this for your own good”
“She will return with us to
her family” the elderly man stood up.
“No!! I don’t care if they
aren’t my real parents, they raised me. I will not leave them”
The elderly man gestured to
his men to take me outside. Baba tried to stop them but they pulled a gun on
him. I was dragged outside and by the time I reached a black SUV I heard
gunshots. Few minutes later the elderly man and his other men came out. I broke
free of the grip and ran inside. The living room was trashed and in the middle
lay my parents in a pool of blood. I stared at their lifeless bodies until I
I sat on the sofa
remembering every time there were fights in this house over money, they could
have been solved if they had given me back. They could have lived a peaceful
life from the money they would have gotten. But they never gave me away because
they truly loved me. If they could see me now after 40 years and countless
murders they would have been disappointed.
I remained seated on that
sofa, every good and bad part of my first 17 years flash before my eyes one
more time. I knew my time was near but I could wait for it to come so I took
the small vile from my pocket and drank it. Slowly I got light headed and I was
dozing off into an endless slumber. Today 17 years ago I turned into Alex Montgomery
and today 17 years later I tend to kill both Alex and Alicia. I was going to
reunite with those who truly loved me. I’m going to die where I lived the most
precious days of my life.